evile

No, it is not fair. Some people are born with damage or have experiences in their formative years that cause them to grow into disordered, abusive adults. It’s not their fault they were born into that situation. It’s not the fault of any child born with physical or mental disabilities, it’s a hard and terrible life.

But please try to see that no one deserves to be abused by a narcissist. They mistreat people terribly. They are in a state of arrested development where they crave the unconditional love and absolute nurture that is given to an infant, while also hating, resenting, and rebelling against the caregiver/romantic partner/parentified other—they are like an infant and a teenager all at once. They crave love and belonging, and they resent the person giving them love and nurturing, all at the same time.

No one deserves to be mistreated by a person they love. Reserve your empathy and kindness for the victims of the narcissist, as the narcissist is not capable of receiving or giving any genuine feelings of kindness or caring. It isn’t fair but you don’t deserve to be abused, either.

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