yes, this.

http://www.thisisawar.com/AbuseEmotional.htm

This is why I run far,far away from people who portray themselves as 'victims'... Claiming victimhood allows them to rationalize any and all abuse they dish out.

I have been abused. I am a survivor, NOT a victim. I will not allow my abuser(s) to win by becoming a monster. I will not excuse, justify, or explain away any bad behavior on my part by whining about what someone in my past did to me. I will own it and I will do my best to apologize, make amends if possible, and not repeat the mistake.

I aim to become a better person, not pass on misery because someone once inflicted misery on me.

I will not close my heart because it has been wounded in the past. I want to be open to new people and new experiences in life.

At the same time, I will not allow myself to be treated badly by the people I choose to keep in my life.

I am a grown woman, and this is what healthy, sane, responsible adults do.

Also, most definitely THIS. It is far too easy to get addicted to drama and mistake the excitement you feel for love. But once you stop jumping through hoops and stop to catch a breath, you may see it for what it is--a very shabby dog and pony show indeed.

I really liked this!!

The Ripening
Apple

Friday January 27,
2012

When you take a bite
of an apple that’s not ripe, perhaps even bitter, the problem isn’t
with the apple; the problem is we didn’t wait for the tree to get to the
place where the apple is ripe. It’s our timing that is the problem, not
the apple itself, nor the tree.



This is a powerful message for us, because it makes clear that the only
real problem we have is that our process is not yet complete. That means
we cannot beat ourselves up because we’re angry, sad or depressed, or
because we haven’t reached our goals or benchmarks.



We’re just a work in progress. We are the fruit not yet ripe for the
picking. Would you cut down a tree because it gives unripe apples? No.
You would be patient and have trust in the process.




Ditto for you.