Mar. 17th, 2005

evile: (clutter)
 

 

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    evilE

    Mar. 17, 2005

     

    I had a really fun time. It was a long-ish table, so I didn't get to
    visit with anone at the other end, but our end was pretty funny. I
    wish I was more like Chancie--she got up and walked around, came over
    to see what my hideous dessert was all about, etc. She even helped
    me dissect the fried horta-embryo. God, we laughed so much we cried.

    Here are LJ entries about it:

    Rain King (rainking1) wrote,
    @ 2005-03-16 21:29:00

    "Yes...that's it! I hate this! It is revolting! More, please."
    Another day with the emotion chip back in, only this time I actually
    felt a high instead of a bunch of lows. We went to poly dinner, and
    I actually laughed at something until I was teary-eyed...I can't
    remember the last time that happened. The dinner was at the Bake
    House, and bramblekite ordered a dessert called "fried custard" or
    something...it was hands down the most disgusting dessert we'd ever
    seen. I'll never make fun of Mexican fried ice cream again, because
    it's a fine souffle compared to this thing...I swear, it looked like
    a Horta from Star Trek. I asked her to look underneath it to see if
    it had scorched the words "NO KILL I" on the plate. She had to cover
    it with a napkin and have it taken away because it was just too
    upsetting to look at.

    evile (bramblekite) wrote,
    @ 2005-03-17 07:44:00

    Current mood: silly

    The sitcom that is my life.
    "E goes to dinner; Hilarity Ensues!"

    Last night we went to the Bakehouse for dinner. I'm sure there are
    good things on the menu. (from the way the waitress and the menu went
    on, I think it was the sausage) Unfortunately, I didn't have any of
    them.

    thewordnerd and I got cheese fondue to share; it tasted as if it was
    made of some kind of swiss-flavored Velveeta. An almost-expired
    votive flickered feebly below the small crock of white petroleum-
    product 'cheese'. Stale bread and browning apple slices completed the
    tableau.

    Then came my salad; the pepper and garlic dressing was a thing of
    misery, and when I found the evil lurking radish, it was all over.

    Finally, I ordered dessert. Dear ghod.

    I think it even beats the Fried Muppet I got at Sarovar that one time.

    I haven't laughed so hard in ages. It's such a bizarre sensation to
    be giggling helplessly while your stomach turns in disgust...

    {edit: New at The Bakehouse: Festering Chicken Goo}

evile: (TX)
This is a clarification/expansion of my last post. It's not just about money, it's about reciprocating, in whatever ways you can, when you have people in your life that you care about and want to have a relationship with. I probably don't have enough time right now to say this right, but I am going to try.

Until a couple of years ago, my only friend in Austin was a person I'd been friends with all my life. Our mothers were friends in college. We literally knew each other from birth.Read more... )

In contrast to that 'friendship,' I now find myself in the company of a wonderfully diverse bunch of people who seem to value me for...ME.Read more... )

And yet, in the midst of this newfound blessing, I find myself slipping back into the old pattern of giving and doing for someone who is not reciprocating. And unsure, unable, unwilling to ASK for what I would like from them. Hints haven't been good, and hinting has made me feel hypocritical and uncomfortable, as I like to pretend that I'm very outspoken and blunt and always say what I think. I don't want to become a doormat. I don't want to lose a friend. But when all is said and done, I'd rather cut that person loose now than waste any more of my life being used. I guess I am really meant to learn how to ask for what I need from people, how to tell people "no" and stop being a doormat. It's a tough lesson. Bear with me, please. I am trying.

{edit} Here's another thought I had:
Friendship means I have the right to ask for what I want. And you have the right to ask for what you want. Asking for what you need does not in any way obligate the other person to give it to you. If you are unable or unwilling to meet my stated desires or needs, you can say "no", and I reserve that right as well. One NO is not a deal-breaker, it will not end the friendship. A series of NO's, a constant NO, will eventually lead me to believe that since you're unwilling or unable to be a friend on the level I desire, I should seek friendship elsewhere.
evile: (clutter)
 

 

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    evilE

    Mar. 17, 2005

     

     

    evile: I was talking to a friend of mine who is in SCA last night.
    She said the SCA people are snobby at times, and that keject and
    jubilee may be treated badly at Gulf Wars. Leaving them more
    vulnerable to skye_ds...if they feel left out or snobbed against in a
    place where she's the only person they know, the only friendly face.
    I'm really worried...
    Sharjinka: I am too! I was afraid of that.
    Sharjinka: I'm used to the SCA snubbing me but this will be a new
    experience for them.
    Sharjinka: I hope they're okay. And I hope A[skye] doesn't take advantage
    of the situation.
    evile: Seems like she is good at setting up situations where people
    feel bad and A is the one to 'rescue' or 'comfort' them...
    Sharjinka: I'm really worried now. This SUCKS!
    evile: *nodnod* When they get back, we will need to be SURE that they
    feel welcome and appreciated, build their egos back up from where
    they might have gotten knocked around by the SCA people...
    evile: make sure they know they have more friends who care than just
    A, sonar0m and sineater
    Sharjinka: I don't think the SCA people respect A a great deal. They
    might be knocked for being associated with her.
    Sharjinka: I know. I'm so worried.
    evile: A doesn't get that, she thinks it's 'personality conflicts'
    between her and specific people.
    Sharjinka: Considering the horse people never ask her to participate
    in anything they do, I don't know how she could miss that.
    evile: She doesn't notice a lot of stuff, too, so she may not even
    realize that a majority of SCA people aren't interested in spending
    time with her, or even actively mocking her.
    Sharjinka: I have seen them mock her pretty openly.
    evile: Sweetie's mocked her openly to her face and she didn't seem to get
    it.
    Sharjinka: I'm surprised she didn't notice it.
    Sharjinka: Wow.
    evile: and yet she'll take a simple disagreement and say it was a
    personal attack.
    evile: *shrug*
    Sharjinka: *sigh*
    Sharjinka: I'm surprised she hasn't noticed how most in HFS ignore
    her.
    evile: I think she's pretty used to being ignored.
    Sharjinka: *sigh* I am most definitely worried.
    evile: We just need to see if there's any way we can do 'triage' once
    keject and jubilee are back with us...seriously, anybody you know at
    Baylor that you can send to just spend time with him as friends,
    please please do.
    Sharjinka: Okay. I'll put Jose and Katie on it. They can help out a
    bit, I think.
    evile: The way she snagged sineater is he was off at UT and living on his
    own,and the family was all in SAn Antonio or off at college (me) and
    he didn't have a support system for realitiy checks.
    evile: Katie is a really wonderful person. And I think she can manage
    to be friendly and supportive without making them feel like they have
    to choose between A and her.
    Sharjinka: Yeah...Keject is a different personality type with
    confidence issues.
    Sharjinka: Yes, exactly.
    evile: I can't quite get a fix on Jose. I don't think he likes me
    much, but I do think he is very honest and honorable...but might not
    be able to keep from saying what he thinks of A and that whole
    situation, which may put them on the defensive.
    Sharjinka: Yeah...he runs on emotions but he's a good person
    overall.
    evile: I know he's a good person. Just a bit too stubborn and
    judgemental at times, from what I've seen
    Sharjinka: That's very true. He's wound kind of tight.
    evile: But a lot of his ideals are similar to [Keject]: ie; wanting to
    save himself for marriage & such....
    Sharjinka: Yes. That's true.
    evile: One thing I've heard from both E and A is that Jose is a
    hypocrite in that regard...if [Keject] looks up to Jose and believes
    that he says one thing and does another re: sexual purity, he may
    have his ideals shaken up enough to consider whether he should keep
    his own ideal.
    Sharjinka: Jose is a BIT of a hypocrite but not as much as A, I think.
    evile: *nod*
    Sharjinka: Of course....Jose and I spent time together when he was my
    squire so I am a bit defensive about that. The boy does have his
    faults though.
    evile: but one hypocrite telling you what you may want to hear is
    more believable/desirable than another telling you something you
    don't want to hear...if that makes any sense.
    Sharjinka: ??????
    evile: Like, if A the hypocrite says premarital sex is a wonderful
    cool pagan thing to do, and J the hypocrite says premarital sex is a
    sin (but he's done it, or at least it's implied by A that he
    has)...what is a horny 19 year old boy goign to want to believe?
    evile: I had 2 friends in my college age, both guys, who were
    basically coerced into losing their virginity too soon, and they both
    felt very bad about it afterwards. I felt terrible for them, and
    angry at the women who used their feelings against them like that.
    Sharjinka: I know. That's why I'm so worried about [Keject]. I don't
    really know if he has the confidence to follow his convictions. I
    really don't know.
    Sharjinka: I think Jube respects him enough but I'm not sure A does.
    evile: And depending on how much A influences the two of them, [Keject]
    may end up rushed into something with either one of them...maybe
    Jube, then he'll feel bad about it and A will comfort him, separating
    him from Jubilee in the process.
    evile: I'm just thinking worst-case scenarios here...trying to think
    of ways to avert them...
    Sharjinka: This is just so scary. It was in the back of my mind but
    I didn't want to consider it....
    Sharjinka: There's no way to avert it really. Just hope it doesn't
    happen.
    evile: And keep the lines of communication open for Jubilee and
    [Keject]. so they know they have other people they can talk to and be
    with.
    Sharjinka: I'm sure I can talk to [Keject] online when he gets back.
    evile: *nodnod*
    Sharjinka: If it's bad, I can drive up there.
    evile: It's so hard not to sound judgemental where A is
    concerned...and that's pretty much the worst thing anyone could do
    Sharjinka: If she has proven she can be trusted, it would be
    judgmental. She's proven she can't be trusted so I don't consider
    judgmental. Just one of those truths about someone I don't like to
    think about.
    evile: Yeah...but some people aren't ready or willing to deal with
    the truth....so you have to be careful how you present it.
    Sharjinka: I'm still sort of hoping they realize the truth on their
    own.
    evile: If they aren't isolated from the rest of their friends &
    family, so they can constantly see the difference between A's and
    other peoples' interactions with people & loved ones...they will be
    able to come to their own conclusion.
    Sharjinka: I really do hope so.
    Sharjinka: I'm really scared now. I'm glad Spring Break is almost
    over.
    evile: me too. I hadn't even considered the possiblity that she would
    use the SCA people against Jubilee and Keject until Maggiemaepisces brought it
    up.
    Sharjinka: I had thought about it but I was hoping I was wrong.
    evile: *sigh* I'm sure sonar0m' family would be relieved if he got
    loose.
    evile: The way she got kaleon was to tell him that sineater was
    mistreating her, and kaleon went into rescuer-mode. The cure for that
    was when he stayed with them for a while and realized who was
    mistreating whom.
    Sharjinka: I know they deeply disapprove of it. They won't loan him
    a car or anything. I feel sorry for them.
    evile: I do, too. What an awful situation for them to be in.
    Sharjinka: I think the more they try to restrict him, the more he
    goes to her.
    evile: I was thinking that much time with A would make [Keject] and J.
    see what was up...but then if everyone else ist reating them badly
    and A is their safe refuge, they might not see it.
    evile: Yeah, that's how we fucked up with sineater, the same way M's
    family is fucking up with him.
    evile: At least M's family tried to get him into therapy
    Sharjinka: They did?
    evile: yes, they did. A even went once, that I know of.
    Sharjinka: What was the therapy about??? If I can ask....
    Sharjinka: sonar0m seems to have a family that really cares. He
    should listen to them.
    evile: I think the therapy was about him being with her. And then
    apparently he shut down the therapist by telling him and his family
    that skye_ds would not be a topic for discussion
    Sharjinka: Oh....damnit.... why not?? *sigh* Whah.
    Sharjinka: If you're comfortable with a relationship and it's
    healthy, why not talk about it?? ;-) Sneaky of me....
    evile: I don't know...I think it was probably her doing.
    Sharjinka: Probably. *sigh* This is just sickening.
    evile: yah. I need to not think about that for awhile. focus on good
    stuff.
    Sharjinka: I WAS focusing on good stuff. ;-) Thanks a lot!!! ;-)
    evile: sorry. :(
    Sharjinka: No problem. *sigh* I knew it was a possibility.
    Sharjinka: Not your fault she is that way.
    Sharjinka: I just wish that Jubilee and [Keject] didn't trust her so
    completely. [Keject] is still open to me but Jubilee is being a bit
    standoffish.
    Sharjinka: I want comfort food. Whah!!!
    Sharjinka: And JG.
    Sharjinka: Wearing comfort food.
    evile: *nodnod*
    Sharjinka: :-D
    evile: *grins*
    Sharjinka: *sigh*
    Sharjinka: Mint chocolate chip boyfriend.....
    Sharjinka: Yum.
    evile: heehee :) I hear ya...
    Sharjinka: :-D
    Sharjinka: And some Benny Goodman....some jazz.....
    evile: Too bad mine is going out drinking tonight :P
    Sharjinka: I don't know if the bf is coming over tonight or not. My
    Dad is coming by to fix the washer. *sigh* I can barely contain the
    excitement but I will be happy to have the washer fixed!
    evile: *nod* our dishwasher ended up needing a new line from the sink
    to the washer, so Sweetie did that last night.
    Sharjinka: Did that work out?? I don't know anything about that sort
    of thing!
    Sharjinka: I was a little bit upset when A got online and started
    talking to me about the SCA and how jealous everyone was of her.
    evile: Sweetie had to go to home depot and get some copper tubing and
    fittings, but once he got everything he needed, he was fine.
    evile: I don't know what she thinks she has to be jealous of, but
    whatever.
    Sharjinka: She told me that everyone is jealous that she has men to
    do her bidding but she welcomed them to get their own and stop being
    jealous of her. I almost died.
    evile: *laff* Okay then.
    Sharjinka: *sigh* Ack!
    evile: she sure does live in a different world than hte rest of us..
    Sharjinka: Yeah...I thought so too. I was trying really hard not to
    gag.
    evile: I think pepole say "I don't like the way you treat your men"
    and she hears jealousy, rather than anger
    Sharjinka: If I ever say it (which I hope I never do), it will
    definitely be out of anger.
    evile: And she will hear you saying that you're dissatisfied with JG
    and wish you had as many men as she does.
    Sharjinka: Yeah....whatever. *sigh* That's why I'm hoping I'll
    never say it.
    evile: *nod* No point. she will just hear what she wants to hear and
    ignore the rest.
    Sharjinka: But I'm supposed to be protecting and guiding [Keject]
    through HFS. It's going to suck if she gets her claws in him.
    evile: *nod* I know you feel protective and somewhat responsible. But
    he is an adult, regardless of his emotional immaturity, and has to
    make his own decisions in life...
    Sharjinka: I know, but I feel like I won't be helping him by doing
    nothing.
    evile: I just remembered a wierd conversation I had with her a long
    long time ago,w hen we lived in the duplex in s. austin--We had 2
    cats, the dog, and my hedgehog at the time, and she was going on
    about how since I had 4 pets, she needed 4 pets too, so we'd be 'even'
    evile: It was very crazy. I think that's the way she thinks about her
    men, too.
    Sharjinka: That is SICK.... What in the world is she thinking??
    Sharjinka: Four pets if you can handle the responsibility....
    Sharjinka: *sigh* I'm almost certain that's how she thinks of it.
    evile: and 2 cats, a dog and a hedgehog don't equal the work and
    responsibility you have to have for even ONE horse.
    Sharjinka: Very true.
    evile: Which I tried to point out, but she wasn't gonna hear it.
    Whatever.
    Sharjinka: I told JG I had a dream where somewhere down the road, we
    were living together and we had horses (yay). I woke up and
    said "it's my turn, isn't it?"
    Sharjinka: When she first told me she was getting horses, she bragged
    constantly about their pedigrees. I kept wondering if she realized
    what she was taking on.
    evile: *laff* what pedigrees. What a looney.
    Sharjinka: Egyptian Arabians....
    evile: whatever.
    Sharjinka: And a paced Morgan.
    evile: whatever.
    Sharjinka: Uhm.....Jess moves well but she is not paced. Just don't
    tell her I said so. She wouldn't believe me anyways.
    evile: and then she has all these bizarre stories about why she
    doesn't actually have their papers...whatever.
    Sharjinka: I assumed she did have them.... I've never seen them.
    evile: nope.
    evile: the story is she got Mirage from a grieving widow who didn't
    have papers for whatevre reason, and sold Mirage for way less than
    she was worth as a result.
    evile: And Jesse was a 'rescue' from 'abusers'
    evile: The first story I heard was that Jess was owned by a freind of
    theirs who got pregnant and couldn't ride,and her new husband didn't
    like the horse anyway, so E and A bought Jess from her.
    Sharjinka: Yeah....well....considering Jess's weight and
    temper....I'm not so sure.
    Sharjinka: That sounds a bit more realistic.
    evile: considering that it was the first story I heard, I believe it
    more than the later version.
    Sharjinka: It does sound more believeable. Especially with Jess's
    attitude. I just don't think she's safe for beginners....and maybe
    not safe for intermediate.
    evile: nope
    Sharjinka: I've seen abused horses and she doesn't really fit their
    profile. They tend to be shy of humans and they can be
    aggressive....but that's only when approached and they feel
    threatened.
    evile: *nod*
    Sharjinka: *sigh* I just have never believed that Jess was
    abused.... At least....not before they bought her.
    evile: *nod* exactly.
    evile: She's smarter and has more spirit than Mirage. If sineater leaves
    skye_ds, we are going to need to be SURE to protect Jessie in the
    process.
    Sharjinka: Jess needs some serious work with a trainer, that's sure.
    evile: *nod*
    Sharjinka: Did the step father talk to sineater yet?
    evile: No. he won't be in TX until the 21st, not in Austin until
    24th. And sineater's in Mississippi. (he's my stepdad, sineater's bio dad,
    btw)
    Sharjinka: Okay....
    evile: I am not sure exactly when they're going to be back from Gulf
    War. The event itself goes through sunday the 20th, and A tends to
    stay until the last minute, and even beyond, running her mouth...
    Sharjinka: Yeah....I heard that.
    evile: she said it was a 7 hour drive, but I am thinking more like 15.
    Sharjinka: I think so too considering where it is.
    Sharjinka: Maybe longer.....you can't consult maps when she's
    around. *sigh*
    evile: For me, it's 9 to new orleans. Starting from rockdale, it
    might be closer to 8. and then mississippi is at least 3 to 4 more
    hours, depending on WHERE in MI it was
    evile: Coming back from sineater's grandfather's funeral, it somehow took
    us 6 from Houston to Austin. I STILL have no fuckin' idea how that
    happened
    Sharjinka: Hard to say!
    Sharjinka: Time warp!
    evile: no shit.
    Sharjinka: :-D

    evile: I keep wondering what I'm going to do when she's finally out
    of our family for good...
    Sharjinka: Celebrate???
    evile: yeah, definitely. As tempting as it might be to rip her to
    shreds after sineater's no longer attached, I think I'll just buy a nice
    bottle of Veuve Cliquot and call it a day.
    Sharjinka: And bring it to my place. Quiet celebration. Whee.
    evile: *nodnod*
    Sharjinka: :-D
    evile: I am often ashamed of myself for how much energy I give to
    her, by worrying about what she's doing to sineater, by talking about her
    to other people...she's not worth as much energy as I give her. I
    need to quit.
    Sharjinka: I think if my sister was in a relationship like this, I
    couldn't stop. I'd be freaking out.
    evile: I do freak out from time to time. I mostly just have to force
    myself not to think about it.
    evile: I probably actually need therapy myself at this point...
    Sharjinka: Don't worry about it too much. I think she effects a lot
    of people that way.
    evile: yup
    Sharjinka: :-D
    evile: The last time I freaked, it was in front of sineater, actually. we
    were talking about our brother [brother A]--he is in the 'sonar0m' position
    in his relationship.
    evile: So sineater was asking about the husband's family,and why haven't
    THEY done anything to get her away from the husband and all of this
    kind of stuff.
    evile: I don't think he realized at that point that the situations
    are very similar, and that when I answered I was answering from teh
    point of view of being in that position.
    Sharjinka: Was he upset or did he not realize it the entire time?
    evile: So I explained the husband's family's point of view--they've
    probably tried dozens of times, and every effort they've made has
    made the husband turna gainst his family and cling more to his
    abusive wife, and how much they love him and want him to be safe and
    happy and how they can't do a goddamned thing becsue the husband is
    an adult and he's made this choice.
    evile: At that point I just broke down and started crying
    Sharjinka: Did he see it then????

    Sharjinka: DAMNIT! I'm sorry....
    evile: I don't know if sineater ever realized I was talking about how I
    feel about him, but they did end up fighting about that trip, so
    maybe it did get through on some level...
    Sharjinka: I wish it would get through on the him leaving her level.
    evile: well...maybe it has. Maybe he will, once they're back from the
    SCA event. I just have to keep planting seeds, keep working on making
    sure he and I are in communication, that he trusts me and knows I
    care...and when he's ready, he will leave.
    Sharjinka: I think that's right. When he asked me out to a
    movie....I almost accepted to talk to him.....but this was back when
    I almost got pulled into it. I just was too scared to get involved.
    evile: *nod* You have to take care of yourself, and protect yourself
    first...if you're a wreck, you won't be in a position to help anyone
    else.
    Sharjinka: I was a wreck when he asked me. I wasn't sure what the
    hell was going on.
    evile: Terriblelynne said teh best thing to me:" I have asked that Deity
    guide me to the right relationship with everyone in my circle of
    knowledge. (I do believe that "right relationship" can mean "no
    relationship", by the way. Often it's the only thing you can do.) "
    Sharjinka: I agree with that!
    evile: I found it to be very comforting. especially in the face of
    how distant I am from my other brother A right now.
    evile: I think you did what was best for you,and somehow managed to
    do it carefully enough that you are still on speaking terms with E
    and A, and A admires you.
    Sharjinka: *sigh* I still feel like I should've done something but
    I was just unsure how to handle the situation.
    evile: I know others who have tried to cultivate a relationship and
    ended up with A declaring them enemies, and sineater behaving
    accordingly, which ends up cutting him off from friends and
    supporters.
    Sharjinka: I always felt that A spent time trying to get at my belief
    structure. That somehow not being poly made me not open minded....
    evile: So the fact that you navigated that maze and came out on the
    other side still friends, says to me that you did EXACTLY the right
    thing.
    Sharjinka: Yeah...I backed up and broke it off.
    Sharjinka: *sigh*
    evile: Even when I've told her time and again that I'm hetero and
    mono, she doesn't seem to believe me.
    Sharjinka: She believes me but I think she considers what I believe
    completely wrong.
    evile: She thinks I became friends with her ex because I wanted him
    for myself.
    Sharjinka: Ewwwww.... kaleon?
    Sharjinka: kaleon always seemed to dislike me intensely.
    evile: yes. That whole post in her LJ about 'lies he's told as pick
    up lines' was aimed at me and one ohter person (from IRC) I think.
    evile: skye_ds probably told kaleon that you didn't like him.
    evile: I had met kaleon in RL exactly once, but when they broke up and
    I reached out to him and said "hey, sorry to hear about it, do you
    want to talk?" one of hte first things he told me was "I know you and
    I have had our differences in the past, but..."
    evile: And Im all like "WHAT differences? I met you ONCE and skye_ds
    did't even introduce us, so I didn't even talk to you and you didn't
    talk to me either"
    Sharjinka: He was very defensive of A and aggressive. I didn't even
    talk much. I didn't understand why he had a problem with me from the
    get go.
    evile: I can guarantee you that she set up that situation very
    deliberately. To keep kaleon isolated, most likely.
    Sharjinka: The pick up lines.....you mean she was trying to warn you
    or just put him down?
    evile: she was trying to put him down.
    evile: I am so glad he's moved on and isn't being drawn into any of
    her drama anymore.
    Sharjinka: I just don't understand her and I'm sort of glad.
    Sharjinka: Is he seeing someone? I mean....did it do damage in other
    relationships??
    evile: he does have a girlfriend now, she's in austin, and he's moved
    to Oklahoma, back in with his parents for now. so it's not a perfect
    situation and he's not 100% 'better' but getting there.
    Sharjinka: That's good to hear.
    evile: Time & distance are good healers.
    Sharjinka: I agree. What is his LJ handle again?
    Sharjinka: brb...building errand....
    evile: kaleon. OK.
    Sharjinka: Okay, back.
    Sharjinka: Did he ever say anything in his LJ about her attacks?
    evile: not directly. But there's been a few things he's posted that
    seem to be about her.
    Sharjinka: Okay.
    evile: And there was a nasty back and forth in his LJ last year
    sometime where he was mourning a HS girlfriend who called to tell him
    she was getting married.
    Sharjinka: Oh....
    evile: an anonymous person (probably A) mocked his bittersweet post,
    and then there was a big back and forth hoo-ha
    evile: And then she wrote in her own LJ about what a jerk he was. And
    he replied and then his reply was deleted.
    Sharjinka: Oh.....
    evile: then she cut & pasted a bunch of Buddhist stuff in her LJ,
    and a couple days later he mocked westerners who try to practice
    eastern religion
    Sharjinka: Oh....so...back and forth....
    Sharjinka: I posted a couple times in Flavio's LJ but I stopped.
    Mocking him didn't make me feel better.
    Sharjinka: I feel bad for saying it, but ranting and getting it out
    made me feel better, but mocking him in his LJ made me feel worse.
    evile: yeah, I think kaleon realized that pretty quick.
    Sharjinka: Took me a couple posts and Flavio has been big enough to
    not mock me in mine. He did copy and paste from my LJ once and that
    pissed me off, but since it was about him......it was somewhat
    justified, I guess.
    Sharjinka: I try not to rant too often but once in a while I do.
    Sharjinka: My ex - the fuckwad. ;-)
    evile: *nod*
    Sharjinka: Except for JG, I've had some pretty bad boyfriends....
    *sigh*
    evile: Gotta kiss a few frogs before you find your prince :)
    Sharjinka: Very true. Oh.....Where is my enchanted prince. I hope
    I find him soon. It seems I've kissed a thousand frogs, one ape and
    one baboon!
    evile: *LOL!*
    Sharjinka: :-D
    evile: I think I know that feeling...all experience is worth having,
    I suppose, even if it doesn't seem like it at the time.
    Sharjinka: Yeah....I often wonder what would happen if Flavio and I
    were alone and left to talk. That would be very awkward! I don't
    know about the experience of dating him. ;-)
    evile: No telling. the Universe has a mean sense of humor sometimes.
    Sharjinka: Yeah. It would be mean. ;-)
    evile: Perhaps you needed to learn what you DIDNT want before the
    universe could give you what you DID want?
    Sharjinka: That's very true. Ewwwww..... ;-)
    evile: yeah...like I said, the Universe has a mean sense of humor :P
    Sharjinka: Very mean. Ick.
    Sharjinka: I'm going to be worrying about the kids until they get
    back. *sigh*
    evile: Yeah. I hope they are home soon.
    evile: Maybe back in time for Drandmir Sunday, even.
    Sharjinka: I was told that they would try. Elections and all that.
    Sharjinka: I can't believe I'm even entering stuff in quals. *sigh*
    evile: Oh, come on, it'll be fun :)
    Sharjinka: ACK!!! Yeah....fun..... [:-}
    Sharjinka: :-P
    evile: you wouldn't do it if it wasn't fun :)
    Sharjinka: True, but I wish I could write some stories. I'm not used
    to writer's block this bad. :-D
    evile: maybe you need to do something else for awhile, takea walk,
    see a movie, get away from thinking about it for a while.
    Sharjinka: True. I've been trying to think of something for the last
    few days. *sigh*
    evile: you could always do something silly as an ice breaker...like
    imagine your characters in Vegas or something.
    Sharjinka: That would be silly and kind of fun. Teleported through
    time. I can see Jinks: BOOZE and GAMBLING and MORE BOOZE!!
    Whee!! ;-)
    evile: Or some kind of cross over between your characters and some
    famous characters from another story (arthurian legend, star trek, PT
    barnum)
    evile: Sharjinka gets recruited by the ballet.
    Sharjinka: ACK!!!! Or the Marx Brothers to be in ballet.
    evile: Just something silly to get the writing going again. Jinx is
    kidnapped by fairies and forced to wear pink frilly things because
    they think she's a fairy godmother trainee
    Sharjinka: HeeHee.....
    Sharjinka: I'll have to think about that one. Isn't it mushroom
    circles or something that you should avoid?
    evile: *nod*
    Sharjinka: Superstition.
    Sharjinka: Okay. Thought so. Read that somewhere once.
    evile: Maybe she eats the ring of mushrooms....and the rest is
    history!
    Sharjinka: Mushroom trip....
    evile: or she stomps on part of the mushroom circle and for her
    punishment has to be a Fairy Godmother for 30 days...wear the gear,
    grant wishes, hang out with spoiled rotten princesses and stupid
    princes.
    evile: "no, stupid, poke the troll iwth the POINTY end of the sword"
    evile: "that's NOT the part of the princess you're supposed to
    kiss!!" *bap!*
    Sharjinka: That would be funny.
    Sharjinka: :-D Wicked!!
    evile: Spoiled princess: "I can't believe your magic wand gave me a
    YELLOW dress! You're a terrible fairy godmother! WAH!"
    Jinx: *boot to the ass* GET YOUR ASS TO THAT BALL NOW!!!
    evile: *turning coach back into pumpkin with spoiled princess still
    inside* "oops"
    Sharjinka: Highlight of the evening. ;-)
    evile: *applause* from the assembled court, who were less than
    impressed with Cinderella's bad manners. Prince charming elopes with
    a serving girl, and they live happily ever after with the 3 blind
    mice.
    Sharjinka: Awesome. You should write children's stories.
    Sharjinka: :-D
    evile: Fairy tales are really fun to mess with.
    Sharjinka: Yep. I do like that. I've read some of the messed up
    ones and they are hysterical.
    evile: Did you ever read "Politically Correct Fairy Tales"? OMG<
    hysterical!!
    Sharjinka: Yes, that's the one! I loved it!
    evile: me too! I was just rolling on the floor :)
    Sharjinka: I'm on amazon.com. I've always wanted to know the title
    so I could buy them! They're .50 cents. I can afford that.
    evile: holy cow, that's awesome! I bet the shipping will be more than
    the actual book on that one! :)
    Sharjinka: The shipping is more but it's under $10 for both books. :-
    D
    evile: rock on. I love Amazon.com!
    Sharjinka: :-D
    Sharjinka: I do quite a bit of my shopping there. I trust it more
    than ebay.
    evile: this is true :)
    Sharjinka: :-D
    evile: I need to stay away from amazon fo ra while. bit I'm getting
    the Varekai soundtrack there, for sure.

    Sharjinka: Yeah!!! That's awesome.
    evile: I really liked the music for Varekai.
    Sharjinka: Yes, I did too.
    evile: My favorite is still Mystere.
    Sharjinka:
    http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ASIN/B0002KQNU4/qid=1111095805/sr=2-
    1/ref=pd_bbs_b_2_1/102-1353188-1726536
    evile: There's a big drum thing at the end of Mystere that is just
    amazing...this giant drum comes down from the ceiling,a nd all these
    smaller drums roll in from all sides of the stage, and there's
    like...15 drummers all going at once. It's incredible.
    Sharjinka: WOW!!!
    Sharjinka:
    http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ASIN/B000003FQY/qid=1111095838/sr=2-
    1/ref=pd_bbs_b_2_1/102-1353188-1726536
    Sharjinka: I'm out of here! Have a good rest of the day!!!
    evile: you too!
    Sharjinka: BYE!

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