2368Krav maga class

Jul. 15, 2004

 

Krav Maga Class was pretty amazing last night. I did get winded
during the warmup, but I made it through everything OK. Bruised the
knuckles on my right pinky & ring-finger. My hand wrap started to
come undone during class, so I took it off. The last part of class,
of course, involved hitting a bag as hard and fast as possible. Ow.
Oh well, it was fun. My 'sparring buddy' was this adorable young man
named Aeneas. Ooh, he was so pretty. It would be ugly and ridiculous
to actually do something carnal with someone that pretty, but it's
sure nice to look at.

If Sweetie hadn't been sleepy & grouchy last night, I might have pounced
on him and had my Valkyrie way with him. O well, his loss ;P

2369Developing Emotional Intelligence.

Jul. 15, 2004

 

Developing Emotional Intelligence.
Top Ten Suggestions
from a website by Steve Hein


1. Label your feelings, rather than labeling people or situations.
"I feel impatient." vs "This is ridiculous."
"I feel hurt and bitter". vs. "You are an insensitive jerk."
"I feel afraid." vs. "You are driving like a idiot."

2. Distinguish between thoughts and feelings.
Thoughts: I feel like...& I feel as if.... & I feel that
Feelings: I feel: (feeling word)

3. Take more responsibility for your feelings.
"I feel jealous." vs. "You are making me jealous."

4. Use your feelings to help them make decisions.
"How will I feel if I do this?" "How will I feel if I don't"

5. Show respect for other people's feelings.
Ask "How will you feel if I do this?" "How will you feel if I don't."

6. Feel energized, not angry.
Use what others call "anger" to help feel energized to take
productive action.

7. Validate other people's feelings.
Show empathy, understanding, and acceptance of other people's
feelings.

8. Practice getting a positive value from their your emotions.
Ask yourself: "How do I feel?" and "What would help me feel better?"
Ask others "How do you feel?" and "What would help you feel better?"

9. Don't advise, command, control, criticize, judge or lecture to
others.
Instead, try to just listen with empathy and non-judgment.

10. Avoid people who invalidate you. While this is not always
possible, at least try to spend less time with them,
or give them psychological power over you.

* First, thanks to Stephen Covey for the title idea. Second, these 10
habits are based on a mixture of my defintion of EQ and the more
academic definition of emotional intelligence offered by John Mayer
and his research colleagues.

Copyright 2002 Steve Hein, May be copied for educational uses.

2370icq w/a

Jul. 15, 2004

evile: howdy. Phone duty today. Only one jerk, the rest have been
cool. I still have 8 min *fingers crossed* no whammies!
SkyeDS: :)
evile: and I get to go home early and hopefully catch a nap before
polydinner. so that's a good tradeoff.
evile: how's your day going?
SkyeDS: it goes
evile: yeah.
evile: I totally forgot that Bastille Day was yesterday. I didn't do
anything.
SkyeDS: drink lots of french wine tonight ;)
evile: well, I went to Krav Maga & beat up on a cute litle boy. But
othe rthan that...no. I should have been pretending he waas louis or
marie antoineete
evile: I'm going to Chuy's tonight. French wine + mediocre Tex-mex is
probably not a good mix.. :P
evile: Then agian, I never would have tried French wine + BBQ at
Salt lick if I hadn't seen J-Law do it first & gotten proven good
results!
SkyeDS: planning on invading Salt Lick Sunday next
evile: Cool.
evile: I doubt I'll be able to muster much enthusiasm for meeting
y'all out there, considering we have so many vegetarians in our fam.
evile: (look at me, rudely assuming I was even invited. bad me!)
SkyeDS: lol I have no expectations
SkyeDS: life is easier that way
evile: Might be helpful if I had a window timewise to present to
others...
SkyeDS: and there is nothing in my social life where you would not be
invited
SkyeDS: camp breaks at noon, I think
evile: I usually assume I'm _not_ welcome unless specifically
invited. Less awkward than assuming I am welcome and showing up to
find out I was not.
SkyeDS: k, well, we would love to see you at teh Salt Lick even if it
isn't likely
SkyeDS: I have cell phone now, don't know number off top of head, but
I think sineater has it written down at home
SkyeDS: so can keep in contact as to when we are actually there
evile: *nods*
evile: a couple of things to know: 1) they dont' seat incomplete
parties 2) they dont' take plastic 3) if you order 'family style' -
everyone- at the table has to order family style.
SkyeDS: last time I went there was only one way to order
SkyeDS: and that was the $10 per person
evile: they have a menu, family style is the best value & what most
people get. But pretty pointless for a vegetarian to order & pay $15
for pickles , beans, and potato salad.
evile: I think family style is up in the $15-range now.
SkyeDS: right
SkyeDS: been many years, but we all paid $10 per, and had all t hat
stuff, plus cole slaw and bread
SkyeDS: and the bread was out of this world
SkyeDS: <doesn't eat cole slaw or potato salad
evile: yeah, I think they include cole slaw & bread,with family
style. I don't care much for either.
SkyeDS: think I'll call and ask if they can fax me a menu
evile: good plan.
SkyeDS: menu online even better
evile: awesome.
SkyeDS: they have a vege only plate
SkyeDS: and a meat only plate
SkyeDS: and I'd be just as happy with just meat
SkyeDS: maybe they'd let me buy bread on the side
SkyeDS: nm, comes on the side
evile: *nods*
SkyeDS: they hav edrinks now
SkyeDS: they d idn't used to, had to bring your own
evile: nope, that's only for the one on 620. The old place is still
BYOB. you can order sodas or tea, but that's it.
evile: wow, I wonder if the one on 620 opend & closed already. I
didn't see anything about it on the website
SkyeDS: pretty pictures
evile: They have a new garden & fountain out back that is pretty
awesome. I've only seen it at night.
evile: That is wierd...I have never seen that place in daylight, as
many years as I've been going....
evile: You'll like the fountain & garden, very Italian.
SkyeDS: nods
SkyeDS: I like victorian, but I also like the more rounded italiante
SkyeDS: err italianate
evile: *nods*
SkyeDS: when I get a carriage horse & carriage, I'll drive you around
the bremond block
SkyeDS: very pretty italianate there
evile: *nods*
evile: I've walked there. It's a nice walk.
SkyeDS: nice drive too
evile: yah, but you don't see as much when you drive.
SkyeDS: makes for good scenery for a carriage drive, is what I meant
evile: I bet.
evile: Erinlefey & tangentsferret were very entranced by the carriages that went by
during the demonstration on Tues.
SkyeDS: I bet, but I'm biased ;P
evile: Maybe around their anniversary, I'll arrange a carriage ride
for them.
evile: That's not till Feb. 15, so I've got time.
SkyeDS: only runs $20
SkyeDS: or did
SkyeDS: been a while
evile: Perhaps I can conspire with Pace to get them downtown for
something else & then surprise them with the ride.
SkyeDS: doesn't sound too hard
evile: assuming Pace & Erinlefey are still dating by then, I guess.
SkyeDS: I have the utmost faith in your sneakiness :P
evile: I will choose to take that as a compliment. :}
SkyeDS: was meant as one :P~~~
evile: well, as we know, I dont' always use my powers for good ;)
SkyeDS: and I'm too lazy to use whatever little powers I have for any
reason at all LOL
evile: heh. I know that feeling, too.
evile: Y'all leaving for the reunion tomorrow?
SkyeDS: yep after work
evile: cool :)
evile: Gotta love it when airfare is cheaper than the hotel you want
to stay at :(
evile: I want to go back to New Mexico & back to Jemez Springs. *sigh*
SkyeDS: would be happy with a nap right now, anywhere
evile: yeah, me too!
evile: Oh well, I get to leave here in about an hour & I can
hopefully catch a little nap before dinner.
evile: Our friend Jaime goes into the 'mothers' room at Dell and
takes naps. I think that's awesome.
evile: I wish we had a quiet room to use here for anything.
SkyeDS: I could probably nap while Hugh is out
SkyeDS: which he is often
evile: *nods*
SkyeDS: but I never know what time he'll be back
evile: too bad you can't hear the exterior door from your office.
SkyeDS: might work if I brought an alarm clock
SkyeDS: I do know how long he plays racquet ball for example
evile: *nods*
evile: My cell phone has an alarm feature in the 'clock' settings.
Yours probably does too.
SkyeDS: mom sent me the book, I'll have to look
evile: mine's pretty old, I'm sure the newer ones have lots more
goodies.
evile: well, time for me to get my paperwork sorted out. I love phone
duty days.
evile: (during the summer at least)
SkyeDS: wind to your wings, bella
evile: *hugs* take care :)