evile: (mask)
Why do we need to 'accept' fat people instead of telling them they should stop eating junk food and go to the gym? Isn't that in their best interest?
 


What does another person’s body or health have to do with you? At all? Do you go up to brown people and tell them to ‘just be white’ and no one will bother them? Do you go up to young women and tell them to just grow a penis so that they won’t be raped and sexually harassed? Do you approach old people hobbling along with a cane and tell them to quit being old so they can stop being so decrepit? Do you approach blondes and tell them to dye their hair brown? Do you walk up to short people and exhort them to become tall? Do you walk up to people attending a church you do not attend and scream at them that they are going to suffer eternally for their wrong beliefs? Do you stand outside voting locations and yell at everyone that they should vote the same way you did? NO? Then mind your own business when you see fat people. They aren’t harming you. Leave them alone.

Obesity is widespread and epidemic in our country. There are many theories as to the reason for that, ranging from industrial agricultural practices to fast food to poverty to the addition of preservatives and high fructose corn syrup to almost every prepackaged item you can buy. It is a problem. And I guarantee you that every single fat person you meet knows they are fat and knows that others see them as having a problem. If they can’t hate themselves into thin-ness, if the dozens of friends, family members, coworkers,and bosses who commented on their weight didn’t change their habits, why on EARTH do you think that your piling your own hate on top of that is going to finally be the magic word they need to hear to finally do the right thing? You don’t know every fat person’s story. You don’t know what they eat or don’t eat. You don’t know their fitness habits! And you can’t tell by looking at a person what their blood pressure, blood sugar, and cholesterol levels may be. There are more than likely fat people walking around who have better health markers than you do.

Finally, when you see a fat person out in the world, you don’t know whether their weight is on the way up or on the way down. Would you really want to break someone’s heart by saying “you’re fat, go to the gym and stop eating junk food” when it turns out that person used to weigh much more than they do currently and have been working very hard and were proud of themselves & having a nice day before you opened your mean ugly mouth?

Mind your own business. Go to the gym your own self. Eat whatever you think is healthy for you and stop being crappy to other people. Acceptance doesn’t mean you have to love someone, or tell them they’re attractive and gorgeous, or sleep with them. It just means you leave them alone and let them live their life without being hateful and ugly to them. If you can accept old people, ugly people, stupid people, and people who don’t share your religious or political beliefs, then you can accept fat people. Stop making assumptions about people’s health by looking at them.


 =====================

evile: (mask)
 

You should do some soul searching and get some therapy, counseling, or spiritual guidance and try to become a better person.

Calling people ugly names makes you the ugly one, not them.

The fact that you still refer to the person as “your” narcissist is a bit telling. As is the fact that you are the one here baiting someone with a nasty, name-calling question. I wonder if the other person was actually the problem (or actually the narcissist) in your ex-relationship.

Get help. This is a really sad and ugly question that reveals a great deal about you that does not invite anyone to admire you.

 




 ========================

hmf.

Apr. 15th, 2015 10:08 pm
evile: (Mermaid)
I am fiercely ambivalent about the 'fat acceptance' movement. If you have good self-esteem at whatever size, shape, weight, or age you are, good for you. I don't, never have, and probably never will. But I accept my non-acceptance of my fat and I know with my smart brain that I am no more or less attractive than most, and that I'm basically OK, and who cares.

If you have a body (and if you're reading this, I assume you do), people are going to look at it and have thoughts, feelings, and judgements about it. What you should or should not be wearing, eating, and/or doing with your body, at your weight, at your age, because of your gender. Whatever.

Here's a secret, and a truth, and a freedom: That judgement has nothing to do with you

http://www.buzzfeed.com/sheridanwatson/are-you-my-doctor-then-shut-up-please#.stbvVrXyOp
evile: (evilE)
So, several of my friends have reposted this.

I don't think hating yourself or your body is ever the answer, but at the same time I know people who have health problems directly related to their weight, diet, and sedentary habits. It's not a fat vs thin thing, though, it's a love yourself and have the best life you can thing. And, yes, I know that some medical conditions cause weight gain, the same as some people's overweight causes their medical conditions. It can be a vicious cycle. So it's never cool to judge, and besides which, hating and shaming people isn't generally a good way to win friends and influence people.

I don't think you can hate yourself thin or hate yourself beautiful, and I don't think you should try. A couple years ago I hated myself and wanted to die, could not sleep, could not eat, and lost 23 ish pounds. I'm sure I looked GREAT, but I don't recommend, seriously.

I'm all about self acceptance, no matter who you are, no matter what you're wearing, or shoving in your face.... Whether your choices are healthy or not, whether or not you have a chronic illness, whatever. Hating yourself isn't going to fix that.

So, yeah, love those rolls.

Just...realize that those rolls don't love you, necesarily. Yes, there ARE health conditions which are created and exacerbated by weight. I'm sorry if that makes you mad, but it's true.

And there are those of us fat girls who are healthier than you are; myself for one. I don't have a single health problem that is related to my weight, and I don't take any meds on any regular basis. I'm not on antidepressants, blood pressure meds, cholesterol meds, or any other thing. No diabetes. No migraines. No PCOS. Nothin. I can run around the block, climb Enchanted Rock, carry heavy things, whatever. Probably not FAST, but whatever. I can do it. I'm built for comfort and endurance.

So...where do I fall on the 'fat acceptance' thing? I still don't really know. I try not to be judgy of other people, and certainly never out loud. It's their business, and I don't know anything about their health or life choices and even if I did, it still wouldn't be my business. I am sometimes not happy with my appearance or my weight. But that's not really anyone's business but mine. I don't care what Society thinks of me, I just know that I liked the way I look better when I was 20-60 lbs lighter than I am now. And it's certainly easier and more fun to shop for clothes when you're a smaller size. And even then I had my bad days. Just like now, most of the days are good days. But sometimes I look in the mirror and go, "ew". Same as everybody, I think. But sometimes I am happy with my body, and I'm totally healthy. So, yes, there ARE fat people who are healthy AND happy with themselves. I'm sorry if THAT makes you mad, but it's true.

I don't care if hot guys want to fuck me. That isn't how I measure my worth as a human being. And it makes me extremely sad and angry and sick that it seems most women still measure their own worth in terms of what they have to offer a man. Being objectified is dehumanizing and awful. Objectifying yourself is sad and awful. Treating other people or yourself as meat is nasty and offensive and it should stop.

And if you pick me up while hugging me, I will f-in KRAV you. I don't like it, so don't do it.
evile: (Default)
bah.

I just got unfriended by someone I have always liked, but not spent much time with.Read more... )

*shrug*

I'm a little bit sorry for hurting her feelings, but mostly just 'meh, my journal.'

I guess that's wrong. Oh well.

(plus, if she won't talk to me, how do I really know what's going on? Maybe my assumptions are dead wrong and she's just locking down her F-list to a smaller group of people she actually spends RL time with, or whatever. Who knows? )

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