1686Re: OH DEAR GHOD

[evile]

Oct. 7, 2003

 

 

Date: Tue, 07 Oct 2003 16:13:37 +0000
From: X
Subject: you only have her side
E-
regardless of what you think and feel I will never be your ex-
friend. I will always love you. Yes, my home was raided. It was
traumatic for the children and for myself. i am not in jail, the
children are with me, and we are fine. i am divorcing [M/husband]. it is
past due. I have tried many times to reach out to you. I have never
fully understood exactly what i did that made you hate me. Yes, M.
and i were doing drugs, for the past 8 months. I was never dealing
them, but I can't speak for M. He and I have basically been
seperated since July. The condition of the house when [X's stepmom] saw it had
to do with the police turning it upside down. All the drugs found
where on M. or in his drawer. The razor blades were from a tool
box. We had recently begun renovating. Having re-painted the living
room, hallway, front bedroom and working our way thru so that it
could be sold. [Stepmom] drastically over-exaggerated things.
I am not a bad person. And the charges against me are dismissed. I
am sober now for 3 weeks. CPS has NO cases pending against me, and
didn't deem me un-fit. [J/Goddaughter] misses you terribly. You have always
been important to her. Please reconsider leaving our friendship. I am
so sorry for having upset and disappointed you. I felt unduly judged
by you when you got angry about my wanting an extra day away from
M. I wasn't, and had never used you as a cover. M and i had had
a bad marriage for a couple of years, and yes, I did have an affair
in January. It was over in January. I really did only want the extra
day for some alone time.
You told me back in April you would always be my friend, I read
your diaries when I can just to know what you have been up to. I'm
sorry about Nicky.
I didn't lose weight because of drugs. The drugs didn't start
until last April and I had already lost 95% of my weight by that
time. You have no reason to believe me, but I have no reason to lie.
Yes, I was open with the kids about my pot smoking, they never saw me
do anything else. The condition of the house was completly from
having every drawer, box, and cabinet's contents thrown about and
scattered. M will be gone for a long time.
Please re-consider opening communication with me.
-X

====
Me to J-law:

Good lord..I can't even have a nice night out without
damned X laying another self-serving guilt trip on
my sorry ass. I can't believe her shit. I was checking
my email before bath & bed and found that garbage.
agh.

I sent it to you from my freaks.net email. AT least
she had the courtesy not to mail that garbage to my
work address.

I am so DONE with her. It used to make my heart pound
when I'd see something in my inbox from her--"Is this
the email that will make me break down and go running
back to her, to do whatever she needs me to do?"...and
now it's just "Jeezus ghod, what the fuck dirty trick
is she trying now?"

*sigh* I just can't believe how selfish and self
centered she is. LIke I give a shit how she lost
weight. What I *do* give a shit about (and want to
KILL HER FUCKING ASS for) is her doing & dealing, or
allowing dealing to be done from her home, where her
children are vulnerable to it.

agh.

Anyway...enough bullshit.

Comments

1694Re: OH DEAR GHOD

[evile]

Oct. 10, 2003
From: Dee
Subject: Re: The latest from Looney Xtal.

Umm.... This would make some great reality show scripting. What
fantasy land is she living in where it's alright to do drugs if
you're honest with your kids about it? And if "having an extra day
away from M" was the honest truth then what was all M's psycho
drama about? I wish I could figure out a way for you to be involved
with J[goddessdaughter] (cuz she needs some SANE roll models) and not have to be
involved with Xtal. I still say those poor poor kids! Like her being
sober for 3 weeks is that big a deal....how about "I've been going to
therapy with the kids" or "I've been going to Narcotics Anonymous"
or "I've been trying to figure out why I"m such a selfish
bitch".....Mother Goddess protect her children from her stupidity!
ANY FUCKIN' WAY!....Super glad to hear about Sweetie's job situation as
well as the outpatient options for you! Good thing you've got the
Goddess watching over you or you'd be crazy! Onto the altar those
poor sweet babies go! Love to you and Sweetie XXXOOO D

======================
Date: Fri, 10 Oct 2003 06:11:56 -0700 (PDT)
From: E
Subject: Re: The latest from Looney Xtal.
To: Dee

My thoughts exactly. Your note re: therapy and then watching the
dancers last night at Cafe Mundi stirred up my brain a bit and gave
me what I think is an Inspiration. I don't know if there are support
groups for kids so young, so I thought "Church". I am thinking I
could arrange to take the kids (or maybe just the 2 oldest) to church
and/or Sunday school one Sunday a month, at least. Not sure if Xtal
is still on her 'you may not see my children without supervision'
kick or what, but church is both healing for the children AND
something that will teach them more about right & wrong than they've
been learning at home, PLUS something that has built-
in 'supervision'. Obviously I'm not going to be doing or saying
anything evil and destructive in the house of God. Plus (and this
one's ugly), it's not a situation where she can coach the children to
get gifts/money/stuff out of me. I was thinking we could go to a few
different services and maybe even a kids' yoga class, just to expose
them to different kinds of spiritual practices & then if there's one
we really enjoy that can become our regular place. What do you
think? *hugs* Thanks so much for your prayers & love. Your strength
is inspirational to me. =E

1696Re: OH DEAR GHOD

[evile]

a
Oct. 13, 2003


Date: Sun, 12 Oct 2003 00:59:30 -0700 (PDT)
From: "D
Subject: Re: The latest from Looney Xtal.


Church would be a good thing. Also there should be a child support
group through Narc Anon if it's run like Alcoholic's Anon...kid's
yoga is also a great option too!
Blessings on you for thinking only of these kids and not being bitter
or spiteful. With someone like Xtal I'm sure it's difficult not to
want to chuck the lot and go on with life, especially since she has
used those kids to take advantage of you several times! Goddess
protect and preserve you!
D