What boundaries are, and are not.

Had an 'interesting' online conversation with a nice older lady who was having conflict with her husband's ex wife and adult children. She proposed training the ex and adult kids as if she was training dogs, which she is apparently an expert dog trainer, with an expert bestfriend who is an experienced expert in training all animals, including marine mammals. I and a few others absolutely could *not* get through to this lady that treating people as if they are animals to be trained is a poor idea. It was 'interesting' to say the least. Boundaries, in her mind, meant that she would say "no cursing in my home" and deliver appropriate punishments if the ex wife or adult children engaged in profanity.

I have struggled, and continue to struggle with appropriate setting and maintaining of boundaries. What I do understand of them, they are not a means of controlling others behavior. They are a means of protecting yourself.

I like what this website has to say about boundaries. The language is simple and easy to understand, but the concepts are very profound. http://www.angriesout.com/DatingAbuse.htm

( Error: Irreparable invalid markup in entry. Raw contents behind the cut. )