3668Potential drama on Thursday

[evile]

Oct. 19, 2005

 

 

foodies question
bramblekite
2005-10-17 05:46 pm
The nice Ararat lady emailed me and said there was a foodies dinner
at Ararat on Thursday the 20th, but she didn't say what time it
started or if reservations were required.

Do you have any info, since you're on all the cool kids' mailing
lists and all?

Thanks :)
=====================

Re: foodies question
terriblelynne
2005-10-17 05:59 pm
Like Foodies need an excuse to eat, drink and watch belly dancers.
We don't, but since we have one, let's get together in Ararat's
backyard next Thursday, October 20th from 7 – 10:00PM.

Here's the schedule.

Mezzes out on buffet at arrival
Hummus, baba ghanouj, maust museer, raw veggies and hot pita bread
Entrees served at 7:45PM
Veggie casserole, roasted lamb, beef stew, grilled veggies, persian
rice, hot tomato sauce, maust museer and hot pida bread
Desserts served after dinner buffet - baklava and choclava
Entertainment
Belly dancing by Yamina - 7:30ish
Belly dancing by Tashar - 8:30ish
Fire dancing by Tashar - 9:15ish
$15.00 - RSVP - a very nice thing

The last Ararat event was a beautiful evening. Remember Ararat is
lesbian owned and operated. Thank you Kelly for planning an amazing
menu and evening. I can't think of a better way to unite and
celebrate community.

Ararat
111 East North Loop
www.araratrestaurant.net

Thank you and good night,

Kitty
beatsagogo@aol.com (i _think_ that's the email to rsvp...lemme know
if it bounces)


============

Re: foodies question
bramblekite
2005-10-17 06:15 pm UTC (link)
OMG, how much do you RAWK!??

Thanks so much. I have email in to Karen at Ararat, too, so I hope
that between the two of 'em I'll get the RSVP in. (& hopefully I
don't have to be a pre-existing 'foodie' member? *worry*)

:)

Thaks very much!
=========================

Re: foodies question
terriblelyne
2005-10-18 01:14 am
Just be prepared to get hit on by girls, with it being a Foodies,
y'know.
===================

Re: foodies question
bramblekite
2005-10-18 04:15 am UTC
I'm sure I'll be horribly offended (kidding!! ;P)


===================

Re: foodies question
terriblelynne
2005-10-18 04:17 am UTC (link)
Well, I know you're not much for being hit on on general principle,
so, just letting you know it's meat-markety.

================

Re: foodies question
bramblekite
2005-10-18 04:25 am UTC
1) I'll be there right after Krav Maga, so I'll be wretched-looking
and

2) I'll be there with my pretty boy cousin, who got all the attention
at last Goddess Night there.

I'm sure I'll be fine :) I think I'm actually pretty clueless when it
comes to being hit on, only the most vulgar attempts actually get on
the radar. All the subtle stuff, I just kind of go "what a nice
person!" like a moron.

I was once told "you understand everything you see" ....which means I
don't see a lot of things. Which, really, is fine.

Now off to dreamland for this clueless puppy. :)
===========


Re: foodies question
terriblelynne
2005-10-19 12:03 am UTC
Yeah, but this is Foodies, meaning it's a lesbian event, and unless
someone thinks he's a girl, people kinda might be wondering why he's
there. And it also might go over quite badly if he approaches anyone.
Honest, I've never seen a guy at a Foodies, so you might want to
rethink that.

========================

REthinking
bramblekite
2005-10-19 11:52 am UTC
Hmm...go by myself after I've made a reservation for two, feel
uncomfortable & unhappy because everybody but me will be there with
at least 1 friend,

OR go with my cousin, a person whose company I always enjoy, someone
I always have fun with and possibly face the disapproving glares of
strangers whose best response would have been ignoring me [edit:
added but not posted in her LJ: or hitting on me disgustingly],
ANYWAY?

Gee, what to do, what to do?

•  

Comments

[evile]

3669Re: Potential drama on Thursday



E
Oct. 19, 2005


good lord. Such drama from the little faux-lesbian. ("no, really, I
prefer women, it's just that men fall at my feet and so I just have
to be sleeping with a couple of 'em"...what.ever.)

I'm hoping that if it is a problem, the people at the front will let
me know in a non-drama-producing way. And if they make drama, it will
be sad, but that's life. Nobody said it was 'girls only' anywhere.


============

Re: REthinking
terriblelynne
2005-10-19 01:53 pm UTC (link)
So, most of the Goddess Nites are just plain Ararat Goddess Nights,
put on by the restaurant as an interesting and crowd-getting event.

Foodies is an event put on by a lesbian to create a space for
lesbians to meet other lesbians.

I wanted to try to compare it to bringing a guy to Bitches Night
versus bringing him to Bitches and Consorts night, but that's not
even the right analogy.

But sort of it is. They have the right to make it be a lesbian only
night just as much as we have the right to have girls only nights.
And just like when we just invite the "girls who can see this post"
to girls night, pretty much only queer women get invites to Foodies.
Otherwise it'd have been easier for you to find the information
without asking someone who's on their mailing list, you know? (And I
know you got the email from the restuarant owner as well, but she's
probably assuming a bit about her female demographic).

That's my only point here.

[evile]

E
Oct. 19, 2005


Re: REthinking
bramblekite
2005-10-19 02:17 pm
OK. Point taken.

I guess I'm seeing it more as a "bringing your kid to a show" type
situation. Which, while frowned upon in many circles, is pretty
common as far as I've seen around Austin. (Heck, I saw 2nd graders at
the last Bindlestiff Family Cirkus show. Personally, *I* would not
care to have my own children exposed to balloon BDSM or plate
spinning with your snooch, but that's just the barren hag talking)

B. is outgoing and friendly, and he's a CHILD. So I just don't see
him in the context of 'oppressor penis' or whatever.

I'm assuming that if it's an actual problem, the people at the gate
will let us know in a friendly, non-drama kind of way, but I am
betting it will be just fine.
========================

[evile]

3670Re: Potential drama on Thursday



====================

Re: REthinking
tterriblelynne
2005-10-19 02:32 pm
And, you know, I totally don't think that way. I don't _get_ the
whole gender separation thing or the assumed discomfort around men.
(Which probably says a lot to why I seem to give off straight-dar and
have always had a hard time meeting women).

Goddess Nites ARE generally mixed gender and family tolerant-if-not-
friendly, and if it weren't Foodies night I'd not bat an eyelash.

I'm not one of them, but I know a lot of other lesbians who are very
uncomfortable even around harmless-seeming men, and I guess that's
why having these events are so important to them. Personally, I went
to try to find someone to date, and that just seemed to be where they
were keeping all the women at the time.

My worst-case-scenario-phobia was/is a bunch of women freaking some
guy(even a kid-like one) showed up to a Foodies and
putting "warnings" up on Craiglist. It's not your fault that people
can be that stupid, but it's taken Kitty so much hard work to
constantly convince large groups of women to come out and socialize
in a town where there really aren't any other outlets for that, and
I'd hate to see the success of her event threatened in any way.

I sinceerely hope that I'm underestimating people, and that it does
go smoothly.

[evile]

=======

What I'd like to say...but I won't. I'm ending it here and now,
because I can bet that if there's drama, it will be stirred by HER
posting to the foodies list that a MAN will be invading their sacred
space.:
======================

Well, it was not presented to me as an adults only, women only, or
lesbians only gathering, so I am going.

I want to go, I don't want to go by myself, nobody else wants to go
with me. He likes bellydancing and fire, too, he's good company, and
if somebody wants to get into a tizz because he's a child with a
penis, well goddess help her. A tangential thought: if one of these
male-hating lesbos ever has male offspring, would she yank it out and
kill it immediately? Or would she be saying, as I am: "But this one
is MINE, and he's not like the rest of them!" :P

[evile]

3673Re: Potential drama on Thursday



E
Oct. 19, 2005


I'm having some wierdness with a friend over my plans for Thursday.
[Cousin B] and I went to a 'goddess night' at this restaurant called Ararat.
Apparently, several times a year, they have a big bellydance, music,
fire, etc. show out in their back patio/garden. I emailed them to ask
when the next one was going to be, figuring it would be around
Halloween-time or Day of the Dead. I got email back about all the
events for the rest of October, including a middle eastern buffet &
bellydance & fire show on Thursday. I RSVP'd for it, [Cousin B] and I will
head over there after Krav Maga tomorrow. My friend, who professes to
be a lesbian, but dates 2 men at the moment, and apparently doesn't
know how to pick up women or how to tell if a woman is hitting on
her, told me it would be incredibly bad form to take [Cousin B] to this
event because it's supposed to be lesbians only. Well...the lady who
wrote me didn't say 'adults only' or 'women only' or 'lesbians
only'...so I'm going. And if people want to get all pissy about it,
so be it. I'm figuring nobody is going to turn away my money and my
business. I just really dont' see this as me inflicting "male
oppressor penis" on a peaceful Womyns Gathyring, I see this as me
taking a kid to a performance. If people want to get freaked because
he's a male kid, goddess help them if they ever have male children of
their own...would they just kill them at birth, or what? Jeezus.

She apparently thinks that hysterical womyn will be posting all over
the interent and telling their friends to NEVER attend an event at
Ararat ever again because the owners cant' be trusted to create
female-only space, or someshit. Well, honey, lesbians don't tip
anyway, so I'm sure the owners won't cry too hard if some hysterical
man-haters dont' show up any more.

Oh, and she finished up her diatribe with "I hope everything works
out" when it seemed pretty obvious to me that she wants to be in on
the drama and isn't above creating it if it doesn't happen on its
own. I hate that. some 'friend' eh?

*shaking head* The crazy, it burns!

[evile]

3675Re: Potential drama on Thursday



E
Oct. 19, 2005


Re: REthinking
bramblekite
2005-10-19 06:07 pm UTC
last time I waited around at home for freinds to find/make time for me,
I had no life, and eventually found I had no actual friends.

Not gonna do that again. Life is too damn short.

[evile]

3676Re: Potential drama on Thursday



E
Oct. 19, 2005


Re: REthinking
terriblelynne
2005-10-19 06:58 pm UTC (link)
My schedule stays as packed as it does because people ask me to do
stuff and I say yes, or I ask them to do stuff and they say yes, and
either way we make a date. I don't have the power to leave my own
home without help. That is depressing and frightening, so I overbook
the hell out of myself so that I am gone so much I don't notice.
Sometimes it works out that my free days overlap with other people's
free days who I haven't already made plans with, and sometimes it
doesn't.

I do make girls' night one of my priorities whenever I can.
Occasionally I feel like I'm a PITA because I always need a ride, or
because part of the night's activity isn't something I'm able to do,
so what to do with me while that's happening, etc. So, some nights I
remove myself from the equation, or just let it go and don't take it
personally if no one offers to drive out to BFE to get me so I can
come along. I'd rather do it that way than wear out my welcome.

That being said, one of the biggest reasons I go at all is to spend
time with you. I like you and I like to do things with you. I look
whenever you post your schedule, and if we had overlapping,
unaccounted-for time (which is mightily rare), I'd happily ask you to
do something then.

All I was doing was saying, "hey, we have another common set of
interests; I'd do that with you sometime if you wanted." I know you
and I haven't had tons of one-on-one time together, and I've always
felt that was much more logistical than anything else. I'm sorry if
it's come across any other way.

Or maybe now I'm taking that statement too personally. I don't know.

[evile]

Re: REthinking
bramblekite
2005-10-19 07:11 pm

I'm sorry. I did not mean to seem as if I was attacking you. It's
just leftover baggage from me having nothing but 1-2 shitty 'friends'
for so long before I met The Bitches...

I got tired of being alone all the time, I hated going places and
being by myself and having people ignore me or give me dirty looks or
whatever...and I am just not going to do that to myself anymore,
that's all.

Staying busy is good. And you've touched on the major reason I post
my schedule--I'd *like* more people to see it and say "hey, you have
free time X night, would you like to do 1-on-1 thing with me?"...that
doesn't happen very often and it feeds all my old bad friend issues
(I think things like: 'people don't like me for me, they just like my
group of people and tolerate me as a condition of hanging with them,'
and 'everything I enjoy doing is boring and stupid, it must be or
someone would want to do it with me') but I keep on pluggin' away.
More hits than misses these days, but still old hurts take a long
time to go away.

Sorry for the crossed wires here. I'm not trying to hurt your
feelings or make you feel bad.