evile

Yes they do. Because you’ve seen behind the curtain of the Great and Wonderful ME! Show and you know how truly weak, disordered, and pathetic they are.

The discard, or the time of leaving a narcissist is the most dangerous time for their targets. Narcissist has been talking bad about you behind your back[1] since they first got with you. Their friends and (maybe*) family think you’re a jerk, a flake, and maybe worse. Everything bad the narc has done or even thought while they were with you, they’ve told their friends, fans, and flying monkeys that it was YOU who did and said those things.

End result: when you leave the narc, or when the narc throws you out, everyone the narc knows has been poisoned against you. They won’t trust you, they won’t believe you, and they won’t be likely to help you.

BUT, at the same time, if you have receipts, recordings, written documentation, or any other concrete items that can prove that the narc is lying, and IF you can get anyone to read, see, listen to, or believe those things, then the narc knows their whole empire of cards is going to start falling.

Either way, the narc will feel threatened and do everything they can to discredit and destroy you in every way that they possibly can. They are fearful and cowardly creatures but they are also very dangerous because of their circle of flying monkeys that they keep agitated and encourage to be vicious on their behalf, and they also have such a distorted sense of things that they will not take a proportionate and ‘fair’ view of what is owed to them or how far they can or should go to get their revenge on you (for leaving, for allowing them to throw you away, for trying to tell the truth about what really happened in the relationship)

Do what you can to minimize the person’s influence in your life, prepare for gossip and smear campaigns, and whatever you do, do not let the narc see or hear that you are affected by their behavior, or in any way afraid of them. This is why No Contact is important, and this is why it’s also important to lock down your social media, etc. after a discard or an escape. The stronger and more ‘large and in charge’ you can appear (and BE!) in your life, the more afraid they will be and the less they will try to get away with doing to you. Laughing in the face of gossips, snoops, moles, and flying monkeys will also help a lot. Just laugh and change the subject. “Oh, that crazy bitch is at it again, haha. Anyway, how have you been?”

* the reason I put a * and a ‘maybe’ next to my statement about the narc’s family is that the narc’s family of origin may be as hellish as the narc him or herself. She or he may have been raised by narcissistic abusers as bad or worse than them. So, if you are in touch with his/her family, they may just target you for more abuse if you go to them with any bad stories about the narc. On the other hand, if they are aware of the narc’s mental illness, they may believe you over their own blood family. Either way, I don’t advise that you keep contact with anyone who knew the narc before they knew you. In the event of a discard or an escape from a narcissist, I advise trying to restore ties to everyone the narc made you abandon or forced you to discard. They will more than likely be your best allies in the coming days.

Footnotes

[1]

Smear campaign - Wikipedia

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