evile

Not necessarily. Do you consider yourself a flying monkey?

Narcissists are master manipulators; everyone they meet gets a version of the narcissist that the narc has somehow decided will be most effective at getting what they want from that person. The narc is very adept at picking up visual, verbal, and even emotional/empathetic cues from others. These skills are essential in how they camouflage themselves in order to prey on others. So, you may get the ‘independent sassy business owner’ charade while another target gets the ‘wounded sensitive soul’ act. They will tell stories (or lies) about themselves and about their other targets in order to make the targets distrust one another and only see the narc’s version of events as The Truth.

Then, whatever conflict takes place between the targets becomes the narcissist’s fuel (supply), and whatever harm or drama takes place becomes another story for the predator to tell to yet another potential target or source of supply. They are forever setting people in their world against one another to watch the conflict and enjoy the chaos.

The narcissist is the star and the director of their giant soap opera, “The Great And Wonderful ME! Show” and it never, ever ends. While the other person (or persons) in the narc’s life may be fully onboard as an evil henchman, or flying monkey, they may also just be an innocent dupe, as you are (or were). Chances are, the narcissist will have engineered things so that none of their targets will speak to one another due to all the lies and mistrust that have been created by the narc. The narc doesn’t want you to compare notes, figure out the truth, and possibly gang up against him/her, or leave. They are excellent at compartmentalizing different parts of their lives, and covering their tracks.

You are under absolutely no obligation to stay and figure out the other people in the narcissist’s life, nor are you under any obligation to save the narcissist or protect them from the consequences of their own behavior. As soon as you realize you are dealing with a narcissist (predator, user, abuser, etc.), the only way out is to roll the credits for your part in the show, take your bow and exit stage left.

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