evile

Pretty common, I would think. Many people seem to develop a high degree of empathy due to being raised in a dysfunctional or unsafe family of origin. Being able to pick up on the most subtle clues regarding another person’s intentions, thoughts, and feelings is a matter of survival in a household where the care-giver adults are unstable or abusive—the young empath learns when to hide, when to appease, and what ‘mask’ to wear in order to keep themselves relatively safe and get their needs met in an unsafe environment.

These coping skills are refined and honed into adulthood, where they are used in workplace relationships, personal relationships, and romantic relationships. The empath learned at a young age that making direct requests, open statements of needs, or any other type of honesty would only get them teased, ridiculed, beaten, or ignored, so they figured out how to get their needs met with manipulation tactics. This indirect and manipulative way of relating to others can also be called ‘codependency,’

I think it is very, very common. Especially among women, who are socialized to be indirect and oblique in their communication, while direct statements and questions are viewed as ‘rude’ coming from a female.

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