2228 Bday card from P

[evile]

May 28, 2004

 

 

me on LJ
evile  wrote,
@ 2004-05-28 22:05:00

Current mood: bitchy

Enough with the bday guilt tripping bullshit, 'kay?
I think there needs to be a separate day that ISN'T my birthday for
people to lay guilt trips and tell me I'm fat and whatever else.
How 'bout October 5? That work for you?

Okay, I'm declaring October 5 "Be sure and tell E what a fat fucking
cunt she is!" Day. And leave my birthday HAPPY, 'kay? Please?

I ran into an old friend/lover after work today--he was waiting for
his wife to pick him up. We chatted a bit and then he said he had my
bday card, so he rooted around in his bag & found his 'non work'
folder (labeled as such) and gave me a card. 8 days after my bday
this is, mind you.

On the front, a picture of a 3-tier cake with one candle a fork stuck
in it. Printed: "On your birthday, remember...time is an illusion."

on the inside, the pre printed message says "Cake is real. Have a
great one!"

Signed by both husband and wife (2 different handwritings, I'm
impressed)

On the inside front facing the message, old friend has printed in
blue pen different from the black he used for his signature:

"E, We've grown apart these last few years and I would like to start
changing that trend. Good friends are too few and far between to let
drift away".


---
Talk about your total mixed message. yes, it's urgent that we become
close again, but not so urgent that the card actually be given or
sent on my birthday. He waited until 8 days after my birthday. He
knows my physical addresses. He knows my email at home and at work.
So would it have killed him to deliver this heartfelt message of
reunion-wishing ON MY ACTUAL FUCKING BIRTHDAY?!?

My guess, and truly, I am going to Hell for thinking it, is that he &
wife signed it together, and then he wrote that last bit afterwards.
Probably getting a little tired of fucking the wife & wanting a
little action from sleazy single slutty ol' me. (ie: the "Me" I was
about 10 years ago) Well...sorry. I hang with pagans, polys and
perverts and I am all for whatever consenting adults wanna do among
themselves, but as for me personally, I don't open my legs for
anybody but my Sweetie. And I certainly wouldn't give it up for
married men (and didn't do married people even when I was still the
Evile of Legend, as a matter of fact!)

I am feeling tremendously bad about myself. Stupid stupid.

Fuck the past. I don't owe it anything. And I don't owe you anything
just because we used to be friends and we used to fuck. It was
totally his choice to bag that babe and make a life with her and
ignore my efforts at continuing the friendship way-back-when, so I
don't owe him Jack Shit now. Or ever. To have a friend, you have to
BE a friend, and goddamn it he quit being my friend long before I
finally gave him up and broke away another little piece of my
goddamned heart. All I have in there anymore is crumbs because of him
and all my other lovely 'friends' who dumped me when I didn't fit
conveniently into their lives anymore. Fuck 'em.
================
me to J-Law:

Date: Fri, 28 May 2004 20:09:35 -0700 (PDT)
From: "evilE"
Subject: talk about your mixed messages
To: "J-Law"

I know you're on vacation, and I won't be marshing
your mellow with Kevin over this...but my feelings are
hurt & I need to vent, so here I am, writing to you.

I ran into P after work today--he was waiting for
S to pick him up. We chatted a bit and then he
said he had my bday card, so he rooted around in his
bag & found his 'non work' folder (labeled as such)
and gave me a card. 8 days after my bday this is, mind
you.

On the front, a picture of a 3-tier cake with one
candle a fork stuck in it. Printed: On your birthday,
remember...time is an illusion.

on the inside, the pre printed message says "Cake is
real. Have a great one!"

Signed by both Sonya & Pat (2 different handwritings,
I'm impressed)

On the inside front facing the message, Pat has
printed in blue pen different from the black he used
for his signature:

"evilE, We've grown apart these last few years and I
would like to start changing that trend. Good friends
are too few and far between to let drift away".


---
8 days after my birthday. He knows my physical
addresses. He knows my email at home and at work. So
would it have killed him to deliver this heartfelt
message of reunion-wishing ON MY ACTUAL FUCKING
BIRTHDAY?!?

My guess, and truly, I am going to Hell for thinking
it, is that he & S signed it together, and then he
wrote that last bit afterwards. Probably getting a
little tired of fucking the wife & wanting a little
action from sleazy single slutty ol' me. Well...sorry.
I hang with pagans polys and perverts but I don't open
my legs for anybody but Sweetie...

:(

I think there needs to be a separate day that ISN'T my
birthday for people to lay guilt trips and tell me I'm
fat and looking like shit.


==
a ps sent to J-Law:

I feel sort of the same way I did that horrible time we went to
Dallas and spent the night at Tex's and I went and had sex w/ him
even though he'd been a complete ass the entire night and then booted
me out of his bed immediately. :(

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