evile

Will narc get tired of copying You if they can’t compete with your creativity? For example if you are really good at cooking and they are incapable of being creative will they give up or they just do this in purpose to upset you?

If a narcissist cannot copy you, exceed you, or take credit for your efforts, they will eventually begin to devalue your talents, skills, and abilities.

As an example, the fact that I had a 20+ year career with a state agency and my narc in-law couldn’t hold a job for more than a few months. At first my narc in-law wanted me to get them in with my agency, or help them find a stable full time state job. When they finally did get in with a state agency, they couldn’t adapt to the culture or learn agency policies and procedures. The Narc made outlandish demands about changing their work schedule and lunch hour almost immediately, didn’t want to learn how things were done & told everyone that their way was better….and didn’t make it out of the probationary period as a result of their demanding, arrogant, irresponsible behavior.

So once it became obvious that my narc in-law wasn’t suited or capable of full time permanent responsible employment, they decided they were an ‘independent business person’ and an ‘entrepreneur’ and started to make ugly comments about myself and their own long-term-employed spouse as ‘dull wage slaves’ and ‘losers’ who had no creativity, no entrepreneurial spirit, no ability to ‘make it’ on our own….never mind that my narc in-law basically took my ‘wage slave’ sibling’s paycheck and used it to bankroll their ‘successful independent business’.

Once that devalue has happened in the narc’s mind, there is nothing I or the spouse could do or say to redeem ourselves in the narc’s eyes or make the narc acknowledge the value of our accomplishments. Even as the narc sucks up their spouse’s earnings and takes advantage of the full benefits afforded by their long term gainful employment, the narc has nothing but contempt for the ‘wage slave’ who isn’t out “wowing” the world with narcissistic bullshit, showing off, traveling and wining and dining themselves and new supply, all on the ‘wage slave’s dime.

Bottom line: you can’t allow yourself to be used by other people and you can’t care more about what other people think of you than you care about what you think of yourself. If you have skills and talents that make you happy, that’s what is important. If you use your skills and talents in ways that help other people and make other people happy & grateful, that’s a bonus. Take pride in your accomplishments and don’t let other people take credit for your hard work.

And if one person (the Narc) out of the DOZENS or HUNDREDS of people you know and interact with starts trying to put you down, call you names, or devalue your talents, skills, abilities….that is them trying to make themselves look and feel better by making you feel and look bad. Don’t fall for that nonsense. If you are a person you can look in the eye and feel proud of, that is all you need in this life. Don’t chase the approval or attention of crazy people and don’t bother competing with them. Like playing chess with a chicken….they’ll just mess up the pieces, poop on the board and crow that they won. Not worth your time or effort.

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