Dec. 9th, 2004

evile: (clutter)

    Dec. 9, 2004

     

     

    From: "Skye DreamSinger" 
    To: evilE 
    Subject: Forward: For your review - Agreements (Rules)
    Date: Thu, 09 Dec 2004 17:18:48 +0000

    I thought it was time to put these in writing as specifically as
    possible. Let me know what you think:

    Agreements (Rules)
    1. Openness and Honesty - Communicate, Communicate, Communicate
    Complete Disclosure. No secrets. Total honesty regarding our
    emotional involvements. Each must inform the other BEFORE NOT AFTER
    we have a sexual encounter. Sex is not just penetration. See below
    Definition and Rules of Lower Risk Sex Play.
    Have each other's consent.
    Never use pressure to get consent.
    Be clear with each other about what you want to do and don't want to
    do.
    2. Protection from physical and emotional harm
    Guard against unintended pregnancy and sexually transmitted
    infection -- IMPORTANT: no body-fluid exchanges outside of the
    Family, without the Family's prior consent.
    Accept responsibility for your actions. The Definition of and Rules
    for Safer Sex are below.

    3. The Family and our Home are sacred
    Treat each other as equals.
    Be attentive to each other's pleasure.
    Respect each other's limits.
    Relationships outside the Family must never take resources (time,
    money or otherwise) away from the Family; Family always comes first.
    Relationships outside the Family do not come into the Family's Home
    without the prior consent of the Family.
    To become part of the Family: All members of the Family, including
    the Children, have met and accept this prospective addition.

    DEFINITION AND RULES OF SAFER SEX:
    (taken from: http://www.plannedparenthood.org/sti/sex-safer.htm)
    Three Steps to Safer Sex
    Become honest with ourselves about the risks we take.
    Decide which risks we are willing to take — and which ones we aren't
    willing to take.
    Find ways to make our sex play as safe and satisfying as possible.
    The most important ways to reduce your risk are
    Keep your partner's body fluids out of your body — vagina, anus, or
    mouth. The body — fluids to be most careful about are blood, cum, pre-
    cum, vaginal fluids, and the discharge from sores caused by sexually
    transmitted infections.
    Don't touch sores or growths that are caused by sexually transmitted
    infections.
    Safer sex also means protecting your partner.
    Don't allow your body fluids to get into your partner's body.
    Don't have sex if you have sores or other symptoms of infection.
    Have routine checkups for infections.
    Get the correct treatment if you become infected.
    How Infections Get Passed Along
    Not all sexually transmitted infections are transmitted the same way.
    Here are the basics about how infections can be passed through sex
    play:
    Unprotected vaginal or anal intercourse — high risk for

    trichomoniasis
    gonorrhea
    chlamydia
    syphilis
    chancroid
    pubic lice
    scabies
    hepatitis B virus (HBV)
    cytomegalovirus (CMV)
    human papilloma viruses (HPVs)

    some HPVs can cause genital warts
    some can cause cancer
    herpes simplex virus (HSV)
    can cause oral and genital herpes
    pelvic inflammatory disease (PID)
    can cause sterility
    human immunodeficiency virus (HIV)
    can cause AIDS
    Unprotected oral sex — high risk for
    gonorrhea
    syphilis
    chancroid
    HSV
    HBV
    CMV
    Sex play without sexual intercourse — risk for
    HSV
    CMV
    HPV
    pubic lice
    scabies
    Lots of other diseases, from the flu to mononucleosis, can also be
    transmitted during sex play.
    Unprotected vaginal and anal intercourse have the highest risks for
    the most dangerous sexually transmitted infections.
    Lower-risk sex play includes
    masturbation
    mutual masturbation
    erotic massage
    body rubbing
    cybersex
    kissing
    deep kissing
    oral sex
    vaginal intercourse with a male or female condom
    anal intercourse with a male or female condom
    Outercourse
    For some people, outercourse is sex play without vaginal intercourse.
    For others, it is sex play with no penetration at all — oral, anal,
    or vaginal. Some people also believe that any kind of penetrative sex
    play is too risky to be called "safer sex." But many people do have
    oral and anal sex — sometimes to avoid pregnancy or to "preserve
    their virginity" — so we include them here.
    Outercourse — Alternatives to Intercourse
    Kissing — Many people explore different ways of kissing. They may
    also explore kissing different body parts.
    Masturbation — Many people enjoy masturbating — touching their own
    sex organs for pleasure. It's the most common way we are sexual.
    Partners can masturbate alone or together.

    Erotic Massage — Many couples touch and rub each other's sex organs
    with their hands, bodies, or mouths.
    Body-to-body Rubbing/Frottage — Many couples rub their bodies
    together — especially their sex organs — for pleasure and orgasm.
    Fantasy — Couples can read or watch sexy stories or pictures
    together. It can also be exciting to share sexy fantasies. People do
    it in person, on the phone or Internet, or through e-mail.
    Sex Toys — Vibrators, dildos, and other toys can be used to explore
    and caress the body. Condoms need to be used if partners share the
    same toy. Follow the cleaning instructions that come with toys.
    Oral Sex Play — Many people like to use their mouths on each other's
    sex organs. On a woman it is called cunnilingus. On a man, it's
    called fellatio. It cannot cause pregnancy. But it can
    pass infection. Latex or plastic barriers reduce the risks.
    Anal Sex Play — Many people enjoy exploring each other's buttocks,
    anus, or rectum with their hands, mouths, sex organs, or with toys.
    Anal sex play cannot cause pregnancy — but it can easily pass
    infection. Latex or plastic barriers reduce the risks.
    Condoms
    Condoms are the best protection when enjoying sexual intercourse.
    Condoms help make sex last longer. Condoms help prevent premature
    ejaculation.
    Latex and female condoms reduce the risk of
    vaginitis caused by trichomoniasis
    chlamydia
    syphilis
    PID
    chancroid
    gonorrhea
    HIV/AIDS
    Latex and female condoms may offer more limited protection against
    bacterial vaginosis
    CMV
    genital warts
    herpes
    hepatitis B
    cervical cancer
    But do not use male and female condoms together.
    The Female Condom
    stays in place even if a guy loses his erection
    has an external ring that may stimulate the clitoris
    can be used for anal sex
    can be used by people who are allergic to latex
    Follow the instructions on the package insert to learn how to use
    condoms.
    Benedizioni chiari e scuri,
    Skye DreamSinger
    *********
    May the Road rise to meet you,
    May the Wind be always at your back,
    May the Sun shine warmly on your face,
    May the Rain fall softly on your fields,
    Until we meet again, may the Lady hold you always in the palm of Her
    hand.

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