evile | Oct. 8th, 2003

Oct. 8th, 2003

Oct. 8, 2003

The Simple Reason We're Fat!

by John McGran
eDiets Editor-in-Chief

Yes, yes... I know FAT is a button-pushing word. However, please keep
in mind: fat is by no measure a 4-letter word. So let's stop
empowering the word and allowing it to make us feel uncomfortable,
angry and ashamed.

It's a sad fact that 6 out of every 10 Americans are overweight or
obese. Despite losing 25 pounds over the past three months with the
Atkins Nutritional Approach, I remain fat. Sure, I am a lot better
off than I was when I started my low-carb lifestyle -- and I do
intend to drop the other 15-20 pounds weighing me down mentally and
physically -- but at 5"7" and 199 pounds, I remain pleasantly
plump... big-boned... "healthy"... or whatever phrase you may want to
use to replace the word fat.

OK, before I go any further, I feel the need to stress: it's not my
intent to preach, lecture or belittle. I simply want you and I to
accept our situation so we can react and slim down to a healthier
weight.

So what is the real reason we're fat? In plain words: it's because we
eat too much and we're lazy. Ouch... hurts I know. But think about
it. Mr. Bad Food had discussed supersized portions time and again.
And I know firsthand, it's far too easy to blow off a workout than it
is to actually find time for one!

If I had stuck to my workout program -- 3 days of treadmill, 3 days
of Soloflex "weight" training -- I would probably be at or near my
goal weight. It pains me to admit this, but I have been OFF the
program more than ON during my three months of dieting.

I'm sure many of you can relate. Get me down the basement stairs and
there's a darn good chance I'll finish my workout. However, offer me
the slightest excuse -- out of town on business... at the Fair... on
vacation... I'm too tired!... -- and it's bye-bye sweat and fitness,
hello couch and TV.

A few weeks ago I had the pleasure of chewing the fat with Stewart
Smith. You probably don't know Stew from Adam, so I'm gonna tell you
a little about this man whose life revolves around fitness... top-
notch fitness... the kind of fitness that can mean life or death.

The personal trainer/author is a former Navy SEAL. He's also a guy
who likes an occasional beer. And he's here today to tell you how you
can have your beer (mixed drink or glass of wine, too) and keep a 6-
pack gut!

Stew bills himself as "the personal trainer to the heroes of
tomorrow." He blames the mushrooming plague of obesity on our overall
laziness.

"We're not adding exercise... and our food portions are way out of
whack," he notes.

"It's a simple equation: you don't exercise you're gonna gain weight."

What inspired Mr. Bad Food to give Stew a call, then a listen? It was
an eye-catching PR piece that proclaimed, "Keep Your Six-Pack... And
Drink It Too!"

I like my beer. I usually save it for Thursday night bowling or a
weekend sporting event, but there's rarely a week without beer for
Mr. Bad Food. After speaking to Stew, I no longer have a fear of
developing an unsightly beer belly (and no, it's not because I
already have one... ha ha).

Stew says, "I drink beer and you can see six of my abdominal muscles.
What most people call 'beer bellies' are actually 'inactivity
bellies.'"

So how can you have your beer and a toned belly too? Don't allow
yourself the treat until you've burned off the calories you intend to
consume.

For me, 30 minutes on the treadmill equals about 240 calories... and
240 calories just happens to equal a couple of regular beers. Opt for
the lighter choices and you can enjoy an extra can, bottle or draught!

"You don't have the honor of drinking a beer at the end of your day
unless you've exercised," Stew advises.

Stew has found a great outlet for his love of beer and exercise. He
was recently named national fitness director of the United States
Beer Drinking Team. OK, I hear you laughing. But the USBDT is an
honest-to-goodness organization. You can check it out at
www.usbdt.org. For more on Stew and his expert approach to great
fitness, go to StewSmith.com. Here you'll find a lot of inspirational
messaging and the secret to Stew's Beer & Barbells Workout. But be
warned: Stew's workouts are aimed more for the Serious Stans than
they are for the Couch Potato Petes among us.

Stew, who says he sports a 32-inch "beer belly," promises to serve up
a challenging workout that requires no pricey gym membership. Of
course that's exactly what we offer here at eDiets too. For a few
extra dollars a month, eDieters can add on our fitness program. And
let me tell you, eDiets chief fitness pro Raphael Calzadilla (a
former Mr. Connecticut who recently finished second in his class at a
New York drug-free bodybuilding championship) can personalize a
workout program that'll get you off the couch and on the road to
muscles in no time.

If you are already an eDiets member, click here to see what we have
to offer. Not an eDieter but interested in shaping up while you slim
down? Start today with a free diet profile.

The bottom line: YES, you can reward yourself with the occasional
beer or good treat, but NO, you cannot slim down and tone up if you
take in more calories than you work off.

Hey... Mr. Bad Food suddenly realized something. I've written this
column to psych myself into returning to a regular workout program
(devised by none other than Raphael himself) to kick-start my idling
weight loss program. Hopefully, I've helped you too find the
motivation you need to get back on track to the shape you want!

Thanks Stew... and thank you, the readers, for inspiring me to fight
the good fight! I'll never be a Navy SEAL, but I did get to watch the
trained seals at Sea World this past weekend. :o)

NUTTY NEWS!

Headline: Caffeinated sausage to keep beer drinkers awake!

Meat of the story: Visitors to Germany's famous October Beer Festival
will be kept awake this year with the help of a power sausage --
called the Breaker -- stuffed with caffeine.

"The Breaker sausage picks you up like an espresso," says butcher
Johann Drexel, inventor of the juiced-up sausage that contains 10
percent fat, vitamins B1 and B6 as well as caffeine and taurine. The
article notes that caffeine stimulates circulation, while taurine
allows to body to absorb it faster.

Man, if that isn't just what the world needs more of: wide-awake
drunks who can gobble a few sausages then stick around to suck up a
couple more cold ones before heading for home!

READER FEEDBACK

In response to a recent column -- Comfort & Joy: My Top 10 Diet
Foods!, Sue A. Cox writes: I make up 12 small (half-cup) servings of
sugar-free JELL-O in different flavors in reusable plastic containers
each week. I pack these with our low-calorie lunches as my "sweet
treat." Satisfies my need for something tasty, smooth and creamy and
sweet. The cost is low and only takes 15 minutes to do enough for the
week for hubby and me.

I loved your article Comfort & Joy: My Top 10 Diet Foods! I started
my Atkins way of life about 5 weeks ago and have already lost 21
pounds. Another 30-35 and I too will start the maintenance program.
Just wanted to throw a food your way though that I think is just
about the most perfect Atkins food there is... I don't know how
people go without pork rinds. LOL! Anyway there's the obvious: eating
pork rinds straight out of the bag. But there are so many other
things to do. Pork rinds topped with a little hot sauce is a great
snack, and another is pork rinds topped with melted butter, cinnamon
and Splenda. I know that sounds gross but you HAVE to try it before
making that assumption. I also powder pork rinds and use it as a
breading for anything: chicken, pork, fish and even deep-fried
veggies (like mushrooms and zucchini). It's even better breading if
you mix it with grated Parmesan cheese first. If you haven't tried
these things then your Atkins diet is really going to improve once
you do.
Scott R.

The Comfort & Joy: My Top 10 Diet Foods article was a lifesaver to
me! Diet A&W root beer with a little heavy cream stops my craving for
ice cream and for something sweet! It tastes great! I will try Diet
Slice next to mimic a Creamsicle. Russell Stover's low-carb pecan
patties are so good. When I am eating them I savor the flavor and
can't believe they taste as good as a real "turtle" but without the
guilt. I love to crunch and another one of my FAVORITES is the "fried
cheese" from Michelle. I have made and served these at parties and
they are a hit! This article has inspired me to create a cheesecake
that would be allowed on the Atkins diet. I'm on way to the grocery
store to pick up the ingredients right now! Thanks for the
inspiration, ideas and support. I look forward to your articles.
Since July I have lost 18.5 lbs.
Jane

Just an observation: I just returned from 2 weeks in a Central Asian
country. Many people walked where they were going. Food was plentiful
but no fast food at all. I saw exactly one fat person the entire time
I was there. That's no exaggeration. When I got off the plane in the
U.S. airport, it was full of fat people. Ummmm... I wonder what THAT
means?
Susan B.

I read your Weak Stomach? Don't Read This! article today and I
noticed an entry by someone named Stew C. who mentioned several
Chicago food items. Here's an excerpt: "The Original Chicago-style
Hot Dog: Take a good old Vienna beef dog and load it with a variety
of garden delights like tomatoes, relish, peppers, onions, ketchup
and mustard." I've lived in Chicago for 20+ years. There is no way
this Stew guy is from Chicago. I believe there is a law in the City
of Chicago that forbids ketchup on a real Chicago hot dog. There's a
place called SuperDawg that's been in Chicago for 50 years. According
to their website, a standard Chicago hot dog has: kosher pickle,
celery salt, mustard, onion and relish. And here is an excerpt from
the SuperDawg site: "A note about Chicago hot dogs: order ketchup and
prepare to be mocked by anyone present, including the folks taking
your money. When forced by traumatic circumstance to order a dog with
ketchup, most Chicagoans will loudly explain to anyone
listening 'sorry, they don't know any better.' On this point,
SuperDawg will cave in to the pressures of market capitalism by
offering ketchup packets (when pressed) but refusing to apply ketchup
to their product in any way." Sorry, I just had to set the record
straight!
Peg M.

Peg, you weren't the only one...

I have a problem with your article. A person wrote about Chicago-
style hot dogs and said that you put CATSUP on a CHICAGO-STYLE hot
dog!!! That is TOTALLY FORBIDDEN on ANY Chicago hot dog I have eaten,
and I LIVE in Chicago. Most places will LAUGH at you if you even ask
for catsup, even if you say you want it on your fries! The scientific
explanation for the no catsup thing is that the sweet taste of the
catsup cancels out the tart of the hot dog, so if you put catsup on
your hot dog you will taste nothing. I just thought you would like to
know.
Lisa B.

For a long while now I have been on a weight loss plan and have lost
about 130 pounds. One of my favorite things to eat is crunchy/salty
things, and sometimes that old air-popped corn just doesn't do it. So
here is my substitute: take about 4 regular-sized corn tortillas and
place them on a microwave-safe dinner plate and spray them with a
spritz of cooking spray. I like the garlic kind. Turn on the
microwave to high for one minute, rotate the plate a half turn, cook
one minute again, repeat. After two repeats, flip them and begin
again until the tortillas begin to turn brown. When they are still
warm, break the tortillas into chunks and dip into salsa. If you
desire, salt them while damp from the spray. This snack has saved me
from the high-fat 7-Eleven midnight runs a few times!
Tammy

Well, until next week, the fridge door is closed. But if you have any
questions and/or comments -- even a tasteful joke or story, a Hall of
Shame nominee, or a great recipe to share -- feel free to write me,
eDiets editor-in-chief John McGran, at john@ediets.com.

Are you ready to sink your teeth into a healthy new lifestyle... one
that will help you drop weight and improve your health? eDiets offers
a choice of 15 different diets, including the Atkins Nutritional
Approach, ZonePerfect and the Shape Up! Plan inspired by Dr. Phil
McGraw. To give us a try simply click here and fill out a free
profile.

Oct. 8, 2003

Well, assuming my health insurance is worth a shit, I
will soon be on the road to my endometrial ablation.

The meeting with my Dr. this morning went really well,
he didn't talk down to me or treat me like an idiot.

There will probably be a 2-part thing here: first
tubal sterilization via Essure (It's a 40 minute
procedure that you walk in & out of!) and then the
ablation in 3 months once they've verified that the
Essure worked.

OR, if my insurance co. won't cover Essure, they will
do the tubal ligation belly-button surgery AND the
ablation at the same time. Which will involve a longer
recovery time, but will essentially do the same thing
for me.

YAY!

Oct. 8, 2003

--- J-Law wrote:

Oh, you probably heard, but Davis is out, and Ahnuld
is in. What is the world coming to?

Good news: Lombardi Sports (a shop here in the
city) has a group run on Marina Green every Tuesday
at 6:30. Since I moved therapy to Saturdays, I
think I might do that. It's a nice walk (warm up!)
from here, or I could take the street car!

He [John] wasn't freaked with the "so, what were you thinking...."
question, so I think I am going to have to work out a way to get
my "direct" point across indirectly in a similar way. Shouldn't be
too hard. I am a lawyer (by training at least), after all. :)

Sounds like you & [Aunt L] had a good time last night. And I am very,
very proud of Sweetie and glad for both of you! That's just awesome!

Today is my first day of running at lunch. Very much looking forward
to it. I am just a bit tender from Pilates yesterday (I was really
into it), so now I am swaggering around a bit and saying, yeah,
Pilates TOTALLY works. :)

That Xtal shite is ridiculous. I don't know where she gets off.
Sounds almost stalker-like, like she is just gonna keep after you. I
don't think of pot as being "as bad" as other, supposedly harder
drugs. I think if you can handle it responsibly, as normal people
would with alcohol, then it's fine. But if you have kids, you
shouldn't do it at all. Or, if you do, don't do it in their presence.

[re ablation]

*hug* Best of luck!!!! We will have to have an "baby-free shower"
for you when it's all over.

:)

-------------------------------
me to Jen:

That's just *so* bizarre.

BUT, at least Arnold is liberal as far as being
pro-choice and pro gun-control, which makes him a
little better than your typical Republican. Kinda
scary that California with it's Democratic 45% of the
voting population managed to elect this guy...Life
Imitates that hideous movie with Wesley Snipes &
Sylvester Stallone. If Taco Bell becomes the only
restaurant and Pepsi the only drink, I'm jumping off
the Golden Gate Bridge.

I think it's great that you're finding a group to run
with--I know I always do better when I have at least
one person to work out with. Great chance to meet cute
guys & network, too :)

Woo! I am munching a mixture of bell & Hungarian wax
peppers and my mouth is on FIRE! One of my new diet
ideas is to put in as much spicy stuff as
possible--hot stuff is excellent for you AND it boosts
the metabolism a bit. Every little bit counts. Plus,
it's nice to have the sinuses clear out a bit!

I am not going to pick through and analyze everything
wrong with Xtal's last email. I'm just appalled at how
selfish and really CLUELESS she is. And while I'm sure
Miss Manners doesn't have a chapter on it, I think
it's horribly gauche to badmouth the woman who took
care of your kids while you were in the damn jail,
yaknow?

I am totally on Cloud 9 about the non-confrontational,
non-dramatic meeting with my Dr. this a.m. It was so
calm & smooth, and everything just fell into place.
*fingers crossed for insurance stuff*

XOXOXO!

=E

Oct. 8, 2003

Take It As It Comes
The Doors
Time to live
Time to lie
Time to laugh
Time to die
Takes it easy, baby
Take it as it comes
Don't move too fast
And you want your love to last
Oh, you've been movin' much too fast
Time to walk
Time to run
Time to aim your arrows
At the sun
Takes it easy, baby
Take it as it comes
Don't move too fast
And you want your love to last
Oh, you've been movin' much too fast
Go real slow
You like it more and more
Take it as it comes
Specialize in havin' fun
Takes it easy, baby
Take it as it comes
Don't move too fast
And you want your love to last
Oh, you've been movin' much too fast
Movin' much too fast
Movin' much too fast

Current Music: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MI_RVIl4ZsA

Oct. 8, 2003

J-Law:

Unfortunately, he is anti-gay. Opposes any and all gay rights
legislation. Luckily, the legislature passed a sweeping gay rights
bill while Davis was still in. It'll be nearly impossible to undo it
(and the other progressive stuff they passed at the same time) since
our liberal legislature will certainly block/override any
gubernatorial attempt to do so.

I'd like to do the spicy thing, too, but my stomach has been very
sensitive lately (even before the flu thang) so I am sticking to
pretty bland things these days. It's a drag. I've switched to tea
in the mornings, which helps. And it's cheaper. 6 bucks gets me 50
bags of my fave (Taylor's of Harrogate Irish Breakfast), as opposed
getting a small Peet's drip (only 4 of those for my 6 bucks).

I usually prefer to exercise alone. Except for you, every other
exercise buddy I have had has been a complete wash. Although, Jake
(work friend) and I might do well together, and the group dynamic at
Marina Green will probably be cool. But, since I haven't been that
motivated lately to go by myself, I think some variety & social
aspect will be good.

There are cute guys at Grace Cathedral, too, so I am all about
meeting guys in my newly-expanded horizons. They have an active 20s-
30s group - do all kinds of hikes and stuff. I bet there's some
runners among them, too.

I am very glad the Dr. thing is working out. That's probably more
than half the battle, given the previous Dr. crap you have had to
endure.

Xtal Xtal. She has issues. Major, major issues. Probably best not
to analyze her latest (or any future) missive(s). It'll only piss
you off. And it's not like she will ever see what the rest of us do.

I am in a pretty good mood, too. Not as high & stoked as yesterday
(a little more contemplative - sp?) but the run will probably get my
endorphins and alla that going.
-----
me:
Actually, now that I think of it, every other exercise
buddy I've attempted to have has turned out badly.
Even Sweetie. Not totally his fault--at the time, he was
working 10am-6 or 7pm, and by the time he'd
decompressed from work and was ready to hit the gym, I
was ready for bed.

You are the only good one. :)

Hopefully, this Arnold thing is a fluke & the voters
will come to their senses in the next election. What a
crazy mess.

I love Irish Breakfast tea, too. With lots of cream :)

Sweetie is looking into creating a block for any future
stuff from Xtal. Only bad thing about that is that it
will either make her pick a new email address to send
from OR cause her to actually pick up a phone or make
another of her 'numerous [fictional] attempts' to see
me & talk to me.

Anyhoo...back to the grindstone. I missed a bunch of
work this a.m. & I'm feeling guilty.

=========
J-Law:

Timing is probably the biggest factor for me. I tried working out in
the evenings, too. No dice; once I decompress from work, I just want
to stay home. I haven't tried lunches yet (until today - 1/2 hour
from now!) so we'll see how that goes. I hope well, because I don't
want to get up that much earlier in the mornings on general
principle, nor do I want to run in my neighborhood, in part because
it's dark, and also because there's just too much "stuff" around,
whether it's buildings, people, mailboxes, whatever. It doesn't feel
open enough, if that makes any sense.

I think on Sundays I am going to take Pepper to Chrissy Field so we
can run on the beach together. Have a nice long walk out there in
the morning, run, walk leisurely back. Would be good.

I ended up having 'almost' cream in my tea - for some reason, I
prefer low or nonfat milk in tea (in contrast to coffee, which I like
creamy). Anyway, all we had was whole milk, which didn't work for me
at all. I think I might just switch entirely to lemon. Buy one
lemon and I'll have slices for a week.

Interesting thought re: Xtal taking a leaf out of mass spammers'
books. She probably would switch addresses. But I doubt she has the
balls to actually call you. That defeats her purpose - she wants to
plague you with contact from her, and force you to contact her back -
putting the ball in your court every time. Moreover, she doesn't
have the balls to actually speak with you.
======================
me to J:

woo! I hope the lunchtime run works out for ya. I hate
being sticky & sweaty without being able to get a
shower.

I am with you on the after-work thing, though. I find
unless I just walk thru the door and pop in a video
*immediately*, it doesn't happen. If I sit down,
that's it, I'm done for the day.

I am going to work really hard on losing some weight &
getting in better shape before my surgery the 5th. :)
No crash dieting, or anything crazy, just a LOT more
exercise every day.

XO!

=E
=============
J-Law:

I am going to bring my Olay Daily Facials and a Bath & Body Works
mist thing. I figure I can hop v. quickly into the shower, do the
facial thing, mist after, and that'll be good.

If not, I'll just have to be sticky, because this is a good time, and
it's nice place to run.

I am gonna get serious, too. I've decided to write down what I eat
each day as well. Although I think I eat pretty well, I know
there's "hidden" bad things that I do without thinking, especially on
the portion control front.

I read somewhere (probably Shape) that eating better/less will help
you lose weight relatively easily (at least initially), but to keep
it off and/or lose more, you have to exercise like a demon. Very
interesting, and it struck me that this is definitely the case with
me. My big weight loss was almost effortless. I didn't even know I
was doing it. It's funny that now, since I've lost it and kept it
off, I am inspired to lose more, get toned, etc. and make the effort.

Good luck to you! We can keep each other motivated by email!