1439FTS.

 

 

 

May 27, 2003

 

 

I think online journaling needs to quit.

Got this from X:


From: X
To: E
Subject: not nastiness enclosed
Date: Mon, 26 May 2003 17:42:27 +0000

I am only writing to let you know that I had no idea that [husband] saw
your brother recently. I want you to know that I have not said
anything negative to anyone at all about you. I recieved a letter
from your mother, and am saddened to lose her too.

I am telling you again, that your assumptions about me were hurtful
and wrong. I did nothing to you, I did not put you in a compromising
position, and I did not use you. I wrote your mother back, I told her
my perspective.

[Husband], I can not control. He is irate. I am not sure what passed
between the two of you. I know that in my emails to you, and yours to
me, that we both expressed regret that we are no longer able to
connect. It was a long time coming.

But please don't write about myself and my family any more. Not
somewhere where other people may see it, and do know that you are
talking about me. It isn't fair. I am not doing anything like that. I
stepped back. I never sent the nasty letter I had drafted, because I
knew if I let time pass I would regret it. I don't think I am being
childish. As far as the kids go. I love my children more than
anything in the whole universe, and I have done an amazing job of
raising them. Iwould never take people they love away from
them, and I didn't know at the time that [husband] had made that ultimatum
to you. I have spoken to [husband] since then, and he agreed that it
wouldn't be fair to our children to keep them from you, but he
doesn't want them with you unsupervised. If you wish to see the kids
( and I hope you will someday), contact me through email.
Arrangements can be made in some adult manner.

I never told you that I cheated on my husband, I told you about a
crush I had on another man, I told you I was having trouble, I told
you [husband] was being difficult. You gave me no support, but plenty of
disdain, and chose to call me a liar and a cheat. [husband] and I are
married but we don't share the same brain. You accused me of lying
about [husband] reading your webpages. I hadn't read them with him, I
didn't think he ever had. I still don't think he ever did, but it
wouldn't shock me if he said he had.

i hope your bday was pleasant. I considered calling, instead I just
tried to send a good vibe your way, apparently itwasn't good enough,
because today I get an email from a mutual aquaintenace that you were
writng about my husband and me on one of your webpages. Please, E,
have some respect for me, after 33 yrs. and know that I am not
publicizing any nastiness about you.

Again, I have no idea what [husband] is saying. I am not his keeper.

-X
------------------------------
posted this in LJ, then deleted it:

Well...I had a lovely weekend. Enjoyed my cousin's visit. Enjoyed
faire. Enjoyed X2. Enjoyed spending time with my family, friends &
loved ones. Found this piece of garbage in my in box this evening.

You know what? I could give a shit about X and her drama and her
husband-problems. What irritates me is the 'acquaintance' who
so 'helpfully' pointed out that I was writing (about her? maybe? But
maybe not!) in my other diary.

Thanks alot, other friend. It's so kind of you to go stirring up
shit, that's a really friendly gesture. Oh so kind & friendly of you.
Like, if we were still in high school, maybe.

Guess what? it's MY FUCKING GODDAMNED DIARY and I will write whatever
the FUCKING GODDAMNED HELL I want to in it.

How's that work for ya, "friend"?

-------------
Sent this to J-Law:

I don't even know where to start with this hellacious
pile of dinosaur shit...

1. the 'mutual acquaintance' is a fucking moron &
should be horsewhipped--why go stirring up shit
between X and me because of something I wrote in my
diaryland diary (I used no names, BTW, so just let 'em
try & get me for libel/slander, fuckos) That is the
sort of thing high school 'friends' do to one another
to create drama, not the behavior of mature adults.

2. 'supervised' visits with the children? Like I'm
some kind of child molestor? I don't goddamned fucking
think so. I guess the [X family] wised up and realized
the gravy train wasn't running anymore & who would buy
their kids cool stuff & take them cool places if not
AuntE? Fuck that. Fuck them. They're the ones who
brought the kids into it, and crossed the line between
'fixable fight' and 'broken forever'

3. whatever. Just...fucking...whatever. I just want to
vomit all over her fucking hypocritical fat fucking
face for this bullshit of playing the wounded party
and "Oh, I can't control [husband], I don't know what [husband]
is doing or saying, poor me, poor kids, they love you,
manipulate, manipulate, guilt trip, bla bla."

---
and I thought of this one after the email to J-Law:

Okay, MA[X's husband] goes up to [brother A] and starts badmouthing me IN
PUBLIC, where anyone can just walk by and hear his slander, but
somehow *I'm* the bad guy for putting something in my diaryland
diary, with no full names attached & not only that, but you actually
have to intentionally search the web for my page, so it's not like
I'm standing in the middle of fucking Home Depot saying nasty shit
that any passing idiot (possibly a boss, coworker, or potential
employer? hmm?) could overhear.

FTS. First Sharjinka/jinx getting all bent out of shape because
she assumed one of my LJ entries was about her (it wasn't) and then
instead of asking, she wrote a big ol' angsty entry in her
LJ...stupid HS drama! And then this lovely 'mutual acquaintance' (Sweetie
thinks it's Pace) goes tattling off to X about something in my
d'land diary.

fuck those fucking people. I guess it's erikajournal yahoogroup from
here on in for any actual thoughts/feelings. I have to remember not
to mention Sweetie going out of town this week, so as not to have anyone
unwanted coming by the house because they know I'm home alone. Not a
good feeling at all.