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evileMonday, September 27, 2010 5:03 PM
From: "Lynn Melville" <lynnmelville@boomeranglove.com>
October is national Domestic Violence Awareness Month. Personally, I think it should be named Domestic Violence *Prevention* Month. However, since the DV organizations haven't been very successful with prevention, I guess *awareness* is step one.
I believe that if more people were aware of Borderline Personalty Disorder, we could begin to give abusers the treatment they need to stop the Cycle of Violence. If you're interested in research on this subject, check out the work of Dr. Donald Dutton. He's nailed it.
Be that as it may, the pyschologist who interviewed me earlier this month, Dr. Beth, is presenting 2 interviews today on this subject. One deals with attachment disorders (the root of the problems of many Borderlines *and* their partners). The second will address the common myth that only women are subjected to abuse and violence. Current Centers for Disease Control statistics state that 30 percent of DV incidents ar female to male.
Scroll down for info re the 2 interviews. Then send me your comments. The critical issues discussed in these interviews are causing enormous pain in our world.
Lynn Melville
“Our mother gives us our earliest
lessons in love – and its partner, hate.
Our father – our ‘second other’ –
elaborates on them.”
Judith Viorst, Necessary Losses
Dear Lynn,
How emotionally attached we were to our primary care giver in childhood has a dramatic impact on the adult intimate relationships we form.
If we were securely attached to our Mother, the better able we are to choose partners who were securely attached, thereby easily forming successful marriages.
Others who had anxious or avoidant attachments to their mother will tend to partner with those whose attachment styles either perpetuate their anxiety or be completely unavailable for intimacy.
In either instance, this will be uncomfortably familiar.
My first guest, Dr. Steve Olivas, studied attachment styles for his doctoral dissertation.
So I playfully constructed a game called “Stump the Doctor” in which he was to identify which of the three attachment styles was I discussing in a two-sentence description.
We had fun with it.
My next guest was a Psychology Professor whose primary research area is men who are physically and psychologically abused by their spouse.
It is a common misconception that domestic violence happens only to women.
However, men can also be victims of violence as well.
Be sure to tune in to these provocative conversations.
This show will be available today after noon Central on www.webtalkradio.net.
There is no need to set your clock.
This show will be available for the next week any time and then from the archives for the next 3 months.
Here’s the link: http:tinyurl.com/yzxnexy
Also, tomorrow, Tuesday, this same show will air on 1490 AM, WWPR in the Sarasota, Tampa, Bradenton area. Dedicate one button on your car radio to 1490 AM and listen to Dr. Beth during drive time.
Learn tools and techniques to ensure that your relationships are as good as they can be.
Dedicated to your health and happiness,
Dr. Beth
MELVILLE PUBLICATIONS
P. O. Box 2036
Santa Maria, CA 93457
melvillepublications@comcast.net
Ph: 888.248.6608
www.boomeranglove.com
www.stoptheabuseblog.com
www.stopmaleabuse.com
From: "Lynn Melville" <lynnmelville@boomeranglove.com>
October is national Domestic Violence Awareness Month. Personally, I think it should be named Domestic Violence *Prevention* Month. However, since the DV organizations haven't been very successful with prevention, I guess *awareness* is step one.
I believe that if more people were aware of Borderline Personalty Disorder, we could begin to give abusers the treatment they need to stop the Cycle of Violence. If you're interested in research on this subject, check out the work of Dr. Donald Dutton. He's nailed it.
Be that as it may, the pyschologist who interviewed me earlier this month, Dr. Beth, is presenting 2 interviews today on this subject. One deals with attachment disorders (the root of the problems of many Borderlines *and* their partners). The second will address the common myth that only women are subjected to abuse and violence. Current Centers for Disease Control statistics state that 30 percent of DV incidents ar female to male.
Scroll down for info re the 2 interviews. Then send me your comments. The critical issues discussed in these interviews are causing enormous pain in our world.
Lynn Melville
“Our mother gives us our earliest
lessons in love – and its partner, hate.
Our father – our ‘second other’ –
elaborates on them.”
Judith Viorst, Necessary Losses
Dear Lynn,
How emotionally attached we were to our primary care giver in childhood has a dramatic impact on the adult intimate relationships we form.
If we were securely attached to our Mother, the better able we are to choose partners who were securely attached, thereby easily forming successful marriages.
Others who had anxious or avoidant attachments to their mother will tend to partner with those whose attachment styles either perpetuate their anxiety or be completely unavailable for intimacy.
In either instance, this will be uncomfortably familiar.
My first guest, Dr. Steve Olivas, studied attachment styles for his doctoral dissertation.
So I playfully constructed a game called “Stump the Doctor” in which he was to identify which of the three attachment styles was I discussing in a two-sentence description.
We had fun with it.
My next guest was a Psychology Professor whose primary research area is men who are physically and psychologically abused by their spouse.
It is a common misconception that domestic violence happens only to women.
However, men can also be victims of violence as well.
Be sure to tune in to these provocative conversations.
This show will be available today after noon Central on www.webtalkradio.net.
There is no need to set your clock.
This show will be available for the next week any time and then from the archives for the next 3 months.
Here’s the link: http:tinyurl.com/yzxnexy
Also, tomorrow, Tuesday, this same show will air on 1490 AM, WWPR in the Sarasota, Tampa, Bradenton area. Dedicate one button on your car radio to 1490 AM and listen to Dr. Beth during drive time.
Learn tools and techniques to ensure that your relationships are as good as they can be.
Dedicated to your health and happiness,
Dr. Beth
MELVILLE PUBLICATIONS
P. O. Box 2036
Santa Maria, CA 93457
melvillepublications@comcast.net
Ph: 888.248.6608
www.boomeranglove.com
www.stoptheabuseblog.com
www.stopmaleabuse.com
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no subject
Date: 2010-09-28 02:38 am (UTC)Links for donation sites, plz.
It's a hell of a thing to search for the love you crave, knowing that if you're not careful you could let your worst enemy in to great fanfare.
no subject
Date: 2010-09-28 06:39 pm (UTC)Browsing thru Amazon.com has some encouraging things; when I first became aware of female-on-male domestic abuse there was literally NOTHING out there, and precious little on BPD (thank heaven for bpdcentral). When I look now, there are several books that look like good resources. Of course, I continue to try and tell myself that researching, and understanding the toxic crazy is really not necessary to my well being, and I'd just be better off living my life and forgetting all about that mess.
I try. But my brain thinks that if I understand something, I can solve it, fix it, HELP somehow. And that just isn't true in the least, but I can't convince my smart brain otherwise.
Re: Hm..
Date: 2010-10-02 02:49 pm (UTC)