1852Re: OH DEAR GHOD

[evile]

 

 

 

Me to J-Law:

evilE H  wrote:
Got a phone message from M V, X's stepdad,
sometime this weekend, I think maybe Saturday evening
while we were at the movies or Sunday while we were
shopping for Sweetie's work clothes. I didn't listen to it
until just a minute ago.

Anyway, it was him saying "Thank you for all your
help" and "Thank you for helping [my wife] during the
troubles a couple weeks ago"...very polite, no snippy
tone, but definitely not the tone MV usually uses.

So, I guess(?) it's a guilt trip, meant to make me
feel bad about not doing anything for/with the kids
while X was incarcerated and [his wife] was overrun with
rugrats.

Well...I am sorry as hell for the kids, and I feel
like shit for not being able to be there for them.

But...that week we had other horrible things going on,
that weekend Elaine was in ICU...and I just wasn't up
to handling anything else.

Plus, X and I hadn't been friends or even spoken
to each other for over 6 months at that point. I have
been *more* than generous with my time, energy, and
money with the Alonzos and their children in the past.


But...M V needed somebody to vent at, or be mad at,
and it doesn't really do me any damage for him to be
mad at me or blame me for whatever. It's totally
irrational, but I can understand. And while it hurts
my feelings, it isn't actually doing anything negative
to me to let him be mad at me.

The message gave me his cel phone # (which I will not
call--And, really, since I haven't done anything
wrong, I am not going to give him any openings by
getting defensive or trying to explain or justify
anything about that weekend.) and also said he'd call
me again later. Hopefully he won't.


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Date: Mon, 20 Oct 2003 16:43:05 -0700 (PDT)
From: J-Law
Subject: Re: dammit
To: me




Weird.

Could be he was still kind of reeling/stupefied/unsettled about all
of this and couldn't manage his usual, less formal tone?

But you know him better than I do.... so....

Definitely wise not to get into a situation where he could mix it up
with you, if that's what he's after. Sounds like you have a good
perspective on his thing vs. your thing - just because he might need
to vent/blame/resent or whatever doesn't mean you have to return the
serve.

I am fwding my drama-ish to you in a mo.

 

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