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I had a dream on or around Halloween, which is also near my stepdad G's birthday (oct 28)
It started with me in the living room of our greencastle house (but not actually how it was, just kind of the dream version of it), I was making out with one of my old Bookstop coworkers who I'd had a crush on back in the day.
My mom kept going back and forth between the kitchen and the computer/art/work room., puttering in the kitchen,typing stuff on the computer, and every time she'd come through we'd stop.
Eventually he left.
My dad G. came home and started talking with Mom about his day, and his dr.appointment and this and that. I went in and gave him a hug and told him how much I love and miss him. He said "Now, now, Daughter. No tears. It has been the joy of my life caring for your mother and you kids,"
I don't know if I am writing down the words in the right order, but that's the gist of it. I cried anyway even though he told me not to. I miss him so much. I'm glad he's not in pain and glad he's not having to see the political shit show go down...but damn I miss him.
here in RL, I have reached out to my OK family to see about finally selling my bio-dad's property in OKC. I would be splitting the money from the sale 4 ways - my aunt C, my cousin J (her son, my dad's nephew), my cousin L (her daughter, my dad's niece) and me. Zillow says it's worth about 200,000, so 60K to my aunt for taking care of the property and being the executor, and then the rest to us 'kids'.
We are having new flooring put in the front room. The contractor comes tomorrow for that. We are also ordering pocket doors; he says he knows 'a door guy' who can install those for us, too. We are going to make it up into a guest room/sitting/library sort of space and leave plenty of room in case my sister H. decides it would be a good idea to move Mom in and have her estate pay my brother A to be her fulltime care giver.
Colorado is safely blue for now; I am wondering maybe if my husband won't entertain the idea of moving to Belize, maybe we could go to CO? We have a friend there with a big old house; she is lonely and sad and told us we'd be welcome any time.... I wonder if she'd offer us a place to land if we had to?
Mom has no current ID or passport; I don't think we could move her to Belize.
I hate this.
I hate this.
I hate this.
OH! but just an aside, I've started taking CBG and it seems to be helping with the crushing depression. I have regular sad but not The Nothing. For now. It tastes terrible. but it works. :/
It started with me in the living room of our greencastle house (but not actually how it was, just kind of the dream version of it), I was making out with one of my old Bookstop coworkers who I'd had a crush on back in the day.
My mom kept going back and forth between the kitchen and the computer/art/work room., puttering in the kitchen,typing stuff on the computer, and every time she'd come through we'd stop.
Eventually he left.
My dad G. came home and started talking with Mom about his day, and his dr.appointment and this and that. I went in and gave him a hug and told him how much I love and miss him. He said "Now, now, Daughter. No tears. It has been the joy of my life caring for your mother and you kids,"
I don't know if I am writing down the words in the right order, but that's the gist of it. I cried anyway even though he told me not to. I miss him so much. I'm glad he's not in pain and glad he's not having to see the political shit show go down...but damn I miss him.
here in RL, I have reached out to my OK family to see about finally selling my bio-dad's property in OKC. I would be splitting the money from the sale 4 ways - my aunt C, my cousin J (her son, my dad's nephew), my cousin L (her daughter, my dad's niece) and me. Zillow says it's worth about 200,000, so 60K to my aunt for taking care of the property and being the executor, and then the rest to us 'kids'.
We are having new flooring put in the front room. The contractor comes tomorrow for that. We are also ordering pocket doors; he says he knows 'a door guy' who can install those for us, too. We are going to make it up into a guest room/sitting/library sort of space and leave plenty of room in case my sister H. decides it would be a good idea to move Mom in and have her estate pay my brother A to be her fulltime care giver.
Colorado is safely blue for now; I am wondering maybe if my husband won't entertain the idea of moving to Belize, maybe we could go to CO? We have a friend there with a big old house; she is lonely and sad and told us we'd be welcome any time.... I wonder if she'd offer us a place to land if we had to?
Mom has no current ID or passport; I don't think we could move her to Belize.
I hate this.
I hate this.
I hate this.
OH! but just an aside, I've started taking CBG and it seems to be helping with the crushing depression. I have regular sad but not The Nothing. For now. It tastes terrible. but it works. :/
