good BPD article

 

 

 03-29-2016 at 12:53 PM (38 Views)

https://www.dailykos.com/stories/2013/11/29/1251025/-Borderline-Personality-Disorder-Heroic-Martyr-or-Emotional-Vampire

I do have to disagree with some of it, though.

Although the BPD seems more unstable, hostile, and impulsive than the narcissist, the presence of guilt in the BPD may indicate a greater potential for recovery. 

A BPD doesn't feel guilt as in 'remorse' ...that would mean acknowledging that they did something wrong, something that hurt someone else....and that just does not compute to the BPD mind. They aren't ever wrong, their egos cant stand to be wrong, and the feelings of other people just never enter into the picture. I would say that what a BPD feels when they do wrong, and get caught or called out on it, is more of a toxic shame. http://psychcentral.com/lib/what-is-toxic-shame/

At the base of BPD is the BPD person's feeling (and feelings are facts, to a BPD, remember?) that they are a Bad Person. Doing wrong and being caught doing wrong is a mortal wound...they spin out and over react. They cannot admit that they do wrong, because there is no 'doing'...there is only 'being'....if they do wrong/bad that means they ARE wrong/bad. And they cannot handle that at all, on any level. There is no way I've ever seen to get to the root of this feeling/fact because BPDs spend so much time and energy hiding the fact that they 'know' they are 'bad'....you can't confront that feeling without exposing their weakness and triggering them into an over-reactive shame/rage response. 


But the rest of this article is dead-on and seems to echo my own experiences with PD folks in my life.