The trappings (TRAPS!) of Ego.

[sanitized for public consumption]

I'm not building a Federal Case here, I don't need proof and evidence and examples. I don't need to rehash and dissect everything that everyone said or did, nor assign blame, responsibility, or fault. Nor do I need to heap all blame, responsibility, and fault on myself.

I don't need reasons and proof to back up or justify my feelings. I don't need to prove that I have a right to my feelings. They are my feelings, not a presentation to a judge and jury. (what the hell, the internal judge and jury find me guilty anyway, so no point in trying to sway them.)

Here I stand, guilty as charged...but owning my feelings and no longer denying or making excuses and apologies for them.

I don't like myself when I get into 'lawyer mode'...I don't need to win or be right or provide proof of anything in order to justify how I feel or what I want. Nobody else has to be bad so I can be good. We can all be good, even if we are wrong, even if we disagree.

So...I'm stopping now. Or trying to. I don't want to be this way. I don't want to treat people this way.