1926Dinner with Rubber_pig

[evile]

 

Feb. 7, 2004

 

Me to J-Law:

Oh dear ghod.

Apparently Brother A and Trey's wife Rubber_pig are

1) an item
2) going to get married in July
and
3) wanting to have a baby. She has already (allegedly)
miscarried once since they've been together (and of
course they KNOW it was his...what EVER)

Stop the fucking world--I want to get OFF.

I have tried very hard to convince myself that maybe
I'm just too judgemental. That I expect too much from
any woman who would presume to take one of MY darling
brothers off the market. That I would not accept
anyone who dated them, no matter how nice they really
were, that I'd just find fault & be horrible, that the
problem was perhaps ME, not the women that sineater and
Brother A choose to date.

Tonight proved to me conclusively and 100% that I am
NOT wrong and have NEVER been wrong in the estimation
of any of Brother A or sineater's women. For some horrible
reason known only to God, my brothers have HIDEOUS
taste in women and end up with self-centered crazy
user bitches.

Tonight we heard about how:

She has been married to Trey twice, divorced him once,
and betewen marriage #1 and #2, she got knocked up
with the middle child, whose name is apparently
"Bliss".

Yet, according to my Mom, who called Aunt L earlier
today to tell her to "be nice", Rubber_pig was REALLY
WORRIED about making a good first impression on Aunt L &
Uncle B.

To me, making a good impression would seem to include
NOT sharing such skankariffic tidbits about yourself
with people upon first meeting them.

She had a Mexican Martini and got tipsy.

She SNORTED when she laughed. I think the first time
she did it was an accident and then when the waiter
thought it was cute, she kept doing it on purpose.

Cousin B was in town for the weekend, helping Uncle B do some
work out on L&B's new property, and even HE was
annoyed as hell with this womans' behavior.

She showed us the contents of her purse to show us
what a good mother & how organized she is, including
the fact that she carries sanitary pads just in case
her 10 year old starts her period(EW!!!)

She also talked about giving birth to one of her THREE
(Three! 3!!!!!) ...I didn't listen too hard, she said
the word 'crowning' and then I tuned the fuck out!

Ugh. She is awful. Another Skye_ds in the making.
=======

Me to CF LJ community:

Oh, I'm gonna be SICK!
Met my bro's new GF tonight for the 2nd time.

They met at the same New Year's Eve party where I met her for the
first time.

Turns out she is a twice married, once divorced mother of 3
"A 10 year old, a 5 year old and a 20 month old"

She's in school.

My brother has been unemployed for over a year.

She is still married to the father of two of her 3 kids.

They have been 'dating' since Dec. 31 and it is now only the first
week of February.

They plan on getting married in July.

She has already miscarried his(????) baby and they want to have one
together.

*bangs head into wall until it is a bloody pulp*

You know, I used to think I was some kind of evil bad sister for
always finding fault with every woman my brothers brought home. I
told myself I was being too critical, I should give them the benefit
of the doubt, I shouldn't be so harsh and judgemental.

But ya know...I really don't think so.

What the hell kind of woman says she wants to make a good impression
on a guy's family and then goes out to dinner with them and tells the
guy's aunt & uncle that her middle child is not the child of her
first husband?!?

I am just thinking with the head on top and not the one between the
legs, so I guess that's why I see this for the ungodly train wreck it
so obviously IS.

Please, Gods, Goddesses, and all the little Demons in Hell, don't let
this woman get pregnant again! Knock some sense into my brother
before something horrible happens!

Comments

1931Re: Dinner with Rubber_pig

[evile]

Feb. 9, 2004


Me to J-Law (forwarded Jeff's "can I call you" email)

evilE wrote:
ecch. I definitely get icky vibes from this email. I
suppose I need to throw the 'we' word around some more
to remind him that I'm TAKEN, or in some other way
clarify the nature of our 'friendship'--ie: I see him
at skate night and say 'hey' and that's about as much
as I am interested in.

bleh.

I'm still recovering from the Rubber_pig debacle on
Saturday evening. BTW, I went ahead and added up the
calories consumed in an effort to avoid
listening/paying attention to her bla bla about her
kids and childbirth, and I had 1,060 calories in
alcohol alone. Not good.

Sunday was nice though. I went with Aunt L & Uncle B to take
cousin B home to Boerne. We went on the backroads, past the
turnoff for Sister Creek winery (I thought of
you!)...it was a pretty drive even though it was kind
of a grey, rainy day.

And then I went home & started a fire in the
fireplace, did some laundry, and sat in my chair in
front of the fire.

Hope your weekend was restful. I was near tears
Saturday night because of Brother A's horrible mistake in
progress, but I didn't want to waste your cell minutes
with whining & misery. Nor did I wish to Marsh Your
Mellow.

XO!

=E
======================

J-Law to me:

Oooooohhhhhh, you shouldn't have added up those calories! Ouch! But
I guess it would be ok if you didn't eat anything - rather like
substituting alcohol for food. :)

I am a fashion victim today. I am wearing a grey sweater with a rose
colored silk skirt, black tights and black shoes. The worst part is,
I could have worn a black top, indeed, had two in my hands, but
rejected one has being not slinky enough, and the other, slinky one
as being covered in dog hair (easily remedied).

If I had any money, I'd nip into Ann Taylor and buy something.

Jeff is a creep. Clarify away, my dear.

The Rubber_pig/Brother A thing is just.... sick. I don't get why they go for
these hideous women. You're right, it's not like they are
just "well, there's no accounting for taste;" they are "get the fuck
away from that psycho right now." So, you are totally justified in
your feelings. The suck thing is, justified or not, there is really
very little that you can do directly to change the course of this
situation. Focus instead on how you are going to deal with your
frustration/sadness. You will never like this woman, and you will
never approve of her. Don't try to. You will never convince Brother A to
drop her. Indeed, any effort to do so might make him more resolved
to be with her.

Refocus your energy into your own relationships, your own stuff, and
live your own life well. Though you would doubtless do a better job
than your brothers have done, you cannot live their lives for them.

I love you, honey! XOXOXO!

-J-Law

1932Re: Dinner with Rubber_pig

[evile]

Feb. 9, 2004


Me to J-Law:

You are totally right.

The only thing I _will_ say (assuming Brother A asks my
opinion) is to suggest that it might be better to have
a job and be married (or at least living in the same
house/city) FIRST before attempting to reproduce.
Frame it in some kind of "Think of the life you'll be
offering to this child" type language. It's true, and
it does not reflect any negative judgement of Rubber_pig,
so hopefully he'll be receptive to it.

Then again, Brother A has never been the kind of person to
learn from others' mistakes or use much common sense.

Helpful Advice: Brother A, if you jump off the building,
you'll fall 30 stories to your death.

Brother A: Nope, not me. Gravity only works on other
people. I'll find a way to beat it.

Helpful Advice: Okay then. *sigh*
========

J-Law:

That is very good. Perhaps there is a similar approach for other
aspects of this problem. Maybe we can reformulate the "get away from
the psycho" type advice in a nonjudgmental, but still sensible and
hopefully effective way.

Your rendition of Helpful Advice vs. Brother A is spot-on - but hopefully,
even he will see the sense of this, especially since what you're
saying isn't a judgment on Rubber_pig. One thing to add, and this will be
hard to do with a straight face/calm stomach, is some stuff about how
he will miss out most of the fun/excitement of being a parent if he
and Rubber_pig aren't living together, etc.

GAG! I know, but it might work.
=======
me:

*fingers crossed* I hope so. Maybe she isn't as bad as
I think she is. But she's already got 3 kids and been
married twice & divorced once (from the same guy, but
STILL)...so that's a lot of baggage. And Brother A is the
one who said she gave him "Skye_ds" vibes...

But, I'm going to stay out of it unless he asks, and
then just say my little spiel about being ready for
parenthood in more ways besides emotionally.

Totally new subject: Aunt L gave me a Wine Enthusiast
catalog. I want a cellar now, too.

*sigh*

Oh, here's something kind of funny about Saturday--Cousin B
& I were teasing Aunt L because she bore the main brunt
of Rubber_pig's nonstop blather, having chosen to sit next
to her in the Chuy's booth. We were joking that she
started out pouring her Mexican Martini from the
shaker into the glass, but as the blather wore on,she
went to drinking it straight from the shaker. "Oh
waiter, No Ice & No Olives in the next one!" and such.
So now B., Aunt L & I are going to find/make "No Ice,
No Olives" T shirts. I may go by Hobby Lobby tonight
to get plain shirts & some fabric paint. :P

===========

J-Law:

Very interesting that Brother A made that observation, yet is making these
long term/committed plans re: Rubber_pig. Could it be that he doesn't see
Skye_ds the way that the rest of us do, and so doesn't mean "Skye_ds
vibes" in a negative, or as negative way?

She sounds kind of like Amber as well, with the divorces.

I think there is something about "A" names.

The WE catalogue is very cool. IWA and Wine & Jazz are also good
ones.

I like your t-shirt idea. :)

A martini sounds really good. Not right now, now, but at some point
after the sun is over the yard arm. :)
==========
me:

Brother A *hates* Skye_ds. More than the rest of us. he
won't even tolerate her for the sake of spending time
with sineater.

He delivered an ultimatum to sineater about a year or so
ago, something to the effect that he did NOT want to
see, talk to or spend time with sineater if he was going
to include Skye_ds.

She hit on him last Decemberween with some comment
about how she wanted to see him and sineater "with a woman
between" them. (the woman in question obviously being
UB) Brother A was HORRIFIED and DISGUSTED and SQUICKED
beyond belief by her statement, spent the rest of the
evening trying to hide from her & then left early.

So, Brother A knows as much as the rest of us that Skye_ds
is a sicko & the relationship is bad for sineater, but for
whatever reasons won't apply sineater's lesson to his own
life. (He is probably thinking something along the
lines of: "Oh, sineater didn't know how to deal with
Skye_ds's psycho tendencies, I'll manage Rubber_pig's much
better. It'll never get that bad between US.")

I am glad that my new eating plan doesn't outlaw
alcohol completely, but I still overdid on Saturday.
Did good the rest of the week, though, so I am not
going to worry about it too much.

I found these cute port sipping glasses that have
little 'feet' and a built-in straw that goes to the
bottom of the glass. I was thinking I'd buy one and
then take it to the glassblowers at Scarborough Faire
& ask them to add little claws and horns to make it
look like a little demon.

*sigh* More work, less thinking. :P

1933Re: Dinner with Rubber_pig

[evile]

Feb. 9, 2004

J-Law:

Very interesting. I think your analysis is right on, but that really
makes it all the more disturbing - Brother A is reminded of UB, whom he
loathes, yet is, nevertheless, unwilling to follow the parallel to
it's logical conclusion. And this, despite sineater's sterling example.

*SIGH*

I have seen those port glasses, too. Very cool. :) I like your
idea.

I have a load of research this morning. Luckily, I love research and
it is all interesting. But I gotta get back to it.

1935Re: Dinner with Rubber_pig

[evile]

Feb. 9, 2004


J-Law:

> That is a very good plan.
>
> Stupid, really, to be neurotic about this, but
> whatever.
[above is re: joining DPU group in orkut]
>
> OH! I forgot to tell you. Talked to John last
> night. We were talking about cars, and I'd said
> that I spotted a red testarossa yesterday afternoon,
> and, typical, old guy driver. Which, naturally
> brought up the whole "sorry about your penis" thing
>
> John was saying that he was looking at getting a new
> car sometime in the next year or so, and I said he
> should get a Porsche, but he said that Porsches were
> "sorry about your penis cars."
>
> I nobly resisted stating that that was why I
> suggested it, or similar.
>



Me:

heh. That just flew right on over his head, didn't it?
You were very kind not to rub his nose in it :)

I sent Sister H. a short email to catch her up on the
Brother A/Rubber_pig doings. Now, here is the thing that makes
me want to fling holy water on Rubber_pig: H doesn't
like her. And H likes just about everyone,
including her irresponsible slug of a father who has
many faults and very few redeeming quallities. She is
an incredibly easygoing, terribly forgiving, VERY open
hearted person. So for H not to like
someone...that is major.

*sigh*

J-Law:

Yup - not even on his radar. Or maybe it was. Considering how
insecure he is, I wouldn't be surprised if he was thinking it.

Wow. You're right - if H doesn't like her, forget it. Would her
opinion carry more weight with Brother A because of that? Assuming she
felt comfortable sharing it with him?

Funny - for me not to like someone isn't a big shock. In fact, it is
usually a given. :) But I do forgive pretty readily - I agonize
internally, but I do tend to forgive a great many things.

Like, I forgive Matt, but that doesn't mean I want to be friends.

I haven't quite forgiven John, but it is still too soon.

I'd like to be outta here. Hit the gym, go home and chill.

Oh well. 2 hrs and 13 minutes to go, then I can go
home & maybe do my Hobby Lobby run, assuming I am up
for it. I'm just draggin' ass. I don't do so well when
it's cold and wet outside.

1940Re: Dinner with Rubber_pig

[evile]

Feb. 10, 2004


evilE wrote:
I don't know if Sister H will say anything or not, to be
honest. But you're right--if she did, Brother A would
probably take her more seriously than he takes me.

Because I'm like you; it's pretty rare that I DO like
anyone. :P (*andrew. sigh.* you are right about those
A named women, I think.)

I think you're making good progress on the John thing.
You are being a lot more generous and kind in
conversation at this point than I would be in a
similar situation. It is probably very helpful that
he's not right there in the same city, the physical
distance keeps things on a more even keel.

*sigh* I've got 48 minutes now. I may go home & get a
nap before I do anything else.

J-Law:

Thanks for the perspective on the John thing. Mary thinks I am being
a doormat (not surprising. She is a pretty radical feminist of the
old school). My diplomatic friends may be thinking the same thing,
but express it as gentle worry that, perhaps, my friendship with John
isn't worth enduring the occassional irritations/hurts that come up
in conversation.

To be totally fair to him, though, he has been very good about not
dredging up the hurtful stuff, e.g., never having met the right woman.

Anyway - you're about the only person who thinks I am being good,
generous, kind, etc. rather than some wuss. And it's a big deal for
me to be the way I am being, and not feel that it's weak or whatever -
not being/seeming/feeling weak is usually high on my list of
emotional priorities.

So - thank you! *hug*

It's hard to imagine Sister H saying anything to Brother A about Rubber_pig. I
mean, it is one thing for her to confide in you about her feelings --
a whole other thing for a truly kind, generous spirit like Sister H to
confront Brother A about it.

But, you never know. Her feelings are probably very strong, so she
might feel she has to.

A nap sounds like a good idea to me, too. :) I am more or less done
with my research and moving on to some serious tedium.

1934Re: Dinner with Rubber_pig (me to Sister H)

[evile]

Feb. 9, 2004


Cousin B came up on Friday night & went out to help Uncle B
chop cedar on Saturday. Saturday evening, we went to
dinner at Chuys--Aunt L, Uncle B, Me, Ben, Sweetie, Brother A and
....Rubber_pig. You know, Trey's Wife, Brother A's FIANCEE,
Rubber_pig? yeah....her.

Mom actually called Aunt L earlier on Saturday to tell
her to be nice to Rubber_pig.

Apparently Brother A & Rubber_pig are planning on getting
married in July. And she's already 'miscarried' a baby
(Brother A's? sure, whatever.) and they want to try again &
be parents together.

This is an ungodly trainwreck.

I am trying to give Rubber_pig the benefit of the doubt.
She is pretty and smart, if a little too talkative &
self centered.

I just think the whole wanting a baby & getting
married thing is happening a little too soon.

Just thought I'd catch you up on the doin's round
here.

(Cousin B didn't like her _at all_, btw.)

1959Re: Dinner with Rubber_pig

[evile]

Feb. 13, 2004


another 'major DUH!' moment--Just realized why Mom wants Aunt L &
everyone to be nice to Rubber_pig--she's going to be giving Mom
grandchildren.

duh.