2009-09-25

evile: (Default)
2009-09-25 10:47 am

Writer's Block: Sleep on it

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yes, of course. Haven't we all?

I don't believe I've ever been offered, or been given, forgiveness. And I don't believe I know how to forgive.

Apologies don't ever seem to fix anything.

So I've learned to live with regrets as best I can.

And time and forgetfulness are the best healing I've been able to find.

FWIW, I don't forgive myself, either. Even if my words are eventually forgotten by those they've hurt, their echoes still lash away at my soul and fill me with shame and regret whenever I think of them. Which is why I try not to think of them.

All I can do is try to be better today, and tomorrow, and the day after that. And my half-forgotten, sometimes-remembered failures weigh and weigh on me, until they'll eventually press me into the ground.

But today is a cold and rainy day, good weather for melancholy. And I'm so, so tired. So take these words with as much salt as needed to make them palatable.