evile

dream

Wed, 16 Aug 2023 16:55:33 GMT

last night's dream: I was going on a cruise with some of my classmates from Tulane U, including little e, whom I have not spoken with in a really long time, even though she lives in Austin. Anyhoo, we were on the ship and having drinks and I said something offhand about being childfree, and little e said she'd actually had a kid during a time when she was living and going to school in Houston, a son. And that the father was very strangely coincidentally, my step-cousin 'Tiger'. I told her that Tiger had died (that is true in RL, a car wreck or something? My stepdad told me about it when I was visiting IN a couple months ago. No love lost between Tiger and my dad or his brother; apparently he'd gotten in with some kind of evangelical grifter situation and was absolutely insufferable in his self righteous yet criminal machinations. I saw a tiny bit of it at his mom's funeral several years ago, his mom being my stepdad's sister, ANYHOOOO) e. said she hadn't kept in touch with Tiger at all, the kid was a product of basically a one night stand, and she'd given him up for adoption right away. The conversation in my dream then shifted to how 'sneaky' I was because apparently Thax and I had somehow snuck off to the cruise services desk and paid the remaining balance on everyone's cruises, and e. had wanted to be the one to pay for ours. So we kinda laughed about that. Then e. met up with her father, who was an officer on the ship. He was helping her with an outfit for some fancy formal event on the ship and she was arguing with him over wearing fishnet stockings.

It was a very strange dream.

comments

3233me & J-Law

Sat, 11 Jun 2022 17:02:03 GMT

May 23, 2005

--- J-Law wrote:
I am swamped! We had a good weekend, and I am
already for the next one (three days - yay!)

I hope you had a FANTASTIC birthday and weekend!

Love,

J-Law
===============

Date: Mon, 23 May 2005 11:51:18 -0700 (PDT)
From: "evilE H"
Subject: Re: aaaaaaaaaaaah!
To: "J-Law”

Yup, I had a great time!

Friday we had dinner with a bunch of people at
Mongolian BBQ. I went to bed early (yoga the next a.m.
) and Sweetie went out drinking beer and such with folks.
They ended up at the Yellow Rose & Max got him a lap
dance. Too funny!

Saturday I went to Yoga with e and then we drove
up to the Crossings for our spa day. Next time you're
here, we're definitely doing a day pass at The
Crossings--it's so nice up there. We booked too many
treatments for the amount of time we had; had to rush
through lunch and didn't get enough time sitting
around the hottub, swimming in the pool, etc. But
we'll know for next time.

I got a salt scrub and a stone massage--the massage
was *wonderful*! The warm stones really helped the
muscles relax very deeply. The scrub was nice, but
nothing I couldn't have done myself for cheaper.

Then Sunday I mowed, weedwhacked, cleaned house, did
laundry, and went grocery shopping. Whee!

Tonight we're having people over for full moon and
fire in the backyard, and I'm afraid I over-extended
myself, got too ambitious on the menu etc, and now
it's stressy instead of laid back. But I know that the
difference is only in my perception. If I can just
settle down and breathe a while it'll be FINE and
everyone will have a nice time.

Happy Monday! I'm so glad this is a short week;
everything about work annoys me today.

comments

3193my weekend

Tue, 31 May 2022 17:17:57 GMT

May 9, 2005

Friday night I went to the bellydance show at Casa de Luz. the
jasmine was blooming, it was lovely. I only stayed through the first
half, I was tired.

Got up Saturday a.m. and checked email; onyxlynxx bailed for Yoga. I was
under the impression that e. had also made other plans for
Saturday, so I decided to say 'fuckit' to yoga & stayed on the
computer goofing off for a couple hours. e. called after yoga &
said she'd missed me in class. d'oh!!

I went shopping, got some canisters for my work coffee, tea, and
splenda at Bed Bath & Beyond, got a skirt at Ross, and then went over
to L&B's, let the cats out, fed them, watched TV until about
3. Went downtown, got there terribly early, so I stopped at Halcyon
to have a coffee, then to the Drafthouse to see The Princess Bride.
Nobody showed up, so I was feeling terribly unloved, then Sharjinka
showed up as the theatre went dark, followed by Donhedon, felisviolacious, and her Little One.
Little One was fidgety, felisviolacious and Jinx kept making comments...it was
fairly embarassing. The waitron gave us one tab with all our stuff, I
had gotten mead, it was awful. Oh well. The movie was OK.

Then I went off to San Antonio for Otter Chaos. Met up w/Rengeek &
Loa. They had some kind of serious conversation at one part of the
evening, apparently because he'd gone out sometime and told her he
hadn't, or some such. Oh well. The band was good, the company was
fairly decent, and I got to see Rengeek's new RV. That was cool. Oh,
yeah, and I got to see Captain Jack without the makeup & costume.
Wedding ring. d'oh.

Got home a bit after Midnight. Slept Sunday until 1:30PM (wow). It
was raining out, and dark, so I guess that's why. Then I went over
to L&B's, fed the cats, watched more TV. Nikiyoy came over with
strawberries & cool whip and we watched "Finding Neverland." I cried,
but mostly I didn't like it. Badly behaved ugly sprogs & Depp's
character encouraging them to be bad at the table, in the house, etc.

Stayed at L&B's until about 10 last night. Around 9:30, cousin B called
and sounded really upset, when the phone rang I let the machine get
it,and thought it was [brother A] at first, then realized it was B, dashed
for the phone, and the call had already ended. Apparently M-[B's mom] and
B got into it physically and [B's mom] called the cops. Looks like
L&B get to take him in for his senior year. I would make sure
M-. paid for his schooling, or at least helped, the selfish bitch.

Anyhoo...that sucked.

And then I went home, read, and now I'm at work. Girls night tonight
is at L&B's, I'm making baked pasta, Onyxlynxx's bringing salad, Nikiyoy's
bringing her s'mores maker, Kulilinei's bringing bread and it should be a
nice time.

comments

2180Me & J re: e. & onyxlynxx

Tue, 28 Sep 2021 16:27:08 GMT

May 6, 2004

--- J-Law wrote:
Sweet! I am very ready as well. I wanted to be
outta here days ago.... but it's been nice to be
here and slacking, then go on vacay, come back and
slack some more. :)

I've heard nothing but good things about JetBlue,
so I am actually looking forward to the flight. And,
I am planning to pack a lunch in case I get hungry
for real food. I am going a la francais: ham and brie
on baguette and fruit. I figure that would
withstand the rigors of travel.
=========
me:

evilE wrote:
I just got done with a Peter Mayle fiction
book--_Chasing Cezanne_. It was very cute & fun,
made me want to TRAVEL! And eat French food... *sigh*

There's a scene where two of the characters are
getting ready to fly from Paris to NY and they can't
face the thought of airplane food, so they stop in a
market and buy wine, baguette, etc. and when they
get onboard, one of the characters instructs the
stewardess on how to care for & serve the wine
(something like "It should be gently chilled, not
shocked"). It's hilarious! Totally reminded me of
you and your Jet Blue picnic :) That's a great idea, though. I would
have never thought of it. I may have to pop by Whole Foods or
Central Market the day I leave so that I don't have to face peanuts
in the air and dry bagels in the airport... :P

I went to poly dinner last night & it was fun. Found
out that a gal I'm starting to befriend was one of
skye_ds's classmates at UT. Amazingly, this girl
remembers 'Andie' fondly and wants me to put them
back in touch. Well, okaaaay...
============================
--- J-Law wrote:
I LOVE Chasing Cezanne. One of my favorite books.
I love Cyrus Pine - he is so hilarious and cute. I
was thinking of that very scene when I was planning
my inflight repast. :)

Interesting about UB's classmate. Fond memories of
"Andie." Chuh.

Got to talk to Tom last night - like two hour convo.
We're going to see Van Helsing next week or the
following weekend. On the one hand, I'd have liked
to have seen him this weekend, but it's nice that
we're both not in an all-fired hurry, and I could
sure use a bit of time to myself this weekend.
==================
evilE wrote:
Yeah, it's always important to find/make "me time" in
your life.

Cyrus Pine was my favorite character too :)

I sent e. 'happy birthday' email on MOnday. For
some reason I had it in my head that her bday was the
3rd rather than the 23rd. She wrote back & asked me if
I wanted to do something. I suggested Van Helsing, and
she was all like "Oh, I already have plans to see
that" (Like the theatre was going to be 100% full of
all the people who were going with her and I couldn't
possibly fit, right), and how about we go see
"Godsend" some other time? A movie with a kid in it.
yeah, sure. It looks creepy & stuff, but I don't
really want to see it. I hate how she makes me feel. I
wonder if I should actually tell her that, or just
give up. *sigh* I lose a friend either way, one is
less fraught with drama. I think I'll go with the
'silence is golden' approach from here on in. Why do I
keep bothering? :(

I kinda wish onyxlynxx had not been so positive & happy
about the possibility of re-meeting UB, so we could
dish old dirt. Oh well.

===========================
Date: Thu, 6 May 2004 09:47:52 -0700 (PDT)
From: "J-Law Add to Address
Book
Subject: Re: Sorry Honey...
To: "evilE

Maybe onyxlynxx was just being nice? Like, being unsure of how you feel
about UB and/or assuming that you have positive feelings for her, she
didn't want to say anything negative, but felt that she had to say
something.

For example, Gloria, one of the secretaries here, and I have a mutual
acquaintance. One day, she asked me, "oh, then you must know Susanne
Aronowitz!" I said that I did know her, and that she is nice, even
though I absolutely loathe her (Susanne). It's true that Susanne is
nice when you first meet her, but she is one of these people who has
an agenda, and if you don't fit into it, she won't give you the time
of day.

As for e..... silence is golden is the way to go.... but there's
two sides to this: outward silence, as in not reaching out to her,
trying to plan things, etc., which is fairly easy. The tough thing
is inward silence, i.e., you, internally, making peace with your
outward decision. Does that make sense? I think what's troubling
you is not so much the getting together/fuckwittage with e., but
the internal conflict that you have about it/your friendship with
her.

If I can use myself as an example: me freaking out about men - is he
gonna call, why isn't he calling, he is a fuckwit bla bla bla, e.g.,
Sacto John. Contrast that with more recent events, in which I have
just stopped listening to that internal voice. It is still there
sometimes, but it gets quieter and quieter.... I have no control
over whether they are going to call, or if they are jerking me
around, just as you have no control over e.'s flakiness.

What we both have control over is (a) how we react (i.e., say
something, say nothing); and (b) making peace with our chosen
reaction and moving on with our lives. If you opt for silence is
golden, than your making peace part is a little easier. You aren't
causing big drama, you aren't saying things that you might regret,
bla bla bla. You're just detaching.

XOXOXOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

J-Law

comments

2179Dealing with e makes me feel bad

Tue, 28 Sep 2021 16:22:34 GMT

May 6, 2004

Wow, I feel like I'm the last ditch option here. Such a privilege,
really.

I brought it on myself by wishing her happy bday. I don't think I'll
bother anymore.

Love the very precise brand name & material recommendation there,
Thanks. Then again, e. is a flake so why does this
surprise/hurt/offend me???

---------------------------
From: e.
Subject: RE: Happy Birthday!
Date: Thu, 06 May 2004 11:07:03 -0500

Humm, not sure but my advice maybe to do with wicking so you are not
wet for hours.

I already have plans to see Van Helsing, how about you and I go see
Godsend?

From: evilE
To: e. .
Subject: RE: Happy Birthday!
Date: Mon, 3 May 2004 10:54:50 -0700 (PDT)

[another email right before this about getting together for Van
Helsing]

OH! I wanted to ask you. I'm thinking of going >horseback riding in
MT and need a good 'no motion' >type sports bra. Do you have a brand
that you like & >could recommend?

e. wrote: > >----------------------
----------- > >Hey sweetie how are you? Yours is 3 days before mine.

>We should do something together???? Dinner? Wimberly? >how are you?
> >E (well the other E)

From: evilE >
To: >e. .
Subject: >Happy Birthday! >Date: Mon, 3 May
2004 04:54:58 -0700 >(PDT) > >Hope it's a GREAT one! :) > >*hugs* > >

comments

1450My weekend plans

Sun, 29 Aug 2021 17:53:02 GMT

May 31, 2003

Last night I hung out with e for the evening.

Oh, lord. e just sat at the no kidding happy hour and looked
miserable. Didn't hardly say 'boo' to anyone, didn't say hi or
bye...and then after we got out in the parking lot she was all
like "Oh, those people really HATE kids.." um...no.

So then we go to Suzi's, this expensive, very bland chinese place she
likes for dinner, and she starts talking about the Matrix as if there
was some sort of correlation between Matrix and RL, "obviously
there's something to The Matrix, or else so many people wouldn't have
seen it".

Um...maybe they went to see it because of the fight scenes, the
action, or the women in tight vinyl clothing and not because it
struck some metaphysical chord. I mean...does Spiderman really exist
simply because the Spiderman movie did 800 million in box office?
no....

And then she was off on clarivoyance, telepathy, and all this other
crackpot garbage, and was all offended that I don't believe in that--
"You read tarot! Your cards predicted I would lose my virginity! How
can you NOT believe in this?"

um...yeah. Girl has a fricken masters' degree and is so 'open
minded' that her brain has apparently fallen out.

Anyhoo, today I'm going to go take pictures of the wierd houses up
the road, go to the HFS park & take pictures of the horses, and then
go to this stupid pagan meeting of PACT, a group that is about to
disband due to 'lack of interest'...nevermind the fact that the
meetings are erratically scheduled and nobody hears about them until
the last minute, or, once, AFTER the fact.

So...they are apparently disbanding and want to give our treasury
contents to another pagan group. FUCK THAT SHIT. I printed up a list
of local charities (meals on wheels, SPCA, etc.) that would better
use the funds.

I just got email notice of the meeting 2 days ago, had to ditch my
faire plans for today (no biggie, I didn't have anyone I was giving a
ride to or anything), but I am going, just to make sure they don't
give the $ to the fuckwits at Council of Magickqual Arts.

I am thinking of suggesting that skye_ds and I go to Scarby together
tomorrow, since Sweetie isn't home, I can invite her to spend the night,
or invite myself over to spend the night, and we can just go from
there. Not sure I'll work up the courage for it...

I feel very bad & guilty for never getting ahold of Sunshine for
faire :(

Anyway...that's my exciting weekend plans.

Daredevil is on at the discount cinema at 7:20. I might go.

Also 4:20 I won't make that due to PACT, but maybe tomorrow if I end
up not talking to skye_ds about Faire for SUnday.

I also want to rent Life of Brian, because they were doing quotes
from it on the BRATS page.

comments

1396PAST/PRESENT/FUTURE

Sun, 29 Aug 2021 15:43:29 GMT

May 7, 2003

Me to J-Law:
(she is getting together with an old HS buddy who is the total anti-
e., putting things on schedule, etc.)

The annoying thing about e., I guess, is that she's
always been a self-centered little flake, and she
still is. the 15 years of life we've seen between
Tulane and today don't seem to have taught her
anyhing...even though she got her degree, got her
Masters, worked as an EMT, had a couple of serious
relationships, moved from NY to Houston to Austin, got
serious about racing & her health, etc. And none of it
matured her at all...bizarre.

---

there's talk on the aus poly yahoo group re: taking a bellydance
class. Z Helene is teaching one Saturdays on the ACC Northridge
campus starting 5/31. As cool as I think she is, as much as I'd love
to spend more time with her, I will never do this.

flashbacks to jr hi, hs, where coaches would make the whole class do
exercises over again because I couldn't keep up.

flashbacks to body business where instructor spent (I felt) too much
of the class time correcting my movements.

maybe even a vague stirring back to another ACC class I took in
dance, where I was fat and awkward & stupid, back to IWC age 5-6-7-
ish where I took ballet & always arrived after the warmup & never
did as well as the other kids.

I don't have enough grace & coordination to dance. I don't do classes
very well if it involves physical stuff. I don't have enough
confidence in my body and movement to want to take a 1-on-1 class.
I'll never be proficient if I don't learn and don't practice. Catch
22.

comments

3026the weekend

Sat, 28 Aug 2021 21:23:04 GMT

Mar. 14, 2005

Friday was Varekai, which was wonderful. After the show, we saw
fireworks outside. I assumed at first it was part of the Varekai
experience, but turns out it was the Austin Music Hall of Fame or
somesuch, part of their ceremonies. It was a wonderful serendipity.
We had gone to Central Market before the show to get dinner stuff &
stuff to snack on after the show. We sat in the parking lot and had
bread, cheese, and fruit. That was really nice.

Saturday I just could not get my shit together and arrived at yoga
too late--the class was packed. The snotty little shit at the desk
told me the class can hold 35 and they hadn't sold out, but it was
too full for my comfort and I honestly did not see any floor space I
could use. So e. got ther after me and we went to brunch at
Trudy's. I had already had my card marked, she hadn't. That kind of
sucks. Oh well. I'll have to steal something from them that is worth
$8 or whatever :P

I went to Steinmart looking for that wine chiller bag I'd seen
before, but it wasn't there. So no Grapevine market. I had planned to
get that bag, then a bottle of TX wine, and mailing it priority to
J-law for her bday. Oh well. Amazon gift certificate it is...feh.

checked the PO box, then back to the house. Puttered on the internet,
decided eventually that I didn't want to drive all the way out to
Excalibur and be alone/lonely and/or have people asking me 'where's
Sweetie?" all day. Pulled weeds in the yard. Did dishes. Laundry.

Sunday was kitefest with Sweetie & thewordnerd, then we met Peglegasus for MOngolian
BBQ.

Home, played on computer, then read M. Lackey's Fairy Godmother. It
was cute & fluffy.

And that was my weekend.

Oh, let me meow-meow for a bit here, since I can't on LJ. This was
Maggiemaepisces' reply to my "I'm not going to Excalibur; I can't stand the idea
of people asking me 'Where's Sweetie?' all day."

maggiemaepisces
2005-03-13 04:59
Darlin' you totally rock! While sweetie is cute and nice and
all...um...we love you! Missed you at GWNN. Loud and boring as always
but Ladydreamtime will be seriously shopping for another munch venue with the
board's permission. Of course she must bring her findings back for
submision to the board, to then put before the membership, but...it's
a start to getting someplace where we can actaully hear each other!

Who/what shall we do for SBC Monday night? Any thoughts?
---------------------------

Yeah, you love me so much you skipped out on fondue night for the
sake of spending time with some man and never called or even emailed
ot tell me you were not going to be there. Deeds, not words. Don't
tell me how much you love me and then treat me like crap. What shall
we do Monday? How bout you plan something and then I won't show up?

comments

2329Stepford Wives

Tue, 27 Apr 2021 23:03:03 GMT

Jun. 29, 2004

Saw Stepford Wives with e. Pretty cute film, funny twist ending.

I think if I had an opportunity to be happy, I'd take it. Even if it
involved being turned into a 'robot' with control chips and whatnot.

If there was something in my brain that could be turned on or off
that would make me happy to do the boring paper shuffle at work and
happy to come home and scrub toilets and scoop poop and wash and
scrub and clean and be a cuntslave to the house and to Sweetie, and wear
makeup and girly clothes and get in shape and stay in shape and cook
and clean and feel happy the whole time...I would love it.

There is no difference, subjectively, between BEING happy and FEELING
happy.

An, really, I do like a clean house.

I just hate cleaning it. Especially when most of the mess and clutter
isn't mine and I dont' know where it goes.

comments

1481gah!!!

Tue, 13 Oct 2020 20:29:21 GMT

Jun. 11, 2003

Date: Wed, 11 Jun 2003 19:33:32 -0700 (PDT)
From: "evilE H"
Subject: gah!!!
To: J-Law

Okay, so Hill Country Outdoors met tonight for 'blues
on the green'--live music in Zilker park. People bring
picnics, dogs, kids, blankets, folding chairs, etc.
It's a real Woodstock scene. e. wanted to do this,
and I agreed to go with her.

The place the HCO people were talking about meeting
was somewhere I wasn't sure I knew how to get to, so I
parked elsewhere & then e & I called each other on
our cellphones and I found the group. They were
setting up right out in the sunlight, and I was
already starting to be sunburned after walking the 15
min from my car & walking around for 10 looking for
them.

Anyway, she didn't like the HCO people. She thought
they were unfriendly and the women were (wait for it!)
"fussy and flaky" and "I don't like women like that"
*Bwahahahah*

To me, they looked just like her mtn bike friends:
young upwardly mobile professionals, tan with big
white teeth, politician haircuts on the men, shoulder
length ponytails on the women (all had straight &
natural-colored hair, of course--I was the only
burgundy haired one in the bunch), grown up sorority
girls and frat boys, wearing last year's ratty J Crew
as their 'play clothes', mouths full of smart talk,
heads empty of deep thought. Yeah, those kind of
people. Okay, the women were a bit more fat-ass than
her uber-fit mtn bike girlfriends...but still, they
seemed like e's kind of crowd.

So...I needed to sit in shade if I was gonna stay, and
I told the HCO leader guy this. And then, EVEN THOUGH
SHE SAID SHE HATED THEM, she did not want to come sit
in the shade with me, she preferred to stay in the sun
with the HCO folks. WTF!

So she and I walked to the food booths and she
dithered about what she wanted to eat, and bitched
about some mt. bike friend of hers who pinches her
butt and snaps her bra when he gets drunk, bla bla.
And then I left.

Music was supposed to start at 7. I got to my car
about 7:30 and still didn't hear anything coming from
the stage.

What a waste of my time.

comments

2345icq w/A

Mon, 21 Sep 2020 17:25:29 GMT

Jul. 6, 2004

evile: howdy :)
SkyeDS: hola :)
evile: Not a good day to come to work without my willpower--someone
brought chex mix...

SkyeDS: ruh roh
evile: yeah.
evile: If I can just stay away from that area of the room, I may be
OK.
SkyeDS: with me, it's smell
evile: we have microwaves all over, so I have had to kind of learn to
ignore smells. People usually burn stuff, so it's not hard to be
grossed out instead of hungry when I smell their food.
SkyeDS: I can't think of much worse than the pervasive smell of burnt
popcorn
evile: it's nasty. I go home with headaches some days.....oh well.
better than eating the entire 4th floor.
SkyeDS: I always feel guilty about the smell of anything I put in the
microwave because Tonya and Eugene are subjected to whatever I eat.
evile: *shrug* it's to be expected if you work near the break area, I
guess. I've temped in places where there were rules about what you
could and could not cook in the microwave.
SkyeDS: old man Mersky got upset one day when in the kitchen I made a
shrimp stirfry
evile: I can see that, I guess.
SkyeDS: and he stunk us out of the office one day because he had a
little kitchen area all to himself and he microwaved three day old
salmon
evile: ew.
evile: we used to only have 2 microwaves in the actual break room,
but then someone brought one from home to put by her desk, then my
unit went in on one to put back by the boss' desk, et c etc, and now
we've got em everywhere. And nobody ever cleans any of them.
SkyeDS: I loved the kitchen at the law library
SkyeDS: full size fridge, two microwaves and a full size stove with
oven
evile: nice.
evile: Little e is driving me crazy trying to get together when
SHE wants to and see a movie SHE wants to see...I keep telling
her "I'm doing __ on that day, want to join me?" and apparently she
will have none of it. I dont' know why...
evile: And this month's plans are even more eclectic than usual, so I
don't know why none of them are of interest.
SkyeDS: apparently one of my acquaintances in #politics on IRC owns a
cafe on the lake. He invited me to bring the bird out to eat. He's
close to Emma Long, where APD told me I could go riding.
SkyeDS: looks cool
SkyeDS: http://skishores.com
evile: cool.
SkyeDS: I'm still growing accustomed to this having plans months in
advance for every single weekend
evile: *nods*
SkyeDS: I don't know why, it was always like that growing up,
fronting a band and doing various academic and/or music competitions.
SkyeDS: guess 10 years of being sedentary
evile: After July I'll probably go back into Hermit mode again...I'm
already freaking out thinking about all the people/places/things
evile: I know i actually left myself plenty of quiet alone me-time,
but it just doesn't feel like it at the moment.
SkyeDS: I don't even know what i'm going to do with myself once CRW
is over
evile: heh.
SkyeDS: ride in Georgetown on Sundays, I think, because that's one of
my favorite parks
SkyeDS: explore Somerville eventually
SkyeDS: and there's Emma Long and Pace Bend
evile: *nods*
evile: Been to Emma Long, it's nice.
SkyeDS: my friend's restaurant is like right across the road
SkyeDS: his website is cool
evile: that's handy.
SkyeDS: he has a pet policy right on his webpage
SkyeDS: and pictures
SkyeDS: and movie nights and live music
evile: nice :)
evile: woops...I just posted something to the poly group that I meant
to send to one person. It wasn't anything snarky, thank heavens :P
evile: Was trying to send blake the wierdo a lead on a house.
SkyeDS: some of us took up sign language in grade school
SkyeDS: was an effective way to talk in class without passing notes
evile: heh.
SkyeDS: we thought we were clever
evile: I wish I'd studied sign when I had the chance.
evile: Well, I pondered some more and I guess maybe e is not
interested in doing anything with me BUT the movie she wants to see
anyway.
SkyeDS: my mother once pointed out to me that I would have more
friends if I actively cultivated them more
evile: I was laboring under the apparently mistaken idea that she
wanted to get together to spend time with me, but once I got that out
of the way, it's clear that the point is to see the movie.
SkyeDS: and then pointed out when I was trying to improve that, that
I only did things I was interested in doing.
evile: it's a 2 way street...
SkyeDS: I'm not entirely like that.
SkyeDS: I operate under the assumption that if we are friends, we
have common interests, and if you do something you like, chances are
if I try it I might like it
evile: Well, look, within your sphere of interests, there are only a
few choices a person can make if they want to spend time with you:
HFS, SCA, Horses, Movies, Camping. And that's the options. If they
dont like any of that, too bad for them.
SkyeDS: actually, if we do things that I can do after work and not
during the day on the week, I can be divorced from the rest of my
baggage ;P
evile: And, really, you find plenty of people who are interested in
one/more of those things, so why go hunting in areas that don't
interest you for more people to hang with?
evile: you told me you are too tired after work during the week.
SkyeDS: I like going to see the dancers, and perfectly happy if the
boys and the children aren't there.
SkyeDS: I am very tired.
SkyeDS: but things like watching dancers isn't tiring. Skating,
though, for example, is out.
SkyeDS: I wish karaoke wasn't on a "school" night, would like to do
that.
evile: Me, I have about a bazillion interests and I find it
difficult/impossible to believe that e can't find something in a
list of 8 *completely disparate* things that she is interested in.
evile: So the only conclusion I can come to is that the point of the
getting together is not for the friendship but for 1 very specific
movie that she wants to see.
SkyeDS: that does surpass understanding. granted my understanding is
limited and simple.
evile: In which case, why keep trying to gte ME to go to it with her?
Why not find someone else and just go to the movie....
evile: *sigh* she hasnt' done or said anything egregious enough for
me to justify blowing her off for the rest of our lives, but it's
just so damned annoying to deal with her sometimes.
SkyeDS: I annoy everybody on a regular basis.
evile: I can see someone not being comfortable being invited to a
group activity--like I won't invite her to NK or poly dinners but why
the reluctance to do something with me one-on-one that I had already
planned on attending all by myself, anyway?
SkyeDS: dunno?
evile: I labor under the delusion that if I can understand someone's
behavior rationally, it will all just make perfect sense and be less
hurtful. It really is a delusion.
evile: And then after endless back & forth & various convolutions,
she'll likely as not end up flaking out on me at the last minute,
anyway. so what is the point. argh.
SkyeDS: I don't deal well with people when I can't figure out their
internal logic, when it isn't consistent even with itself
evile: *nods* me too.
evile: Or if I can't figure out what they want...that makes me fairly
crazy.
evile: For example, a friend saying "I haven't seen you in a while,
we should spend time"...and then turning down/ignoring every
invitation I extend.
evile: come to think of it, e's not the only one of those...
SkyeDS: which has happened a lot lately it seems like
evile: WTF.
evile: oh well. when all else fails, you drag your family kicking &
screaming... :P
SkyeDS: actually when all else fails, I take the keys and leave them
at home
evile: Just kidding. I would not invite family to something if I
didn't really want to see them & spend time.
SkyeDS: and when I get home, I get to listen to choruses of "but we
wanted to go..."
evile: heh. I get that too.
SkyeDS: mmhm. bullSHEET.
evile: heh.
evile: Oh well. It seems e & I may have a 'date' after all. Now
she wants me to assure her that the movie will still be playing by
then. what. ever.
evile: Yet another reason I can never see myself doing the poly thing-
-too much of a logistical nightmare. :P
SkyeDS: well yeah.
SkyeDS: particularly if multiple SOs refuse to behave like family
around each other
evile: hard enough just to juggle life & friends with only one
Sweetie in the picture.
SkyeDS: for Valentine's I took sonar0m and sineater out to a movie. asked
kaleon if he wanted to go, he said no.
SkyeDS: so I slated time for him the next day.
SkyeDS: and he was upset that it wasn't ON Valentine's day.
evile: nice.
SkyeDS: shrug
evile: I can totally understand wanting 1-on-1 time with someone. But
not demanding it every time you spend time with them...
evile: "Enjoy what you can, not what you can't" as my friend Don so
wisely said.
SkyeDS: well, being obnoxious is not the way to induce someone to
want to spend time with you at all, much less alone.
evile: heh.
evile: the bi womens discussion group is tonight. I know I know
people in the group & would like to go just to say hi...but no real
reason for me to be at that meeting. bi is pretty much a moot point
with me anymore ...
SkyeDS: Sweetie has not the average male fantasy of watching two women
and/or participating?
evile: nope.
evile: he is very hetero mono vanilla.
SkyeDS: sometimes people think they'll be ok with something, say
they'll be ok with it, and then when they actually get to crossing
that bridge, it doesn't work that way.
evile: *nods*
evile: that is why I suppose so much of poly relationships end up
being talking instead of fucking :P
SkyeDS: all longterm relationships eventually end up that way - when
you get too old to be interested in sex anymore for example
evile: well, but you don't have to constantly negotiate & renegotiate
mono. the rules are pretty well instilled from a young age.
evile: I don't distrust Blake, but I am kind of amazed that people
are so trusting with their location info.

evile: especially in the unsteady political climate we live in.
SkyeDS: you're not supposed to have to negotiate and renegotiate.
however, there are a lot of people who don't seem to be able to play
by the rules no matter how well instilled they were.
evile: But what if, like you say, you say "Oh, I won't mind you
spending the night with so-and-so" but when it happens, you feel sad
& jealous & upset. Does everyone just ignore your feelings and go on
with the original agreement as written?
SkyeDS: nope, have to renegotiate
SkyeDS: just like you do when someone says "I'll keep myself only
unto you" and then doesn't.
evile: exactly. And I personally like it that poly has room for that
whereas mono does not.
SkyeDS: do you take them back or don't you
SkyeDS: if you take them back
SkyeDS: then you're renegotiating.
evile: In mono, it seems that the incident is covered over and never
spoken of, in most cases.
SkyeDS: they say "men marry women hoping we won't change, and we
marry men hoping they will" and we're both wrong.
evile: heh.
evile: I don't marry nobody.
evile: have made a few dumb assumptive mistakes anyway. Oh well.
SkyeDS: Kaleon said that I don't want him or sineater or sonar0m to find
someone else, I want it all one way.
SkyeDS: he feels that little details like playing by established
rules are not worth discussing
evile: he likes to push boundaries.
SkyeDS: he should have been a lawyer
SkyeDS: a trial or criminal defense lawyer.
evile: too much work. you already told me how lazy he was in college.
SkyeDS: he'd have paralegals to do his research for him
evile: never would have made it thru a JD program, much less study
hard enough to pass the bar.
SkyeDS: well there is that
SkyeDS: he would have to find a drive through diploma mill law school
evile: even online classes aren't too slouchy. I had an online
paralegal class kick me up one side of the street & down the other.
SkyeDS: really?
evile: indeed.
SkyeDS: do tell?
evile: *shrug* nothing to tell. signed up & paid for part 1 of a 6
part class, failed miserably, sold my books on Amazon.com, The End.
SkyeDS: I suspect the courses are getting harder because established
paralegals are trying to shut the door behind themselves.
evile: probably.
SkyeDS: in other ways besides creating quasi-certifications through
the two national organizations
SkyeDS: what they'd really like is for a paralegal to have to pass a
bar.
evile: *nods* makes sense
SkyeDS: right now, paralegal and legal assistant are catch alls that
could mean any combination of experience, schooling or possibly none
at all
evile: yup.
evile: I read an article a couple years ago that said TX was going to
be hurting for paralegals & legal secretaries. Then came to find out
that TX pays the lowest of any state for those services. duh.
SkyeDS: and in Texas, Austin is even worse
evile: If your paralegal cert. isn't like a state bar that keeps you
practicing in one area, why NOT go where the money is?
SkyeDS: paralegals here are lucky to get 40K and in Dallas we get 70K
SkyeDS: yours truly is making less per hour than Kelly driving school
buses, but oh well.
evile: your boss seems very cool & you get a lot more flexibility
than Kelly. Or me, for that matter.
SkyeDS: yep
SkyeDS: and I don't have the burden of a paralegal all day either
evile: life's a series of trade-offs it seems...
SkyeDS: I get to play paralegal now and again but mostly I'm not even
legal assistant, mostly I'm secretary and receptionist
SkyeDS: and underpaid for those things too, but I have lots of other
compensatory perks
evile: *nods*
evile: Man, I am so ready for my nap!
SkyeDS: I'm going to dump tack in a bucket of oil and go to bed the
minute I get home
evile: sounds like a plan. I don't know why Tuesdays are so much more
tiresome than Mondays, but they are.
SkyeDS: I haven't made up the sleep I lost Sunday night/Monday morning
evile: *nods*
evile: "John & John"...that's some bumper sticker.
SkyeDS: grin
evile: Edwards made a pretty strong showing in hte primaries, not too
surprising.
SkyeDS: lot of people thought it was going to be Hildebeast
evile: I just saw a yahoo news story about a magazine that published
Kerry/Gephardt. heh. oops. so much for scooping the rival press.
SkyeDS: saw that, lol, too funny
evile: yup :)
evile: I went looking t the Krav Maga class schedule. no way I can
get to an earlier class & go to m yhair appt and go to poly dinner.
feh.
evile: They have a level 1 at 5:45 a.m. on SAturdays, supposedly.
jeez, that's hardcore...
evile: well, it's about time for me to make my rounds
SkyeDS: hugs, ciao bella :)
evile: drive safe & get good rest tonight :)
SkyeDS: thankee. you too

comments

1541 e. bags me, as usual

Fri, 18 Sep 2020 18:51:18 GMT

Jul. 29, 2003

--- e wrote: ---------------------------------
I got an email from Alan so I decided to make up this little poem-
as I think it applies to both of us. Erick & evilE I haven't seen
either of you in forever =(

I Miss Having a Bear
Now I have one full of stuffing and fur
But am looking for one with warm heart and good hair
Who is intelligent, kind, and cares
About me and stuff I like
You know movies, books, and bikes
He must like my cat, no doubt about that Must be cute, single, smart,
and funny
`Cause I am looking for a new snuggle bunny
So if you come across one that likes to go out and play
But also who can curl up and watch movies on a rainy day
Please inspect him once or twice then send him my way

==========================
Date: Mon, 28 Jul 2003 10:36:11 -0700 (PDT)
From: evilE
Subject: Re: Monday poem =)
To: e

Thanks for the poem; it was very sweet! How have you been? Busy, I
guess :) I've got a few August plans
8/2 I'm going tasting at Spicewood Vineyards & swimming at Krause
Springs (both are no-pets, winery is no-kids, too)
8/3 I'm swimming at Blue Hole in Georgetown & then hiking to San
Gabriel Park. (I think it's less than 4 mi round trip)
16th-17th, I'm thinking of going camping on the coast. Maybe leave
afternoon of the 15th to get a good start. There are a couple of
coastal-area wineries I want to try, too.

Then, the Austin Chronicle Hot Sauce festival is August 24! Always a
good time! <http://www.austinchronicle.com/events/hotsauce/>

Let me know if any of these are of interest & we can firm up plans.
Of course, I'm up for movies, dinner, etc. during the week, so just
give me a holler. I'm about to quit my gym, so my MWF schedule just
got a lot free-er, too. XO! =E
==================
--- e wrote:

---------------------------------

>8/2 I'm going tasting at Spicewood Vineyards &

swimming at Krause Springs (both are no-pets, winery
is no-kids, too)

>8/3 I'm swimming at Blue Hole in Georgetown & then

hiking to San Gabriel Park. (I think it's less than 4
mi round trip)

I would be interested in spending time with you doing
one of these things need to hear back from another
friend first tho. What time where you planning on
these? How is Sweetie doing?

Hot sauce I think I can do that too!
================

Date: Mon, 28 Jul 2003 12:43:57 -0700 (PDT)
From: mE
Subject: Re: Monday poem =)
To: e

No definite time line on these. Probably leave noonish, come back
whenever. I'm pretty flexible. Why don't you get your other plans
squared away, and we can work with whatever's left. -E

-----------------------------------------
From: e
Date: Mon, 28 Jul 2003 15:09:55 -0500

thanks!

====
Me to J-Law:

e. sent another 'cutesey' "please love me" email--some poem about
a teddy bear or some shit that she wrote herself. So I replied with
something like "Here are some things I was thinking of doing in Aug.
let me know if you're interested"...her reply was that she needed to
get with another friend & make plans, and I'd get whatever of her
time was left over, basically. I feel so loved. I can see that
occasionally, but that seems to *always* be her answer: "my other
friend(s) want(s) to do something, but if they aren't doing anything
that night, I'll settle for doing something with you". Makes me feel
so very special.

comments

2832Re: so, the weekend. , me to J, plus email from e.

Wed, 26 Aug 2020 17:21:32 GMT

Jan. 18, 2005

I love 3 day weekends! I had a great time. Yoga on Saturday a.m. with
e. (she is always late, so we don't even sit next to each other,
but whatever...the yoga itself is good for me, so that's fine). the
GWNN party was Saturday night and my friend Sir M (who goes to poly
group also) showed us his collection of toys and later demo'ed them
for me :) And then I got home to find my sweetie still awake & I got
lucky! ;P

Sunday we slept in. Sweetie made breakfast & coffee, and we ran some
errands, then went and saw "Amelie" at the drafthouse downtown Sunday
evening.

Monday I had breakfast & shopped with Aunt L, we went back to her place
to divvy the loot, then we called mom & talked to her for awhile (she
is realizing that Brother A does not recognize her efforts in his
direction, as far as quitting her job & coming to take care of the
new baby, talking about finding something closer so she can be there
for him,etc. Sad but gratifying)

Monday night, we had girls night out with the usual craft nite
bitches, but we went to dinner instead at this family style Italian
place. I never feel that good paying so much for Italian food, since
I can make it so much better & cheaper myself at home. But the
atmosphere was fun, the company was delightful, so I enjoyed that
very much.

As we were wrapping up the bill, Sweetie called & said he and Max were
headed out to Baskin Robbins, since Max wanted 31 scoops of ice cream
for his 31st birthday. I invited the gals to come with, and my friend
Nikiyoy took me up on it, so off we went to celebrate with Max. There
were 7 of us and we actually finished off the giant pile of ice
cream...that was so fun and entertaining. Some of the flavor
combinations (bubble gum and chocolate, strawberry and creme brulee)
were dreadful, but we laughed and ate it anyway. It was a hoot and a
half.

--- e wrote:

> From: "
> <e..
> To: "evilE (
> Subject: yoga
> Date: Mon, 17 Jan 2005 10:38:50 -0600
>
> I thought Saturday's class was amazing! I rode
> afterwards and I felt so
> limber, it was a great ride.
>
> So yoga this Saturday right? It is great, I get to
> do something really good
> for myself and see you! I may try to ride after yoga
> again, do you want to
> do lunch? Like 12:30 or 1pm? Maybe Austin Java?
>

here is my actual reply:

I did not realize that this upcoming weekend is the house & garden
show, so the only thing that would really work for me would be
hitting brunch directly after class.
==========
but I felt like saying something snarky like "gee, I'd love to starve
for 2 hours waiting for you to go to breakfast with me..."

2833Re: so, the weekend. , me to J, plus email from e.

Jan. 18, 2005
e wrote:

okay maybe brunch the weekend afterwards? I have a
friend in and I am dragging him to yoga :)
=======
-----Original Message-----
From: evilE
Sent: Tuesday, January 18, 2005 9:18 AM
To: e.
Subject: RE: yoga

I might be going to San Antonio that day, but if not,
I'll be at Yoga!
==============

ok so yoga Saturday and I will see if I can move some stuff around so
maybe brunch afterwards??? Yeah yoga! I am going to get another 8 or
12 class pass. She is such a good instructor. :)

comments

1890today

Tue, 25 Aug 2020 16:27:29 GMT

Jan. 28, 2004

boring
no J-Law to email
no skye_DS to ICQ with
no drama on LJ.

foo.

Wrote a letter of recommendation for Rio--she's apparently going to
try and get back into art classes & such. That would rock so much. I
emailed and snail mailed a copy of my letter of recommendation.

Um...that's about it.

there was an LJ meme about what would you do if you won the
powerball. We dont' have that in TX, but we do have mega millions &
lotto texas which are usually pretty big $$.

I really don't think I want to ever have that much money. Or at least
not _win_ it and have my name all over the newspapers & tx lottery
website. I just know it would bring the X family crawling back into my
life & other people I haven't even thought of for years.

A nice weekly grand scratch-off or 200K from the TX Two Step would be
nice, not big enough to get a lot of publicity, but enough to be
comfortable.

I had phone duty so I leave at 2:30.

I'm craving all sorts of things. Biscuits. Ham & swiss sandwich with
mayo, mustard & pickles sliced the long way. Beer.

I have $30 to see me through to payday.

1. snackies for craft nite tonight
2. poly dinner tomorrow
3. NK happy hour Friday (?)
4. Dinner & movie with Elena on Saturday (she will probably flake out
but it will be good to keep some $ on hand just in case)

comments

1827Hermity

Fri, 21 Aug 2020 16:13:25 GMT

Jan. 6, 2004

e. went out of the country on Dec. 18 or so and just got back,
apparently. She wants to go see ROTK on Friday, so I'm all like "just
tell me when & where, and I'll be there" and then she jumps on
with "we need to get tickets in advance and btw, do you want to go to
Wimberley on Sunday?" AGH!!!

So we are back to the when/where/what followed by FLAKE! fuckwittage
again. *sigh* I kind of missed the quiet. Not that I don't enjoy
spending time with her when I am actually _with_ her, but the
planning & flaking just exhausts me utterly.

I am really not motivated to see anyone or do anything. I don't know
if I'm just burned out from all the family togetherness over the
holidays or if this is my 'mode' now. Seems that all my efforts over
the last year+ to meet people and make friends really didn't
accomplish much in the way of making 'real' friends. Yes I go to
various group activities, but it has not led to any friendships one-
on-one outside of the group. Except for Stephanie, I guess. *sigh*

comments

2960icq w/thewordnerd

Thu, 20 Aug 2020 18:57:35 GMT

Feb. 17, 2005

thewordnerd: Hey. So, Saturday at 1?
evile: yup. I'll get you round 12:45 if that's cool.
thewordnerd: Yeah, that works.
evile: awesome :)
thewordnerd: So I assume you aren't yogaing this weekend?
evile: nope. I ought to, but since I know e. won't be there, I
probably won't bother to get up that early.
thewordnerd: Ah. Have you thought about finding another instructor, or is
it not a priority?
evile: not a priority
thewordnerd: Ah.
evile: e. is a terribly busy little flaky person, so we only see
each other at yoga. I don't think her schedule would allow her to do
it another time.
thewordnerd: I understand. Well, I'm glad she finally updated you on what
was happening.
evile: yup.
evile: I have yoga videos & DVDs, I can do Yoga at home if I want.
Heck, I could do Yoga at bull creek park.
thewordnerd: Heh, quite possibly. :)
evile: assuming a child or dog didn't pester me :P
thewordnerd: LOL
thewordnerd: Could climb up to that vista thing again, not many children or
dogs there. :)
evile: true. hassle to haul a blanket or yoga mat that far, though.
thewordnerd: Oh, right, I hadn't considered that.
evile: it's a little rocky to go without.
thewordnerd: Right. I'm not very familiar with yoga, su I wasn't sure if it
was something you did sitting/lying down, standing up or what.
evile: all of the above.
thewordnerd: Ah.
evile: when doing yoga outdoors, I usually stick to the standing
postures.
thewordnerd: Hmmm. I could see how that would be more difficult, though.
Uneven terrain and all.
evile: yes, a lot of yoga is balance,and standing on uneven ground
will challenge that, even without standing on one foot or whatever.
evile: If I think about it, I'll bring my yoga deck on Saturday
thewordnerd: Deck?
evile: yup, it's a deck of cards with different pose, breath, or
stretch on each one. and then a little meditation to go with each
pose. The meditations are kinda dumb, but the rest is cool..
thewordnerd: Oh, *that* kind of deck. I was thinking it didn't make sense
to cart around a deck if a blanket or mat would be too much. :)
evile: doh!
thewordnerd: Ah, just read that Nikiyoy wants to go hiking with us on
Saturday. Do we want to bump everything back until 2, just have a
longer lunch, or . . .
evile: I could do that. get you at 1:45 instead of 12:45. Or she
could meet us at the park. I guess I'll see what Niki wants to do.
thewordnerd: Ok, sounds good.
evile: Niki sounds a little stressed. Trying to work, have a life,
and go to school is tough.
thewordnerd: Yeah, I don't know how she does it.
thewordnerd: I couldn't.
evile: she's 21.
thewordnerd: How do you mean that? As in, it's easier for her because she's
younger?
evile: yup
thewordnerd: Ah. Hmmm, I'd think it would be more difficult. Younger people
typically aren't the responsible ones.
evile: more energy, though.
thewordnerd: Ah, good point.
thewordnerd: Speaking of more energy, that tylonol PM worked wonders. Made
me tired enough to go to sleep before midnight, but not tired enough
to still be out of it today. :) It rocks.
evile: excellent!
evile: The mucinex was also quite effective for me. I think we made
good choices :)
thewordnerd: Yep. Think I've finally got this sleep schedule thing under
control.
thewordnerd: Ah, good. Didn't get squicked out by thinking about the
commercial while you took it? :)
evile: It's important to stay on a schedule, keeps depression at
bay :)
evile: The packaging is so NOT like the commercials, I don't know
what they were thinking when they cooked that up.
thewordnerd: Ah, that's good. Are the commercials still being aired?
evile: I don't watch that much TV, but I haven't seen any lately.
They may have scrapped the Raid bug style altogether.
thewordnerd: Good! That is a very disgusting image, now that I recall it
again. :)
evile: I saw it in print ads more than on TV, actually. Haven't read
a magazine in a while.
thewordnerd: Oh, this is beautiful. Mom just forwarded me a job posting for
an English teaching position in Victoria. I wonder if she thought
*that* one out? :P
evile: bizarre!! Did she not notice the location??
thewordnerd: I can't imagine how she couldn't have. It's a Victoria College
job posting.
evile: wierd.
thewordnerd: The only way I could possibly take that position is to move
back in with them and commute with her, as she works for VC. But that
isn't happening. No way in hell.
evile: no. I think that's a very wise choice.
thewordnerd: I even wondered if it was an online teaching position, because
I think they do some online courses, but it only casually mentions
that possibility.
evile: I can't imagine them letting an untried teacher do an online
course right off the bat.
thewordnerd: And incidentally it begins this fall, when they're threatening
to sell the condo if I'm still unemployed. I just feel like
something's amiss here.
thewordnerd: Good point.
evile: I would definitely pursue your own job search over anything
she sends you.
thewordnerd: Oh, yes, definitely happening. I just don't like what they do,
and don't like looking for the hidden plot in their actions.
evile: yeah.
evile: oh, fuck. UB is letting me have it re: Kaleon. again. more. yay.
thewordnerd: What's going on now?
evile: apparently she is attempting damage control on Kaleon's very
old stories about their 'slave contract', and the physical abuse.
thewordnerd: Ok, one sec. UB is Skye_ds, right? And Kaleon is the guy who
just left? Sorry, just making sure I've got the cast straight.
evile: yup
evile: here is what I told her. I think I did good. " I know you've
hit sineater, and I know sineater has hit you. You choose to stay together in
spite of the violence, and I do believe you're working on it. It
distresses me to think of either of you being beat up, but it's your
life and your choice."
thewordnerd: That's good. Very direct.
thewordnerd: Has she responded?
evile: ugh. what a fuckin' nutjob. she quoted "a few good men" at me,
saying she didnt' defend herself at the time because "you can't
handle the truth"
evile: she also says I'm "all bark and no bite"
evile: I dont' think she realizes the only reason she's alive is
because my brother still loves her.
thewordnerd: Yikes. I just can't think of anything to say to that.
thewordnerd: It's just . . . just stupid. She's not even trying to work
with you, just being childish about it.
evile: yup. I guess it's good that she's getting it out of her
system..if it makes her feel better and keeps it from coming up again.
evile: goddamn goddamn. And my mother and aunt are picking me up from
work so I dont' have any time to decompress from her BS.
thewordnerd: Ewww. I hate it when that happens.
evile: me too.
evile: need a margarita.
thewordnerd: Good idea. Perhaps you should keep an emergency UB
decompression flask nearby at work.
evile: heh! I've got listerine, I guess that'd do in a pinch.
thewordnerd: LOL
evile: bleh. drill the hole, pour the bleach.
thewordnerd: :)
evile: Oh well. 20 more minutes and I'm out of here.
thewordnerd: Whee. What are you planning to do with the family?
evile: no clue.
thewordnerd: Hmmm.
evile: I'm sure it will be fine. If not, I've got to get home and get
to bed eventually, so whatever it is, I can tolerate it until then.
thewordnerd: Ah, yes, good point. Have they expressed an interest in this
weekend?
evile: nope.
evile: but no idea if that is because aunt Aunt L hasn't checked her
email or what. I'll mention it in person, as well.
thewordnerd: Ah, good idea.
evile: I am sure it will be interpreted as "I have plans and can't be
bothered with you at all"
thewordnerd: Hmmm. Is that a good thing from your perspective?
evile: no, because then it will be "why can't you make time for
me/family?"
thewordnerd: Ah. Ick, that sucks.
evile: whereas what I"m saying is "I've made X plans with Y people,
but I'm free Z time, and you're more than welcome to join me for all
of the X things I'm doing"
thewordnerd: I'm sorta wondering if I'm going to get the parental phonecall
tomorrow about them dropping by this weekend, so I guess I'm kinda in
the same boat.
evile: too bad for them, if you're doing something else and not home
when they come!
thewordnerd: Heh, indeed. :)
evile: 8 minute....
thewordnerd: Yaaay. :)
evile: I wish it was Friday....
thewordnerd: Yeah, me too. I like my weekends.
evile: I have a 3 day weekend this weekend, should make my mom happy
that I have Monday to mostly spend with her.
thewordnerd: Yeah, that's a generous bit of time to grant her.
evile: we have an appointment with our accountant Monday morning, but
after that I should be free.
evile: I may or may not have a car to drive Monday, but I guess we'll
see.
thewordnerd: And theoretically she'll be close, so it wouldn't be difficult
for her to come and visit you from time to time. Hopefully she
understands that if you don't spend every waking minute with her this
weekend you'll still have a chance to see her.
evile: I hope so.
evile: yay, time to go home. *hugs* thanks for letting me vent. You
rock :)
thewordnerd: Hey, no problem. Good luck, have fun with the family.
evile: yeah, right.

comments

2905the weekend so far

Thu, 20 Aug 2020 16:01:01 GMT

Feb. 6, 2005

I saw Sharjinka's new place last night. She is remarkably unpacked for
having moved just last weekend! It's an odd house. Small, but very
open, marble (or marble-look) floors, lots of homemade-looking wood
accents, dowels which will either break or require dusting or both,
study with homemade wood walls & lots of etched-glass windows with
horses and tropical birds, one big stained glass eagle (yum, brown
glass), and one square panel using shells and glass nuggets that was
nice, but didn't really go with the tropical birds and horses theme
(Skye_ds is gonna love the study, I thought it was tacky) lots of mirrors,
tiny bathroom, very little storage space in bathroom or sink/grooming
area outside of potty/bath with a door that closes between them. I,
of course, asked the important question: "where ya gonna put the hot
tub?" We had a nice visit about HFS and tarot and school,
archaeology, etc. She calls the HFS people "kids" and talked about
going out with her guy JG & his adult friends & not quite knowing
how to fit in. It was sad, interesting. Talked about Skye_ds being offended
when she told her she didn't believe in Tarot, that A is always
offering to do readings for her, segued without me realizing it at
first into talking about going to a professional psychic at a faire &
not getting a good reading from her. Talked about her dead uncle Jim
& her grandfather & really wishing there was a way to communcate with
them.

Julie C. and her boyfriend were due at 9, but didn't show up until
sometime between 10:30 and 11. Her boyfriend JH was kind of loud &
nerdy, apparently wanted the female attention, and kind of
interrupted what would have been a good gal-vibe if it had just been
me, Jinx, and Julie. They walked in the door and I hugged Julie
right away. I could tell she didnt know exactly who I was at first,
and then when she realized 'oh it's bramblekite' (she and I know each
ohter from LJ and email, both know Michelle in RL and she liked my
comments on her LJ, and rest is history so to speak. She was lil_lamb
and now she's naughty_zoot) then it was no longer this strange woman
hugging on her. That was kind of funny. She was cute and round, but
very pretty, with shoulder length brown hair and big brown eyes. I
was really just enchanted by the wicked little sparkle in her eyes.
JH is supposedly her Dom, but he did not give off the calm "Dom" vibe
I have seen in Andy and Sir Michael. He was just too 'pay attention
to me'. We had a nice, but short visit. We laughed at Happy Bunny
stuff (Jinx has a calendar, shot glasses, and coasters with Happy
Bunny stuff) and talked about SCA and whatnot. I left early, I had a
rotten sinus headache & had to go to bed early for Yoga on Saturday.

Yoga was good. The regular instructor Lori, is one that Elena just
loves and adores. I'm not that impressed with her, but whatever. I
go, I see Elena and Victoria and it's good for me.

The instructor filling in for Lori today and next Saturday is
Heather, and she is faboo. I felt she was much more respectful of the
physical problems and limits mentioned by class members at the
beginning of class, while still giving us plenty of work to do. (abs!
wow!)

I need to start bringing my own blanket, though. All the ones in the
classroom set smelled like feet.

After we got done with Yoga, Elena went off to pre-ride a trail for a
mountain bike race Sunday, and I went and ran some errands, including
the PO box. I got a nice care package from Sister H. I really love her
sense of humor, it's whimsical and sweet. She did send me a card that
said "The Blanton" in white on orange on one side,and then "Breeder,
screecher, ruiner of occasions," and a phone number that spelled
out "oh, you'll hate me too" on the other side. That's pretty harsh
for Sister H. There was a card she made with a picture of a wombat on
it, too. Very cute. The pictures of the kid holding the badger and
the 'cheese doors' on the envelope must have been entertaining for
the postal service. It was just very cute and fun.

I didn't make it to the Brigid fest at the Vortex. Sweetie and I ran
errants. Highland Mall for Godiva Valentine Truffles, Lowes for stuff
for Tom to make his TV projector screen, Costco for allergy meds,
apples, etc. and then back home. I washed up and made salad and then
headed off to Niki's. She made Jambalaya and we had supper & talked
about stuff. Turned out she'd gotten the wrong size boots when she
went to Hot Topic earlier that day, so we had to go back there. onyxlynxx
wanted to carpool with us, so we got her first, and went by the mall.
Then I had to stop for gas.

We got out to the Voyager party at 8:15 or so, and I felt immediately
shy and out of place, even though I knew Bill, Andy, Jadey, and most
of the party guests by sight... This girl who works in my building &
recently started in our clerical unit was there with her boyfriend.
ICKS. I got a cup of mulled wine and then we went and watched the
mummification demo, and I got pulled in by Sam, the Dom giving the
demo, to help with duct taping his sub. That was kind of fun, but
took a long time, so onyxlynxx and Niki wandered off before it was done.
He started with a layer of cling wrap over the whole person, then
regular gray/silver duct tape on the back, and then decorative duct
tape on the front, including clear over the nipples and genitals. A
bit later, I tracked down Niki and onyxlynxx and we were gonna go play
with my new spoon, and Sam found me and said he needed to find Ken,
and would I watch his sub? So I went in to the darkened room where
the sub was laying on a padded mat, listening to a CD and breathing
deeply. I think he was having a really nice experience. I sat and
watched him until Sam came back. It was nice to be entrusted with
that but of course kind of annoying to be dragged away from my gals
like that.

We went upstairs where the swing is and I tried out my spoon on Niki
and onyxlynxx. They were both on hands and knees and I whacked each of
their butts a few times. It was fun, but I felt totally stupid doing
it. I have no clue about this stuff. I wanted them to enjoy it, but I
didn't really know what I was doing. So I quit. A couple of pervs
came up the stairs, i guess because they heard the whacks & onyxlynxx and
Niki laughing. Andy started playing with Jadey, using the swing hook
to suspend her while he used various implements on her. It was
interesting, and Andy is very capable, but onyxlynxx mentioned she was
going to try and go to work the next day and I was kind of tired, so
we unhooked Niki from her new cuffs and ankle-cuffs and went on home.

It wasn't a great night, but it was OK. I enjoyed spending time
w/onyxlynxx and Niki, anyway.

comments

3072 weekend, eclipse, etc

Tue, 12 May 2020 16:53:05 GMT

Apr. 4, 2005

Saturday was YOga and then Wimberley with e. I think she was a
tad disappointed by trade days, but oh well. I had a nice time. Got a
nice egg-shaped bit of Madagascar Quartz, it's very clear and just
really neat.

Sunday I went to Excalibur & took Nolan. We met up with Rengeek & Loa,
and Pam and her new guy (whose name I can't remember for the life of
me. It's like Doyle or something like that.)

Saw the B.Bards & Whipboy, the final pub sing and then went home.
Nice day, nice weekend.

I got some sun, but I don' tthink I burned.

This Friday is the new moon & a partial lunar eclipse around 5 pm. I
am thinking good banishing magic that day.

http://sunearth.gsfc.nasa.gov/eclipse/SEmono/HSE2005/PSE2005.html

The next eclipse is May 12, 2012. I think the world is going to end
on my 42nd birthday. What fun! I should be someplace REALLLY Cool for
that.

comments

EJ entries Aug. 19, 2003

Sun, 10 May 2020 20:05:01 GMT

1572fuckwittage with e

Expand Messages

evilE

Aug. 19, 2003

--- e wrote:

Subject: Water Fun Sunday
Date: Tue, 19 Aug 2003 09:39:24 -0500

---------------------------------

Hola non-biking friends,

You both have suggested interested in playing in the
water. I am planning on going to either Barton Springs
(more likely of the two) or Hamilton's Pool Sunday
afternoon for some nice relaxing, cool, wet fun and I
wanted to see you. Either one or both of you
interested in joining me? If so please let me know a
good time for you.

=)

e

===============================================
Forwarded to J-Law with this message:

Date: Tue, 19 Aug 2003 09:45:24 -0700 (PDT)
From: e
Subject: Fwd: Water Fun Sunday
To: J-Law

Argh. I dont' know why I even bother. This all started
with "Wanna do a girls night out on Friday or
Saturday?"....so I said Friday would be best for me
(was thinking of going to the beach or at least
swimming somewhere out of town on Saturday)...so this
is her final plan from all that, apparently.

It is not a "Night", It is not on Friday or Saturday.
So why the FUCK did she even bother asking for input
on when/where? And, more importantly, WHY DO I KEEP
BOTHERING?

Anyhoo...how is your Tuesday going?

Sweetie is working on about day 2 or 3 of not brushing his
hair, day 5 of not-bathing and not wearing clean
clothes, and it's been at least a week since he
shaved. I am sorry he is unemployed & feeling bad
about himself, but this is just getting NASTY. WTF. I
have been out of work before, but at least I was
clean, if depressed and miserable & self-hating.

=E

1573Re: fuckwittage with e

Aug. 19, 2003

Date: Tue, 19 Aug 2003 10:22:42 -0700 (PDT)
From: J
Subject: Re: Fwd: Water Fun Sunday
To: me

I have one thing to say re: e, which is: "Non-biking
friends" ?!?!?!?!?!? She could just as easily say, "less interesting
friends," "non-real friends" .....

I am very sorry to hear about Sweetie's weirdness - that must be so hard
to deal with. *hug* I am hoping things get better for both your
sakes.

My Tuesday is going okay - a little slow, actually, but in kind of a
scary way. Like, there's something I could/should be doing but
somehow forgot or ?? At least I can take a few moments to pack,
though - I've hardly done anything on that front.

Upside: I found a job listing for the Courts Editor of Law.com,
which is a legal news, etc. website geared primarily toward lawyers.
It's been around for awhile (not like a .com startup). It sounds
pretty cool. The headline is: Have a law degree but don't want to
practice? Uh, yeah. Better finish up my resume before things get
nutty.

XOXOXO! Love you!

comments

EJ - Aug 4 2003

Sat, 09 May 2020 20:58:33 GMT

1551 My weekend

Aug. 4, 2003

My weekend was OK. Went tasting at Spicewood
Vineyards. e. didn't like any of the wines we
tried, kept talking about some Portugese sparkling
white she'd had that was her favorite and nothing in
here tastes like that, wah wah, bla bla. Mind you, one
of the the _owners_ was giving us the tour and
tasting, and the other owner joined us in the tasting
room. Totally rude, that Miss e. Nothing at the
vineyard was 'knock your socks off' GREAT or anything
but it was all nice. I got a bottle of the Bluebonnet
Blush & a bottle of their latest blend, called
"Medea"--a really nice red. I know how some folks feel
about blends, but *I* liked it & the owner said it
would age very nicely & be really yummy in a couple
years. So...anyway.

Max & Sweetie met up with us at Krause Springs. e went
into the water once and then just sat there the rest
of the time, finally said she had to go around 5:15 in
order to be ready for an 8pm date with a guy she has
seen 3x and expects to 'know' what she wants [they had
no plans, other than him coming into town. So he
talked to an old college bud who lives in Austin &
suggested that college bud, his wife, & him & Elena go
out for dinner and drinks. She was all pissed off
because she wanted to spend time with just him, not
those strangers!] I told her she should tell him how
she feels & ask him not to commit her to things
without discussing it first.

Her thing that she says with every new guy was "I
shouldn't have to ask!"...well, she's doomed to be
single forever if she keeps up with that bullshit.

She had also asked me to bring my tarot cards (she
does this EVERY time we make plans to hang out) but
luckily, the day passed without her remembering about
them & havng me do a reading. So annoying. Makes me
feel used.

Krause Springs itself is a GREAT little oasis--there's
a clubhouse up at the entrance, a nice courtyard with
GIANT windchimes, a manmade pool that is spring-fed,
and then you go down a hill & there's the natural
pool--waterfall, ferns, nice cold water! GORGEOUS.
Swimming is $3 for the day, and then you can camp
overnight for $6. Totally worth it. Gorgeous. Next
time you come out, if it's warm enough, we'll go.

Sunday, I went out to Dreckmore & was offended, bored,
offended again, then bored again, so I left. Chris/Goofy told me I
looked "gay" as soon as I walked up. I sat & visited, anyway, even
though that was offensive. A bit later, some redneck in a pickup drove
by and yelled "faggots!". Um...yes, I enjoy men sexually. How
perverted of me. I dunno...what does it even mean for a woman to be
called a faggot? So, anyway, it was boring, it was hot, so I left.
Made dinner for me & Sweetie & we watched Aria.

Hopefully today will fly. I am tired--did not sleep well last night.
I feel like I'm too young for hot flashes, but I keep waking up
soaked in sweat, seeing 'afterimage' type flashes of light, then
kicking off the covers, freezing, and starting over. It SUCKS. I
should probably talk to useless Dr. Davis about it.
------------------

Dreamt about going to dave & busters (with Rio?), the entryway was
full of vegetable-type grocery store cases with all these cuts of
meat & wierd mushrooms & stuff. Not covered, and not cold enough to
really keep the meat from going bad. It was weird.

1552 Spicewood Vineyards

Aug. 4, 2003

What impressed me about Spicewood is that *everything*
they make is estate bottled. Very rare in TX wineries,
most of them can't produce enough grapes to do that
yet. Nothing they had was un-drinkable. Lots of it
would have been excellent with food. I was impressed
with their setup & their knowledge, they were
super-nice and I just really liked the tour & tasting.
They host monthly suppers in the spring & fall,
featuring Texas chefs pairing stuff with their wines.
They also host Spicewood Chamber concerts & other
local organizations. I think that's so cool, they
support their community, they spotlight other Texas
artists & craftspeople...that is, to me, just the
ESSENCE of what life should be all about. Doing what
you love. Helping your community. Bringing beautiful
sensory experiences to people.

comments

EJ

Thu, 07 May 2020 22:40:43 GMT

1298 the weekend

Mar. 24, 2003

sat: excalibur. saw Sharjinka from hfs. visited w/pat & james. got a
tarot reading from pat ($20!) she says for 2 wks tom will be
wallowing & feeling sorry for himself but once he gets thru that he
will be fine. then he'll have another job in 2 months, making moer $.
and that I'm getting a raise (haha). had 2 songs in her head during
the reading: puddin & pie, something? and 'incense & peppermints'--
something about the year that came out was important to me. ?

hm

http://www.webfitz.com/lyrics/Lyrics/1967/451967.html

Incense and Peppermints
The Strawberry Alarm Clock
1967

(Ed King - John Carter)

Good sense, innocence, cripplin' mankind
Dead kings, many things I can't define
Occasions, persuasions clutter your mind
Incense and peppermints, the color of time

Who cares what games we choose?
Little to win but nothin' to lose

Incense and peppermints, meaningless nouns
Turn on, tune in, turn your eyes around

Look at yourself, look at yourself, yeah, yeah
Look at yourself, look at yourself, yeah, yeah, yeah!

To divide this cockeyed world in two
Throw your pride to one side, it's the least you can do
Beatniks and politics, nothing is new
A yardstick for lunatics, one point of view

Who cares what games we choose?
Little to win but nothin' to lose

------ instrumental break ------

Good sense, innocence, cripplin' mankind
Dead kings, many things I can't define
Occasions, persuasions clutter your mind
Incense and peppermints, the color of time

Who cares what games we choose?
Little to win but nothin' to lose

Incense and peppermints
Incense and peppermints

Sha la la
Sha la la
Sha la la
Sha la la
Sha la la [fade]

1299Re: the weekend

Mar. 24, 2003

my email to J-Law:
================================

e. flaked on Friday (oh, amazement!) We were
emailing back & forth all day on what to do, where to
go, and such, and then around 2 or so, she ceased to
return email. I got home, no msg. on the machine, no
msg. on my cell, no further email. I hung out at home
& watched TV till 7, then Sweetie & I went to dinner & the
dollar movies ("Catch Me if You Can" was a really cute
movie, BTW).

Yes, I suppose I could have called her...so that makes
me partially responsible for the flake-age, I suppose.

She called the house around 7:45, when we were at
dinner (I had my cell on me, it never rang) & left a
message on my machine.

Then she called the house Saturday at some ungodly
hour (I hate cordless phones--the one by the bed rang
but the actual handset was out in the kitchen where
Sweetie left it, so he went blundering out of bed to try
and answer it, and I just put my head under the
pillow)--anyway her message was that she was 'worried'
about me.

What. ever.

Anyway, had a nice time at Excalibur faire Saturday &
stopped by Natural Magic on my way home sat. evening &
listened to music. It was wierd to be both places as a
patron rather than a vendor...but it was nice not to
have any responsibilities. I stopped by the booths of
people I knew (NOT my white trash booth neighbors [fair e flowers]from
last year), got a tarot reading from my friend Pat,
AKA Madame Fatima(she gave me LOTS of business last
yr, so even though I can read my own cards, I thought
it would be good to return the favor) ...it was a nice
day. btw: Pat's reading said that Sweetie was going to
feel sorry for himself & wallow for 2 wks, then get
his act together & have a new, better paying job
within 2 months, and that I am getting a raise within
the same time frame.(haha) But it was nice to get
'good' news, even if it's total BS.

Sunday I went to the home & garden show with Lynn
& Bob. It was cool. I got lots of ideas.
=
saw Janet & Eric from NK, she had a space there with her fountains &
stuff.

then went to Ross with Lynn, got a pilates/yoga mat, ball & video for
$24.99!

got home around 6:00, didn't go to PNO classic, just hung out
w/Sweetie. Made tuna helper & drank beer,w atched part of a jurassic
park sequel. got lucky!!

1300email w/Kaleon , BTW

Mar. 24, 2003

Date: Fri, 21 Mar 2003 08:19:22 -0800 (PST)
From:E
Subject: The end of the world?
To:JP

I bought a Dixie Chicks CD (to support what they said
about Dubya) and *I actually Like it!!*

Hope all is well with you.

=E
-----------------------------
From: JP
To: E
Date: Sat, 22 Mar 2003 02:52:58 +0800
Subject: Re: The end of the world?

lol, sorry...hehe

They really aren't all that bad, I can't listen to them 24/7, but now
and then they're a refreshing change.

Kaleon
--

====================================
Date: Fri, 21 Mar 2003 12:38:28 -0800 (PST)
From: E
Subject: Re: The end of the world?
To: JP
If it's not pouring buckets tomorrow,I'm going to
Excalibur faire, probably leaving around 1pm-ish.

let me know if you're interested in
carpooling/caravaning/meeting me there/whatever.

-E
================================
From: JP
To: E
Date: Sat, 22 Mar 2003 06:06:28 +0800
Subject: Re: The end of the world?

Going to a movie tomorrow, then to a big birthday bash at a friend's
house.

j.
--

==============================
Date: Fri, 21 Mar 2003 14:16:17 -0800 (PST)
From: E
Subject: Re: The end of the world?
To: JP

Okeydoke.

1301Re: the weekend

Mar. 24, 2003

J-Law's reply:

Hey - not your fault - you were keeping up your end. If she let it
drop and didn't get back to you before you were sposta go, then
T.S. I find it decidedly convenient (for e) that she stopped
emailing, didn't call your cell, and left an "I'm Worried" msg at
home. So, she gets to look like the concerned friend, flake at the
same time, and leave the impression on you that you might have
flaked.

Which you didn't.

Sounds like an otherwise lovely weekend, though

comments

1224 stuff, scopes

Wed, 06 May 2020 22:54:53 GMT

Feb. 23, 2003

I have totally lost my 3rd quarter sales tax return...but I got the
rest of the shit together. Feh feh feh. I hate tax shit. Worked on it
on and off from noon to aobut 6 yesterday, then went to bed early. No
fun. Also did laundry. Need to clean house, big time.

Went to a party Friday with e at Mark's house. He has a nice
house. All of Elena's friends are pricks--grownup frat boys and so-
ho's. JUst dreadful people. Some newly engaged couple came to the
party--they are going to get married after some 60 mile mt. bike race
in June. feh. They brought their cousin so-and-so and he cornered me
and told me how much he likes Jane Austen, cats, and his dad is
emotionally distant and always ponders every situation with "what
would Harry S Truman do?"...ugh.

I read the tarot cards for her twice--very little money stuff, mostly
spiritual and emotional issues for her. She needs to get out and
network more.

I read the cards for me last night, like what Monday is gonna be
like and it's bad. 5 of cups was the 'watch word' for the day, which
means basically submitting to misfortune and realizing that shit is
shit.

Feh.
====================================================
Scopes:

Taurus
Horoscope (by Astrocenter.com)
This is definitely not a good day to stay home and do household
chores, dear Taurus. If you do, some sad and rather irrational
thoughts may plague you throughout the day. No matter what the
weather's like, it would be far better to get out and do anything
that would keep your mind focused on something positive. Go shopping,
attend a sports event, see a movie, or visit a friend. Whatever you
do, get your mind off yourself. Go enjoy your day.

Gemini
Horoscope (by Astrocenter.com)
Some disappointing news could put you into a rather gloomy state at
some point today, dear Gemini. Someone close to you may suddenly have
to leave town for several weeks, and you'll be lonely without them.
There's not much point in dwelling on this, however. You'll just have
to stay in touch via phone or email and look forward to the time when
your friend comes back. You should be pretty busy during those days,
anyway!

personalized scope:

Erika
Sun Sign: Taurus
Rising Sign: Sagittarius

Today, Erika, you may be feeling a bit out of sorts. You are not
sick, just exhausted from the efforts you have been putting in at
work lately. This is a sure sign of stress, and an indicator that you
are due a true day off - from chores, personal projects, the works!
Forget the workload you had planned for the day. If you rest and
relax everything not finished today will be accomplished in no time
tomorrow. So take the day off - you need it!

Your Rising Sign

You are likely to get wrapped up in the concerns of your family at
this time. People who don't even know you will be able to see from
your face that there is indeed something brewing just below the
surface. Do what you can to resolve these issues before you engage
yourself fully with the people around you. Approach things with a
clear mind, drawing on the help of today's square between the Sun and
the Moon.

comments

1088 Re: Reflections & resolutions

Tue, 11 Feb 2020 18:00:18 GMT

> (something about not talking behind peoples backs)

Nope.

> Also, I might tackle all the unfinished projects that are in my

work room.

Nope.

> Additionally, I might learn to use my inline skates and tootle

around the neighborhood...

Nope

> And if I did lose 40 or 50 pounds I wouldn't cry about it.

Lost about 26. Regained...maybe 6-8. haven't weighed in since right
after the cruise.

> And I am really going to try and get out of credit card debt hell

this year.

Nope.
====================================
This year:

Spend more time w/friends (xtal, elena,etc.)

Throw some parties

Weigh 150 for my 33rd bday

*really* work on credit card debt.

comments