evile

3558Girls Night

2025-02-13T23:27:20Z

Sep. 20, 2005

Me, [cousin B], Terri, onyxlynxx, funnygirlkawaii, maggiemaepisces, nikiyoy, kulilinei.

Me, [cousin B] Terri and onyxlynxx went to Yoga Yoga northwest. They didn't give
Terri a hard time about wearing shoes in class. Our teacher, Charlie,
was a skinny older British guy, bad BO, who asked us all first thing
if we went to Body Choir...at that point, we should have known we
were in trouble. He kept correcting [cousin B] all thru class...and at one
point said "your pants are confusing me" (I think because they were
baggy & the instructor couldn't see exactly how he had his legs, but
it was hilarious anyway)

The classroom was hideously warm, too. It was dreadful. Lots of
downward dog, my hands went numb partway thru class. I didn't like it.

onyxlynxx & I are talking about going to class on Sunday mornings, maybe,
once her schedule gets changed. I'm just going to use up the rest of
this pass and then go on to Krav Maga. onyxlynxx mentioned a family
martial arts class at Sun Dragon. We might try that out once. I think
I'll like Krav Maga better.

After that, we went to Mangia, where maggiemaepisces, nikiyoy, kulilinei, and funnygirlkawaii
were already seated. nikiyoy, kulilinei, and [cousin B] shared a pizza. I don't
know if funnygirlkawaii ever got her order right.

After that we went to Ben & Jerry's and got ice cream. sonar0m
(Skye_ds's lover) and his parents came in and I gave sonar0m a tiny
hard time "Oh, NOW you're speaking to me!" and greeted his parents
with a cheery "HI, sonar0m' parents! I'm the dreadful Sister In Law
you've heard so many terrible things about!" it was kinda fun.

AFter that, I took Terri home & [cousin B] & I went to the Arboretum &
walked around. We snuck into the hotel's indoor water area and went
hot tubbing and swimming in our underwear. That was awesome & fun. We
also went down into the woods a bit, [cousin B] lost his wallet and we had
to hunt for it which made us late getting him home. Not good. (OTOH,
he wasn't mean or nasty to me as a result of losing it, and I wasn't
mean or nasty to him....so that was refreshing.)

I didn't get to sleep until a bit after midnight, but it was still
great fun. [cousin B] and I have the best adventures.

comments

3688horoscopey stuff

2023-12-06T23:23:05Z

Oct. 24, 2005

http://www.0800-horoscope.com/birthchart.php

Zodiac in degrees 0.00 Placidus Orb:0

Sun Taurus 29.40 Ascendant Sagittarius 19.23
Moon Scorpio 29.17 II Capricorn 23.29
Mercury Taurus 13.15 R III Pisces 1.26
Venus Gemini 28.14 IV Aries 6.37
Mars Gemini 21.55 V Taurus 5.10
Jupiter Libra 27.41 R VI Taurus 28.28
Saturn Taurus 14.27 VII Gemini 19.23
Uranus Libra 4.52 R VIII Cancer 23.29
Neptune Scorpio 29.31 R IX Virgo 1.26
Pluto Virgo 24.45 R Midheaven Libra 6.37
Lilith Leo 18.16 XI Scorpio 5.10
Asc node Pisces 8.22 XII Scorpio 28.28
AstroMart Internet version 2, (c) F. Burns 2002

The planetary positions in the houses express the facts relative to
destiny.

Planets in the houses

Sun in VI
Moon in XII
Mercury in V
Venus in VII
Mars in VII
Jupiter in Midheaven
Saturn in V
Uranus in IX
Neptune in XII
Pluto in IX
Lilith in VIII
Asc node in III

----------------------------------------------------------------------
----------

Here is now the interpretative analysis of your birth chart. It goes
over the various items in the previous tables and explains what it
means for you. The planetary aspects are also explained further on.

If you'd like to get a clearer and easier to understand birth chart,
then please use the Merlin Natal Report.

You can also get additional information through this interactive
feature:

today's transits (horoscope for today)
astrology previsions (14 days)
compatibility with your partner
Birth Chart
This birth chart shows the positions of the planets

The planets in the signs

The position of the planets in the signs of the Zodiac has an
influence on the character of the individual and these influences
form a large part of the individual psyche.

Sun in Taurus

She is strong-willed and conceited. She has charm, and is tolerant
and stoical. She likes pleasure and the good things of Life.
Appreciates the Arts.

Weaknesses: obstinacy, laziness. She is too materialistic, and is a
snob. She is greedy and proud.

Moon in Scorpio

Courageous, brave, independent, not a fearful nature. The type of
sensual woman who likes eroticism.

Weaknesses: excesses of pleasures of the flesh, sensual delights and
sensuality.

Mercury in Taurus

She is faithful to her ideas, unchangeable and opinionated,
persistent, but discreet. Likes all the pleasures Life can offer. She
is sometimes naive.

Weaknesses: stubborn, obstinate, withdrawn. Slow to react.

Venus in Gemini

"Gift of the gab", always finds the right expression. A good talker,
refined, with a love of the Arts. Two-sided in emotional affairs,
flirtatious. Superficial emotions. Countless and inconstant love
affairs. Likes to play love games.

Weaknesses: Instability and fickleness in love. Often goes too far in
love because of the desire to flirt and play on the other person, who
will often suffer - but that is not her problem. Inconstant in love,
which is ephemeral; she is unfaithful and can sometimes speak
caustically.

Mars in Gemini

She speaks a lot, likes to spar verbally, discussions, disputes,
polemic, criticism.

Weaknesses: she scolds and declaims. Words can be bitter and
aggressive.

Jupiter in Libra

A high liver with a sweet, attractive and sunny disposition. Likes
justice, which she trusts. She knows how to forgive completely.

Weaknesses: she can have problems, because she gets involved in
doubtful situations through trusting too much.

Saturn in Taurus

Slow but persistent in action. Perseverance of effort, assiduity, in
a regular and set manner.

Weaknesses: she perseveres, insisting on her way but is intransigent.
Not very expansive.

Uranus in Libra

Well-developed artistic leanings. Her balance can be upset by too
great an independence.

Neptune in Scorpio

Investigation, inquiry, secrets.

Pluto in Virgo

Takes away her shyness.

Sign and ascendant

Taurus ascendant Sagittarius

The planets in the houses

The planetary positions in the houses express the facts relative to
destiny.

Sun in VI

Not much social ambition, she wants to work in the medical
environment and progress step by step.

Moon in XII

Curious and inquisitorial nature. She likes peace and quiet, being
alone.

Mercury in V

Taste for intellectual games, sports that require skill and finesse.
She is very curious about everything, even in love. She likes
children.

Venus in VII

Her fate depends a lot on marriage. Marries for love, children, happy
emotional life.

Mars in VII

She dominates her associates, colleagues. She is the same in love
life, dominating the spouse and this makes for a stormy relationship
in prospect.

Jupiter in X

She cannot adapt to a humdrum or an uncertain life. She likes
comfort. She can move towards a managerial position, of prestige. Her
success follows on from that of the parents or in her home town.

Saturn in V

She likes method, calculation, concentration. She is not drawn
towards amusements, or pleasure in general. She has few friends, but
has deep and sincere feelings. She is serious in everything.

Uranus in IX

Interested in humanity. She is highly intellectual. She travels a
lot. Her mind is always alert, even when sleeping, during which time
she often resolves the problems of the previous day.

Neptune in XII

She likes isolation, a withdrawn life, dreams and meditation. She has
little desire for action.

The houses in the signs

Ascendant in Sagittarius

She will have an intellectual profession. Teaching, research,
philosophy, mathematics. Children will be a source of happiness and
pride.

House II in Capricorn

Success in professional life will be long and laborious. Continuously
working towards it, she will finally achieve universally acknowledged
success.

House III in Pisces

Ideas are somewhat changeable, and her humor as well. Travel, sea
voyages or work connected with the sea.

House IV in Aries

Lots of authority within the family. She knows how to take the
destiny of the family in hand. She is very energetic, very strong,
knowing how to cope with life's setbacks.

House V in Taurus

A pleasant home, a charming husband, loving and sweet children, nice
little meals, pleasant evenings with the loved one, that's the good
life.

House VI in Taurus

Completely trusted at work. Knows how to keep a secret and is of
irreproachable honesty. Weak point: the throat.

House VII in Gemini

Marries quite young, and divorces later. A second marriage doubtless
with less passion but a lot of friendship. Frightened of living alone
in old age.

House VIII in Cancer

Small inheritances.

House IX in Virgo

She is devoted to all causes that bring comfort or help to people in
difficulty.

House X in Libra

Contacts of all kinds will lead to social success, professional,
through marriage etc... Likes society life, friendships that could
help professionally. Sometimes jobs connected with justice, but
always involved with important and influential people.

House XI in Scorpio

Adores to debate endlessly with friends who don't share her ideas.
The discussion can lead to words, even a certain verbal violence.

House XII in Scorpio

Work in the police field, likes investigating other people's private
lives.

Interplanetary aspects

The interplanetary aspects have a strong influence on the character
and disposition of the individual and, consequently, on her destiny.

The conjunction aspect is variable and depends above all on the
nature of the conjoint planets.

423 Conjunction Mercury - Saturn

If you'd like to get a clearer and easier to understand birth chart,
then please use the Merlin Natal Report.

You can also get additional information through this interactive
feature:

today's transits (horoscope for today)
astrology previsions (14 days)
compatibility with your partner

Aspects

Planet Aspect Planet Orb/Value
Sun Opposition Moon 0.22 -182
Sun Trine Uranus 5.12 45
Sun Opposition Neptune 0.08 -236
Sun Trine Pluto 4.54 43
Sun Trine Midheaven 6.58 13
Moon Conjunction Neptune 0.14 215
Mercury Conjunction Saturn 1.12 423
Venus Conjunction Mars 6.19 191
Venus Trine Jupiter 0.34 112
Venus Square Pluto 3.29 -34
Venus Opposition Ascendant 8.51 -2
Mars Trine Jupiter 5.45 31
Mars Square Pluto 2.50 -37
Mars Opposition Ascendant 2.32 -86
Uranus Conjunction Midheaven 1.45 99
Pluto Square Ascendant 5.22 -1
1172 -578 594

Sign types & asteroids

Signs masculine 4 Signs of fire 0
Signs feminine 6 Signs of earth 4
Signs cardinals 2 Signs of air 4
Signs fixed 5 Signs of water 2
Signs mutable 3
Chiron Aries 8.59
Ceres Aries 14.53
Pallas Pisces 10.37
Juno Aries 10.32
Vesta Leo 22.03
Fortune Gemini 19.01
South node Virgo 8.22

If you'd like to get a clearer and easier to understand birth chart,
then please use the Merlin Natal Report.

comments

3671Full moon

2023-08-28T20:31:50Z

Oct. 19, 2005

btw, Sweetie & I had what felt to me like the usual 'sleepy wake up' sex
Monday a.m. and he prononuced it 'HOT!' afterwards.

Sex later, also reported by him, as mind numbingly hot.

I felt good & enjoyed it, but it wasn't hotter than usual, IMHO. Maybe
I just had a lot of Goddess Energy that the guy got the benefit of :)

I should work on getting God Energy into my male partner :)

comments

3668Potential drama on Thursday

2023-08-25T22:49:59Z

Oct. 19, 2005

foodies question
bramblekite
2005-10-17 05:46 pm
The nice Ararat lady emailed me and said there was a foodies dinner
at Ararat on Thursday the 20th, but she didn't say what time it
started or if reservations were required.

Do you have any info, since you're on all the cool kids' mailing
lists and all?

Thanks :)
=====================

Re: foodies question
terriblelynne
2005-10-17 05:59 pm
Like Foodies need an excuse to eat, drink and watch belly dancers.
We don't, but since we have one, let's get together in Ararat's
backyard next Thursday, October 20th from 7 10:00PM.

Here's the schedule.

Mezzes out on buffet at arrival
Hummus, baba ghanouj, maust museer, raw veggies and hot pita bread
Entrees served at 7:45PM
Veggie casserole, roasted lamb, beef stew, grilled veggies, persian
rice, hot tomato sauce, maust museer and hot pida bread
Desserts served after dinner buffet - baklava and choclava
Entertainment
Belly dancing by Yamina - 7:30ish
Belly dancing by Tashar - 8:30ish
Fire dancing by Tashar - 9:15ish
$15.00 - RSVP - a very nice thing

The last Ararat event was a beautiful evening. Remember Ararat is
lesbian owned and operated. Thank you Kelly for planning an amazing
menu and evening. I can't think of a better way to unite and
celebrate community.

Ararat
111 East North Loop
www.araratrestaurant.net

Thank you and good night,

Kitty
beatsagogo@aol.com (i _think_ that's the email to rsvp...lemme know
if it bounces)

============

Re: foodies question
bramblekite
2005-10-17 06:15 pm UTC (link)
OMG, how much do you RAWK!??

Thanks so much. I have email in to Karen at Ararat, too, so I hope
that between the two of 'em I'll get the RSVP in. (& hopefully I
don't have to be a pre-existing 'foodie' member? *worry*)

:)

Thaks very much!
=========================

Re: foodies question
terriblelyne
2005-10-18 01:14 am
Just be prepared to get hit on by girls, with it being a Foodies,
y'know.
===================

Re: foodies question
bramblekite
2005-10-18 04:15 am UTC
I'm sure I'll be horribly offended (kidding!! ;P)

===================

Re: foodies question
terriblelynne
2005-10-18 04:17 am UTC (link)
Well, I know you're not much for being hit on on general principle,
so, just letting you know it's meat-markety.

================

Re: foodies question
bramblekite
2005-10-18 04:25 am UTC
1) I'll be there right after Krav Maga, so I'll be wretched-looking
and

2) I'll be there with my pretty boy cousin, who got all the attention
at last Goddess Night there.

I'm sure I'll be fine :) I think I'm actually pretty clueless when it
comes to being hit on, only the most vulgar attempts actually get on
the radar. All the subtle stuff, I just kind of go "what a nice
person!" like a moron.

I was once told "you understand everything you see" ....which means I
don't see a lot of things. Which, really, is fine.

Now off to dreamland for this clueless puppy. :)
===========

Re: foodies question
terriblelynne
2005-10-19 12:03 am UTC
Yeah, but this is Foodies, meaning it's a lesbian event, and unless
someone thinks he's a girl, people kinda might be wondering why he's
there. And it also might go over quite badly if he approaches anyone.
Honest, I've never seen a guy at a Foodies, so you might want to
rethink that.

========================

REthinking
bramblekite
2005-10-19 11:52 am UTC
Hmm...go by myself after I've made a reservation for two, feel
uncomfortable & unhappy because everybody but me will be there with
at least 1 friend,

OR go with my cousin, a person whose company I always enjoy, someone
I always have fun with and possibly face the disapproving glares of
strangers whose best response would have been ignoring me [edit:
added but not posted in her LJ: or hitting on me disgustingly],
ANYWAY?

Gee, what to do, what to do?

comments

3610LYRICS - Two Kinds of Love, Stevie Nicks

2023-08-24T21:46:13Z

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G3UTExOEVxc

Oct. 3, 2005

Ooh and on you run
You search for love and you hate searching
You wait for love and you hate waiting
You say I hate this
Well it's just another test
Cause there are two kinds of love
To do the thing that we do the best
My masterpiece

Who in the world do you think that you are fooling
Well I've already done everything that you are doing
Well the two of us, well we must be
A great temptation to have even started
Well don't you know, as you walk on by
That great temptations never really die

Well I talked to my famous friend last night
My third day up well, his second nighter
He says I don't know how you do what you do how do you
let the world in
Well I say well there's no way out
Then I just play out the game
Well the two of us Widow and a Dove

Who in the world do you think that you are fooling
Well I've already done everything that you are doing
Well the two of us, well we must be
A great temptation to have even started
Well don't you know, as you walk on by
That great temptations never really die

Ooh the two of us
Estranged sometimes for their very survival
Outraged at each other engaged to each other in their hearts
But they live apart

Two kinds of love
One for the way you walk
One for the way you love me
You're a great temptation

Two kinds of love
One for the way you walk
One for the way you love me
Two kinds of love great temptation

comments

3830last night's dream

2023-08-21T21:51:54Z

15 Nov. 11:05 am

in Vegas w/Sweetie. Talking on phone w/Xtal. Riding elevators. Tripping on
drugs while wearing some kind of velvet outfit that was the same fabric
as my faire garb from this past weekend, but like, pants or something.?

No clue.

comments

3817Diaryland Survey - cashout by lisatote

2023-08-21T20:50:42Z

Nov. 15, 2005

cashout
created by lisatote
read other people's answers

description: Just for me to know a little bit about you. Since I bare
my soul for you, I think that's fair. Right?

Here are eekyfreeky's answers:

1. You're walking down a trendy little street, money in your pocket
(or purse, or billfold or whatever). First store you come to is a
music store, with a 3 for $20 sale. What 3 discs do you grab? (all)
probably soundtracks, or greatest hits. 80s music.
2. Music in hand, you keep walking. Next store sells kooky little t-
shirts. There's every little slogan imaginable. What slogan goes on
the tee that you buy? (all)
Something intellectual/feminist, like "Fuck your facist beauty
standards" or "reject the dominant paradigm"...something people will
squint at when I walk by.
3. That was fun, huh? Now you head into a store called "Kitchen
Essentials". What's the most essential tool (not appliance!) in your
kitchen? (all)
Sharp knives!
4. Moving on, we're at "Stuffed Jungle". You are astounded by the
variety of stuffed animals there. Which cuddly creature do you take
home with you, and what do you name it? Is there something special
about that kind of animal? (all)
Something wierd, like a stuffed iguana or squid. maybe a bat. Just
something people wouldn't normally think of as 'cuddly'.
5. Whew, you're wearing out your shoes, huh? There's a shoe world
right here! Lucky you! What kind of shoe do you prefer? Do you have a
favorite brand? Color? What's the most you'd pay for shoes? (all)
Not heels. Probably Docs or Chucks. In a goofy color. I am a
cheapskate when it comes to shoes. I don't think I've ever paid more
than $50 for a pair.
6. Time for a beverage, no? Sitting at a quaint little table at a
swanky bistro, what do you order to quench your thirst? (all)
Iced cappucino.
7. Since you're drinking, you might as well have a snack. What's your
poison? Are you all about the sweets, or are you the meat & potato
type? (all)
something on croissant-type pastry. Probably sweet.
8. Do you get an appetizer? What's the best kind? (all)
salty and deep fried.
9. How much do you tip? Would you tip more if I was your server?
(all)
I usually tip 20%for adequate-or-better service, 15% for crappy. It's
a shitty job and I wouldn't want it. I've been known to leave $5 tip
for a cup of coffee if I know the server.
10. Heading back out, the weather is perfect for you. What's it like
out there? (all)
Sunny, not at all humid, with a nice cool breeze.
11. Oooh, cool! A movie house, playing your favorite flick. Who's in
it, and what's it called? I like movies, can I come? (all)
? I dunno. I havent' liked any of the movies I've seen lately. But if
it's good and I like it, it probably has Ewan MacGregor and he's
probably at least half nekkid :)
12. You had better be heading home. Get to your car, dammit! What do
you drive? If you don't drive, why? Isn't that sort of weird? (all)
I drive a 2000 Subaru wagon. Mostly because I take crap to craft
shows, but it's all wheel drive and has some guts, too so it's not a
real wuss-mobile, even though it kind of looks like it.
13. Are your windows open or do you have the A/C cranking? (all)
AC all the way, baybee!
14. When you get home, are there plants there? I always kill plants.
I have managed to keep the cats alive, though. Yay me! (all)
The cats kill the indoor plants,but the outside ones look allright.
15. What's the first thing you do when you walk in the door? (all)
turn on a light, our entryway is dim. Then I throw all my junk in a
chair in the living room.
16. You go outside to get the mail. You're so excited, you've got
mail! What's the best kind of mail to get? (all)
Catalogs of funky wierd stuff.
17. Will you send me mail? What will you send me? (all)
Probably not. Postal rates just went up. Do you want an ecard
instead?
18. It's getting late, you should make your plans for the perfect
evening after this perfect day. What are you going to do? (all)
Take a hot bath and go to bed
19. When you crawl into bed at the end of the night, how do you
sleep? I sleep on my side and kick the covers everywhere. I have hot
feet! (all)
I start out on my back with lots of covers.
20. Was this really lame? (all)
Only slightly :)

comments

3808Diaryland Survey - imnosy by cosmicrayola

2023-08-17T21:33:58Z

15 Nov. 8:48 am

imnosy
created by cosmicrayola
read other people's answers

description: Just a few questions to get to know ya a bit better. If
any are too personal, skip them. Not a problem. This is mostly geared
for people in relationships for the first half. The second is based
on moral decisions.

Here are eekyfreeky's answers:

1. Are you married or in a long term relationship? How long? (all)
Long term - 6 years
2. Do you have kids? How many and what sex? (all)
No kids. ever.
3. Do you have grandchildren yet? How many and what sex? (all)
nope, see above.
4. What was you wedding song or what is your "couple" song? (all)
"December", it's a long story.
5. Does your SO have a particular habit that really bugs you? (all)
He saves every piece of paper he gets(bills, receipts, ATM printouts,
catalogs, etc) and stacks it up on top of all the other paper he's
collected over the years.
6. Where did you meet? (all)
...it's lame, but we met on a MUSH (online), and then the first time
we met in RL, we met in his driveway. DISCLAIMER: we did NOT have an
online romance. We were just friends!!!
7. What was the last gift he/she bought you? (all)
Probably something really sweet and girly, like more memory for my
computer.
8. What was the last gift you bought him/her? (all)
Something stupid from Toy Joy, I'm sure.
9. When was the last time you said I love you? (all)
last night
10. When was the last time he/she said I love you? (all)
last night
11. Where would you like to retire to when you're both old and gray?
(all)
I like where we are now.
12. Where did you go on your best vacation together? (all)
San Francisco to see our friend J-Law graduate.
13. Moral questions here. You are both on a ship that is sinking. You
only have one life vest. What do you do? (all)
Give it to him. I'm more buoyant, anyway.
14. You have a suspicion that your partner is cheating. You have no
proof. You a)confront him/her, b)ignore it and maybe it will go away,
c)ya kick the bum out or d) you go have an affair cause, hey! Why
not? (all)
I'm definitely an 'ignore it and maybe it will go away' kind a gal.
15. You have saved up $3000.00 together. You planned on buying all
new appliances and washer/dryer. SO planned on a new big screen TV.
Who is going to win this one? (all)
Me.
16. You are really tired and just want to shower and curl up with a
good book. SO is geared up for a party you were both invited to. What
do you do now? (all)
I will probably go to the party but sit in the corner, or find a
quiet place and sleep at the party.
17. Are you an organ donor? Why or why not? (all)
Yup. When I'm gone, I won't have any use for my organs, and I'm type
o- (universal donor) which makes me feel guilty for not donating
blood.
18. You find out that a family member (That you care about) needs a
kidney transplant. You are a match. You are in good health. Are you
going to offer? (all)
absolutely.
19. You find out that a family member (that you can't stand) needs a
kidney. You did't need it for the other member because he/she had a
miraculous recovery. Are you going to offer it? (all)
nope. But I will do it if she asks me.
20. Your 10 year old child has just come in crying. They were called
a recial slur by one of the neighbo kids. How do you deal with it?
(all)
"Kids are mean, and if you cry they will just know that they can make
you cry again, any time they feel like it. You're gonna need a thick
skin if you want to live in this world, kid. So buck up and learn a
few nasty words of your own."
21. A family member finds out she cannot carry a child. You are in
good health and 25. Would you carry it for her? If you are a guy,
would you let your wife carry it for her? (all)
I'd let my wife do it :) Seriously...I probably would, but they'd owe
me BIG TIME.
22. You have been trained in CPR. You are in a store and someone is
having a heart attack. Their heart stops. You have no mask to cover
their mouth. Do you still give CPR? (all)
of course.
23. Your next door neighbor, who is also a friend, confesses that he
has killed someone. Do you go to the police? (all)
Nope. I might encourage my friend to turn himself in, but I wouldn't
rat him out.
24. You find a bankbook with $1,000 cash in it. You look at the book
and see that the person still has $100,00 in the back. What do you
do? (all)
If there's an address or phone number, I will contact the person and
give it back. Stealing makes me feel very sick to my stomach.
25. You find out that your partner was actually born a different sex.
Children not being an issue, would it matter to you? (all)
Heavens no! Love is love, and it's damned hard to find a person you
can live with. I love a person for who they are, not what they've got
in their pants.
26. Your best friend is getting married. He/she wants you to be their
best man/maid of honor. You know the person they are marrying has a
very shaded past. What do you do? (all)
I will be there for my friend and do what he/she asks. If he/she is
marrying a bad person, he/she will need all the support he/she can
get.
27. Your best friend develops a severe drug problem. You have talked
and talked but it has done no good. Do you still stick by them or cut
them loose? (all)
cut 'em loose.
28. Your partner lands the job of a lifetime but it is far away in a
place you don't like. Do you go with them anyway or call it quits?
(all)
I'd go with him. I've lived in Greencastle, IN and it didn't kill me,
so I can probably live anywhere. As long as I have internet access,
that is. :)
29. Your best friend just went shopping and bought the most hideous
outfit you have ever seen but they think it looks great on them. Now
they ask if you like it. How honest do you get? (all)
probably say something about the color not being quite right with
their new summer tan/hair color, whatever.
30. You just took a survey that is really lame. Do you continue to
read that persons diary? (gee, I hope so!) (all)
*laugh* probably.

comments

3804Diaryland Survey - woolfabric by sporesgirl

2023-08-17T21:08:40Z

15 Nov. 8:19 am

woolfabric
created by sporesgirl
read other people's answers

description: I'm just bored, ya know?

Here are eekyfreeky's answers:

1. Where do you live? (all)
Austin, TX
2. Did you shower today? (all)
yes
3. Do you like hats? (all)
yes
4. Do you remember when the New Kids on the Block were at the height
of their popularity? (all)
yes...I worked in a bookstore and we carried every NKOTB book,
biography, sticker book, lyric book, etc etc, ad nauseam. It was
horrendous.
5. Who's your favorite nija turtle and why? (all)
Um...Donatello? Is he the purple-headband one? I dunno. Was never
into ninja turtles.
6. Did you remember to shut off the lights? (all)
yup
7. Why are you filling out this survey...no, for real? (all)
boredom. Avoiding work. Sorry!
8. Do I know you? If no, skip to question 10. (all)
nope
9. If you answered yes to question 8, who are you? (all)

10. What's your favorite movie and why? (all)
...I really like Fight Club right now. It is just a perfect summary
of my existence at times.
11. Is it raining right now? (all)
Not in my part of town.

eekyfreeky's comment on this survey: blee!

comments

3787Diaryland Survey - housebuying by Neko_Carre

2023-08-17T15:23:10Z

15 Nov. 7:38 am

housebuying
created by neko-carre
read other people's answers

description: I'm about to delve into the terrifying realm of first-
time Home Buying. I'm slowly becoming edu-ma-cated about the process,
but I'd like to get as much advice as possible from people who have
done it. So HELP PLEASE!

Here are eekyfreeky's answers:

1. What city do you live in? Oh, and how old were you when you bought
your first house? (all)
Austin TX, 30
2. What year is your home and what the style of your house? Also,
what size is it (bedrooms, bathrooms, etc)? (all)
1970, 1 story, 3 bedrooms, 2 baths
3. What year did you buy it? How much did you pay? What is your
interest rate? (all)
2000, 105K, 7.5%
4. What is your monthly mortgage (including taxes, insurance, etc)?
Was it within your price range? Was it what you expected to pay, or
was it a surprise? (all)
995. Our agent told us we could afford more, but we wanted to keep it
around a grand, so we could afford to do other stuff besides just
make a house payment.
5. What type of loan did you get? What financial institution did you
use? How much was your down payment? What about your closing costs?
(all)
30 year fixed. 10K, closing costs rolled into mortgage (Ithink)
6. How did you choose your agent? Did you use more than one at the
same time? Did you like or dislike him/her? Why? (all)
we went to a 'first time buyers' class and the guy teaching it became
our agent. We liked him. He drove us around and really explained
things to us as we went along.
7. How many houses did you look at? How long did it take for you to
find the right house? Did you get that "this is THE ONE" feeling?
(all)
We looked at a bunch...maybe 20 or 30, the market was really tight
and when we'd stop to think about it, the house we were thinking
about would get bid on and sold. We got tricked into bidding when the
seller's agent had already accepted a bid and knew we weren't going
to get it, and then we were just like 'bla' and the next house was
the one. We saw the front,went 'bla' then came in and saw how light
and spacious it was, and that was that.
8. Tell me about your offer. Was it high? Low? Did it have
stipulations? Was there a lot of back-&-forth? Any problems? (all)
We offered what they were asking; the market was VERY tight at that
time, very much a seller's market. No problems.
9. How was the whole home buying process in general? How long did it
take from deciding on a house til you were moving in? (all)
We started looking in april, closed in july,moved in August. Not too
bad.
10. Okay, so you're in your house. What happened next? How did you
feel? Did you love it? Find things wrong? Wish you'd waited? Feel
gidy with happiness? (all)
we were giddy. I have never doubted the choice. When part of our yard
fell into the creek, Sweetie started getting down about everything.
He wants to sell it and move, but now it's a buyer's market, of
course
11. How did it affect your marriage/relationship? Was it better or
worse? Did you still have sex? Did you fight about house stuff? (all)
So far it's been fine. He knows I like the house, I know he'd be
happier elsewhere, and we just go along with life.
12. How did it affect your social life? Did you stop doing things
with friends? Or did you see no difference? (all)
I don't think it made any difference. We had a great housewarming
party :)
13. How was your financial situation afterward? Did you go overboard
with home design? Did you have to stop buying personal things that
you'd purchased in the past (like clothes, haircuts, alcohol)? Did
you no longer take trips? (all)
There are a lot of things I want to do to the house, but since he's
not interested I don't really feel like being the one hand clapping,
ya know? So I've paid for a few repairs that needed doing, he's done
a few things that needed doing, but life has mostly continued as
usual for both of us as far as spending money on our own interests.
14. Did you have to do any construction, remodeling, or repairs on
your house right away? (all)
nope
15. Have you had to do any emergency repairs on your house? If so,
what? How did you afford them? (all)
the flashing on the roof around the chimney. I think I wrote a check.
16. Did you regret your decision to buy a house? Or was it the best
decision you ever made? (all)
I don't regret the house. Sometimes I regret the Sweetie. Most of the
time I think the house and the Sweetie were both good decisions.
17. Give me what you think is the single most important piece of
advice about buying your first house (more advice questions below -
this is the spot for the *most* important). (all)
don't let them talk you into spending more money than you want to
spend. Make sure you'll still have $ for going out, buying clothes,
paying bills, etc.
18. Can you recommend me a lender you've had luck with? Or which
lender should I totally steer clear of? (all)
we are with GMAC. They're OK. MBNA sucks. Bank of America sucks.
Never had a house thing with them, but in general.
19. I don't have a down payment. I know there are types of loans you
can get with zero down. Do you know anything about that? (Disregard
if you've already answered this in Question No. 5.) (all)
nope.
20. Give me advice on choosing a lender/loan. What "under-the-
surface" things should I watch out for? (all)
the balloon payment thing is a rip, and a variable interest rate can
be, too.
21. Give me advice on selecting a house. Obviously "pick one you
like," but what other stuff would a first-time home buyer not know
about? (all)
never buy one that's had foundation work. Look for new roof, AC and
heat, that's something you dont' want to bother paying for right
after you buy a house.
22. How did buying a house affect your life, in the big picture
sense? (all)
I am happy to have a place to belong.
23. Do you feel really tied down? Does the responsibility of owning a
house weigh on your mind and your pocketbook? (all)
Sometimes I feel tied down, but most of the time I feel like it's an
investment; eventually the market will get better, and we can sell or
whatever.
24. What am I missing? What should I be asking you? What are the
answers to the things I should be asking? (all)
I can't think of anything.
25. I've said this before but, I'm BROKE! Should I not be doing this?
(all)
it's really a buyer's market right now. Mortgage companies are
falling all over themselves to sell to people who have enough for a
monthly payment but nothing for a big down payment. I'd take
advantage of that.
26. If you think owning a home is the best thing ever, and you
totally think I'm doing the right thing, convince me of that. (all)
Renting is throwing your money down a rat hole. Might as well be
spending your money on something that has a return, you get a tax
write-off, and eventually you can sell it if you want to.
27. Tell me anything here. (all)
I can't think of anything.

comments

3785Diaryland Survey - pirates by pyrite

2023-08-17T15:02:15Z

Expand Messages

15 Nov. 7:39 am

pirates
created by pyrite

description: this is a survey about pirates for pirates. it may also
help you discover that pirate within yourself and free him/her so
that s/he may prance about the earth looking to plunder, pillage and
occasionally run amuck.

Here are eekyfreeky's answers:

1. are you a pirate? (all)
No, I'm just a groupie.
2. are you a fan of the bands flogging molly, deals gone bad, or the
slackers just because they have songs about pirates and refer to
their fan base as such? (all)
I like Flogging Molly. but mostly for their version of "Scotland the
Brave"
3. do you have a favorite pirate? if so what is his or her name?
(all)
Anne Bonney
4. do you have a good pirate movie to recommend? (all)
Pirates of the Caribbean, of course.
5. what about a good pirate book? (all)
Pyrates, by George McDonald Frasier--seriously, read this book NOW.
6. do you like being called a wench? what exactly is a wench? (all)
Depends on who is doing the calling. Wench is a woman who isn't
afraid to be sexy and funny and smart and stand up for herself.
7. do you have a pirate name? if so, what is it? (all)
Nope :( that makes me sad.
8. when ashore, the first thing you do is: a) find some food that
didn't come from the sea b) find a wench, of course c) consider
changing careers - the merchant marines? d) look into a new
replacement limb as current one has been hacked to bits (all)
Where is the "DRINK RUM" option??
9. what kind of laugh do you have? a) a low rumble b) a serious of
grunty, throaty noises c) a long, loud "HA!" followed by many
short "ha"s d) a silent, jiggly-gut laugh (all)
C. HA! hahaha!
10. do you prefer your parrot sit on your right or left shoulder?
(all)
ew. No. No parrots. They poop. And bite. and are very very LOUD. I
have sensitive ears.
11. what is the best kind of wood for the making of a pegleg? (all)
Maple, I think.
12. how often do you incorporate the words/phrases "swabbie"
and "poop deck" into your conversations? (all)
I say Poop. But without the 'deck'.
13. do you really NEED that eyepatch? hmm? hmm? one-eyed willie??
(all)
*laff* naw.
14. have you ever had SCURVY??? (all)
No! ew!
15. do you bathe regularly or do you enjoy wallowing in your own
filth? (all)
I likes me some baths. Preferably with cabin boys to scrub my back &
pour me glasses of wine while I soak.
16. do you pillage or plunder? (all)
I'm more of a pillager, really. Plundering is so vulgar.
17. captian hook: role model or bully with an obsession with small
boys? (all)
Captain Hook RAWKS!!!! (especially the one in HOOK)
18. how many inches in diameter is your handlebar moustache (or the
handlebar moustache of your husband/mentor/captor)? (all)
I've never measured it, but it's a good size.
19. have you ever travelled from the crow's nest of your ship to the
deck by riding a knife as it tears through the main sail? (all)
What a waste of a good sail!
20. have you ever bartered using teeth ripped from the mouths of
mediterranean captives? (all)
yeeps! No, I have a Mastercard.
21. have you ever walked into long john silver's waving a knife while
demanding you speak to "the bloody savage who stole me tre'jur, tha
cursed scoundrel!"? (all)
*laugh* No, but now I will.
22. just how hard do you laugh when people say, "you drink like
you've got a hollow leg!" it's funny BECAUSE IT'S TRUE! where else
would you hide your handy dandy weapons of torture? (all)
HA! Hahaha!
23. true or false? piracy is a crime not against any particular
state, but against all humanity. (all)
Oh, lighten up. False!
24. do you promise to uphold the pirate philosophy now and
forevermore? (all)
It's more...guidelines, really.

eekyfreeky's comment on this survey: Awesome survey. Thanks for the
smiles this morning! Yarrrr!

comments

3784Re: mercury retrograde or something

2023-08-17T14:40:13Z

15 Nov. 7:08 am

[Aunt L] called after I wrote this and asked to borrow some beading
tools. I will take them over today when I get [Cousin B] for the full moon
gathering (looks like it's not gonna be much of a gathering. Me and
[Cousin B], Elena's got a class, Maggiemaepisces rsvpd but I don't think she can get up
the hill, Eric B said he has a class and might show up later. feh.)

Anyway, she said she was sorry [Cousin B] had pooped out on me. I told her I
should have gone and I was mad at myself for being so dependent on
others to motivate myself and she was all like 'you can always go by
yourself another time' and I got (irrationally) angry and said "no,
no I can't. The reason I have Krav scheduled certain times is because
I'm busy the other nights" and then she backpedaled and said she
meant I could go twice on the nights I'm available (um, no).. it just
made me mad. She had no business apologizing on [Cousin B]'s behalf. She has
no business enabling him to be a worthless piece of crap like Uncle Bubba
and [brother A]. I HATE to see it. HATE it. But there's fuck-all I can do if
[Cousin B] has decided to be unreliable, lazy, and worthless, and nothing I
can do to keep [Aunt L] from encouraging/enabling/pandering to it.

God damn it. It just makes me sick and sad.

And I'm still fucking mad at myself for not going to class on my own.

comments

3781Chrisloy HBB hunting.

2023-08-16T22:50:21Z

14 Nov. 3:28 pm

I think I'm about to get unfriended. I don't really care, honestly.
She's a neurotic selfish drama freak. And, yes, I'm mercenary, in that
I don't really want to give her any of my time and energy or caring
because I don't see that she's capable of or interested in reciprocity
in her relationships.
=================================

Sparkling ([info]chrisloy) wrote,
@ 2005-11-13 20:42:00
Previous Entry Add to memories! Next Entry
Current mood: pessimistic

There is a trio in the apartment community where I live. They are new
(from my point of view) to being a trio but they will make it work. I
just know.

Sometimes I wonder if anyone other than my hubby could ever really
love me that deeply let alone understand that I can feel that deeply
toward others without taking away from what I feel toward an
individual. I really like the idea of polyamory, of the freedom to
love and be loved by as many people as your heart can hold. Of course
time dispersement is a big issue with this, but more than that
personality conflicts, mutual attraction (and more), and just the
plain logisitics of life play into it so much.

Over the years I have had MANY roommates from the insane (literally)
to the perfect roommate who manage to somehow never piss me off with
regards to living arrangements through the entire experience. Of about
25 roommates I have had, I get along well enough to continue living
with 4 of them if the situation were to arise again.

That really says something about my tolerance levels on all types of
issues.

So assuming I can find someone I could actually live with, hubby would
have to be able to live with them too and he is fairly self-conscious
about his body yet wants to be able to be naked in his own home (and I
don't blame him, I do too!). The field narrows even further.

Okay, now we have to add in someone who is good with kids and who we
can trust to help raise our child.

The person has to love both of us and we have to love them. In love
would be nice but just love would do.

Oh and finally they have to live in or around or be willing to
relocate to Austin with the possibility of heading out to Baytown if
things get too rough here.

All of this whilst trying to meet someone by staying in our house
since we are too tired dealing with the Boy and our lives to even be
able to present ourselves decenlty in public.

So if this mythical person exists, what the heck are the chances that
they are polyamorous enough to WANT to live with us and make a go of
it?!?!?

I have a feeling my ideal poly household (trio/quad/whatever) is just
a dream and I need to try to move on with reality.

(Post a new comment)

[info]ytima
2005-11-14 03:46 am UTC (link)
I have a feeling my ideal poly household (trio/quad/whatever) is just
a dream and I need to try to move on with reality.

i SO understand that feeling. seriously.

(Reply to this)

[info]bramblekite
2005-11-14 03:38 pm UTC (link) Delete
the neat thing I've noticed about poly is that there's no 'one true
way' to do it.

What about your list above is absolutely mandatory, and what is 'in a
perfect world, this would be" type stuff?

would the person(s) have to live with you 24/7? or could they just
live nearby? could you be happy in a long distance relationship?
Thinking not only about what you want, but WHY, might help you develop
a more work-able poly relationship model to try.

And then again I could just be talking out of my ass, because as a
hetero/mono childfree person, what could I possibly know about poly/bi
with children relationships, right? :P

(Reply to this)(Thread)

[info]chrisloy
2005-11-14 09:22 pm UTC (link)
One of the reasons I liek poly so much is the ideal of lightening part
of the "adult" work in the family. Kind of self-centered, but hey :-)

(Reply to this)(Parent) (Thread)
forgive me
[info]bramblekite
2005-11-14 09:41 pm UTC (link) Delete
but...were I a potential suitor, I'd probably be thinking something
like "Ok, so I live with these people and have sex with them and
accept their bodies as they are, and raise their kid with them, and
presumably contribute towards the household finances, and follow them
wherever they go...what's in it for me?"

I'm sorry, I'm just too mercenary, I suppose.

(Reply to this)(Parent) (Thread)
Re: forgive me
[info]chrisloy
2005-11-14 09:53 pm UTC (link)
It'd be family. It would be your kid too. It would be a love thing I
guess.

Ya know with everything else, it is easy to forget that love draws
people together more than any of the "I'd like it if the person were
attribute X".

It would be so easy for me to love so many, but with all the
complications, well, I guess I am just tired of being hur tand wary.
Probably another reason we will never have a poly household.

Again, all of this is my ideal. If I do end up letting myself fall in
love with someone, a lot of that probably won't matter. Well, they
will have to get along with the hubby and kiddo. That is the one
unbendable.

(Reply to this)(Parent) (Thread)
Re: forgive me
[info]bramblekite
2005-11-14 11:26 pm UTC (link) Delete
Comment Posted Successfully
See, I don't think I really get poly or am cut out to be poly...I see
what you want, but I don't really see what you're offering. I guess
you need someone who's more submissive and into kids than I can wrap
my mind around.

comments

3780icq w/A

2023-08-16T22:45:51Z

14 Nov. 1:54 pm

evile: hey! You're here! How was your weekend?
skye_dsDS: awesome, how was yours?
evile: really good :)
evile: Was this the weekend that you went and saw the friesian up
close?
skye_dsDS: yes
evile: cool.
skye_dsDS: I spent five hours yesterday in the middle of an entire herd.
skye_dsDS: pictures of which will be up as soon as sonar0m gets them to
me
evile: cool :)
evile: wasn't very impressed with my faire photos, but went ahead and
put them up anyway.
skye_dsDS: everybody have a good time?
evile: I felt like I looked REALLY cute...and I totally did not.
*sigh*
skye_dsDS: seems like the faire is running later this year than in years
past? (I know Scarbie's started running later)
evile: Yup, everyone had a nice time.
skye_dsDS: whether or not you looked really cute is a matter of opinion
and largely in the eye of the beholder anyway
skye_dsDS: so if in your eye you looked really cute, then you did.
evile: I think it started a weekend earlier and runs a weekend later,
maybe? usually runs into mid-november.
evile: I just need to accept the fact that my charm is maybe 30%
physical and the rest personaliyt, so I'm NEVER going to look as good
in photos as I think I should.
skye_dsDS: I'm in some of the photos they took this weekend
skye_dsDS: you can't even tell I've lost 20+ pounds
skye_dsDS: I hate pictures.
evile: that's depressing.
evile: the only thing photos are good for is to look back and
go "gosh, I was younger and thinner, why the fuck was I bitching
about the way I looked back then?"
skye_dsDS: nodnodnods
evile: Oh well. We had a nice day at faire. I was un-stressy, on the
logic that I had a whole 'nother day at faire on Sunday so I didn't
need to march people around to see and do everything in 1 day. And
then Sunday didn't happen....but oh well. It was still a nice trip.
skye_dsDS: the parade had a better turnout this year than last year, my
lesson never showed up, but I rode around the park anyway
skye_dsDS: someone was riding Roman in the parade (standing up)
skye_dsDS: so then in the park, with three birthday parties full of
screaming children, rather than in the safety of my training area at
home
skye_dsDS: sonar0m hops up on Jesse's back
evile: wow.
skye_dsDS: the short racing rein we ride her with of course isn't long
enough for that so I pulled out twenty feet of silklike rope and he
used that
evile: jeez. glad he didnt' die.
skye_dsDS: he still doesn't manage forward movement very well but he can
jump down off her a nd land flat on his feet
skye_dsDS: then out comes the bow, and a live arrow
skye_dsDS: I'm like, why are we carrying live arrows (rather than
boffer) in the truck?
skye_dsDS: we ate lunch in Mt Vernon with Mom and Gramma who cut my hair
and gave me lots o stuff
skye_dsDS: and then spent the rest of the day with magical magnificent
critters
evile: *nod*
skye_dsDS: the black truck is threatening to explode on me on the way to
work, so I'm not driving it anywhere else until sineater comes down here
and looks at it
evile: sounds like a plan.
skye_dsDS: the Faire folk have been impressed with the mounted archery
(at a gallop) so far, I t hink they'll be even more impressed with
mounted archery Roman style
skye_dsDS: although why it's called Roman I have no idea.
evile: *shrug* no tellin'
evile: I actually managed to meet up with everyone at faire that was
going thsi weekend...except rengeek, and he works there so I don't
know if that counts or not.
evile: I didn't get as many photos as I wanted. I wanted one of just
Jaime, Sweetie, and Max in their kilts, and I wanted one of all the girls.
skye_dsDS: I love pictures, as long as I'm not in them.
evile: Met Max's latest FB, she's actually really nice, cute, and
sweet. She was wearing a purple sort of harem girl/bellydance outfit.
evile: I didn't get any of her, either. She's in the background of
the Michael & Harmoni 'gangsta' pose
evile: Cam, Stephanie and Scott took a bunch, I hope they email them
to me.
skye_dsDS: purple :)
evile: Yeah, she was cute. She reminded me of you.
skye_dsDS: last time I told the boys "I am not cute!" I got "adorable,"
so I decided to stop before I was further behind.
evile: Rio hates 'cute' too. Sorry, I was trying to say something
nice about you. I won't do it anymore.
skye_dsDS: lol I don't hate cute
skye_dsDS: I only protest it with them because they say it so often
skye_dsDS: and thank you
evile: Yeah, I'm sure it's tedious to have handsome men telling you
how much they like you all the damn time. You poor poor woman. Why do
you put up with it? :P
skye_dsDS: actually, generally speaking, it depends on what personal
connotations of "cute" are
skye_dsDS: and I don't mean to sound like "it depends on what the
meaning of the word "is" is"
skye_dsDS: sometimes "cute" completely deprives one of all adult/sexual
qualities...like little sister, puppy dog, baby duck = "cute"
skye_dsDS: although I know that's not what they mean.
skye_dsDS: or you either
skye_dsDS: particularly talking about other women (in purple harem
outfits :)
skye_dsDS: it's tradition. they tell me I've done something cute, or
that I"m cute after having done something cute, and I must respond
like Sam t he Eagle, "I am not cute!"
skye_dsDS: "Kermit, does this show have any culturally redeeming value?"
skye_dsDS: (I love Sam, he's so funny, sorry)
evile: *nod*
skye_dsDS: anyway, cute girl for Max, in purple harem garb = good
thing :D
evile: I think so.
evile: She and her cutie blonde friend camped with us. They were fun.
evile: I think we had a better drum circle at our camp than at the
main revel fire. (at least in terms of keeping a beat & how much fun
I, personally, had at each)
skye_dsDS: love drumming, more than dancing actually, I can't believe it
took me as long as it did to figure that out.
evile: heh. I just like to listen.
skye_dsDS: you might like all the Hossam Ramzy stuff I bought
evile: comes up on my launchcast from time to time, good stuff :)
skye_dsDS: I was listening to Orloci's fan station
skye_dsDS: only heard one Dead Can Dance, but liked it
evile: I danced to Tartanic out front after faire closed. That was a
blast. We started with 4 people and people kept joining the circle
until there were probably 10-12.
skye_dsDS: heard a lot of other groups I hadn't heard before
skye_dsDS: all goth or ambient
skye_dsDS: I knew I liked ambient generally but now I have specific names
skye_dsDS: dancing = good for you - you are more physically graceful
than me.
evile: I was glad I didn't fall down or drop anything.
evile: I'm tempted to try and make it out to the final weekend of
faire...but it's Fredericksburg Trade Days this weekend...
evile: Introducing my various friends to my various other friends
mostly worked. Michael & co were not feeling too well, but other than
that, it was all good.
evile: So what did you decide about the horse, BTW?
skye_dsDS: it is a go.
evile: neat.
skye_dsDS: sineater is ok, with reservations
skye_dsDS: but then, he always has reservations, and nothing wrong with
that
evile: *nod*
skye_dsDS: thanks to his english teacher this semester (long story)
skye_dsDS: sonar0m has decided to get out of this semester as best he can
and get something full time in his field next semester.
evile: at least if things really don't work out the people you got
him from arent that far away
skye_dsDS: initially I would have not reacted to that positively, but
thinking about it, sineater never finished college
evile: yup
skye_dsDS: Travis (already a programmer) is in favor of it
skye_dsDS: and Christopher Alex(a friend from college) never finished
school either (although he has every cert known to man including
Cisco)
skye_dsDS: and makes six digits
skye_dsDS: so I'm thinking a shopping trip with sineater and Travis along
for advice, to get a nice suit or two as a Christmas present
skye_dsDS: and Travis and sineater to help me write his resume
evile: *nod*
skye_dsDS: since their techie world is different than ours, in terms of
dress and paper etiquette, or so they tell me
skye_dsDS: and I continue to look for something that will pay me more
than here
evile: cool.
skye_dsDS: the County Judge in Milam County called for an interview but
wanted me to know (as I had been asking before I even applied and no
one could/would tell me)
skye_dsDS: that the wage would be 8.65 an hour
skye_dsDS: and I said, I just can't do that
skye_dsDS: no way, no where no how
evile: *nod*
skye_dsDS: of the $12/hr I make now, only $2 goes to gas
skye_dsDS: even with the gas prices the way they are
evile: *nod*
skye_dsDS: plus truthfully it doesn't really make sense that they would
expect someone with experience back to 1989 would be at a place in
life where she could accept 8.65
skye_dsDS: "but it has insurance and retirement"
skye_dsDS: I have insurance through Dell
skye_dsDS: and retirement does me no good with the bills that are due now
skye_dsDS: but, it is good that I am generating interest
evile: yup
skye_dsDS: I should check the Dell DB again and give sineater my resumes
(one admin, one paralegal) and see what comes of that
skye_dsDS: it would be ideal if all three of us were working at Dell
evile: yeah :)
skye_dsDS: what exactly is in a Scotch egg?
evile: I posted my recipe in my LJ
skye_dsDS: I haven't read LJ in about four days now and man have I got a
lot to catch up on
evile: *nod*
skye_dsDS: I am so glad you had a good weekend :) Lovely weather for it
too (the rain didn't break until we were on our way home, had to
drive 35 mph for hours)
evile: It sprinkled a tiny bit Saturday afternoon, but not too bad at
all.
skye_dsDS: little sprinkles can be quite pleasant
evile: we went into the beer tasting right after that, so we escaped
the post-rain humidity.
skye_dsDS: those sound nummy (no mayonnaise - I can't stand deviled eggs)
evile: they turned out well. Great breakfast for camping.
skye_dsDS: I bet! I remember CMA being cold at the oddest times of
year, and having hot tomato soup with basil, garlic and/or ginger in
combinations, with frenchbread toasted with cheese
skye_dsDS: good outside cold morning breakfast
evile: yup
evile: oopsie, I think I just upset a polyperson.
evile: *giggles*
skye_dsDS: ?
evile: big ol' post of laundry list requirements for the hot bi babe
to complete their family--"must live with us, must accept my spouse's
body as it is, must help us rais our children, must contribute to the
finances, must be wiling to move when we do" and I basically
said "so...what's in it for the theoretical HBB?"
skye_dsDS: where is this? ROFL
evile: I just don't know why anyone would think they were such a
great catch that someone would just sign htemselves for a life of
selfless servitude
evile: it's a frends locked post, I don't know if you can read it. It
was just...sad. Some people are just such takers, they don't even
realize they're painting an exceptionally miserable, bleak picture
for their potenttial new partner.
skye_dsDS: actually, sounds like what Chris and James Loy have said
before
skye_dsDS: but not just them of course, it's a pretty big pattern from
what I've heard
evile: yup. It's practically an epidemic. HBB hunters looking for
cunt-slaves to raise their kids and clean their house and basically
have NO needs or lives of their own.
evile: Good fuckin' luck with that, and don't be surprised if you
find someone like that and come home to find the kiddies cooking in
the crock pot.
skye_dsDS: if I were an HBB, I would be the one with the slaves, thank
you very much
evile: that's pretty much what I'm thinkin'
evile: I have admitted I don't get the 'submissive' mindset, but is
there really a person out there who would be perfectly content to be
used for sex, house-cleaning and babysitting and otherwise sit around
idle with no life or interests or thoughts of their own?
evile: and if there was such a person, would they be interesting
and/or pretty enough for you to want them in that capacity? Seems
like you could have one or the other but not both.
skye_dsDS: zactly
skye_dsDS: the answer to the first is yes, abundantly
skye_dsDS: how attractive they are? ummm, well
evile: <===hetero/mono barren hag, what the hell would I know about
poly HBBs. :P
skye_dsDS: you could easily be a poly HBB if Sweetie allowed
evile: heh. probably.
Anyhoo, It's time for me to blow this pop stand. Hasta :)

comments

3767argh

2023-06-01T21:24:32Z

10 Nov. 8:05 am

I have a feeling Sunday isn't gonna happen.

And..argh, little miss "going back to Karate" so she doesn't come to
Thursday poly dinners anymore and working early hours M-F so she
doesn't stay out late anymore, asking ME if I'm snubbing folks?
GMAFB. Please.

===========================================

Onyxlynxx wrote,
@ 2005-11-09 15:06:00

Current mood: okay
Current music: Recoil by Ani Difranco

Monday night beli1738 and Adriana stopped by on their way home. It
was nice to get a chance to talk to Beli and Adriana really seemed to
enjoy seeing the pets.

After they left, I went over to maggiemaepisces and gev's. We just
lay around and talked until the other ladies started showing up. It
was wonderful to see kulilinei, jadeysmyname, Terriblelyneblelynne and
nikiyoy. It was fun meeting Niki's mom and little sister and being
able to put a picture to their stories. I played a little scrabble
until they decided that it wasn't fair for Maggiemaepisces and I to be a team. I
was getting tired by then anyway so I decided to go home.

Tuesday was work and karate. Work was unremarkable. Karate was fun.
We got paired up with another person of the same belt level then we
rotated through several activities. I think hitting Bob, the practice
dummy, continually for minute was the most fun. I also enjoyed with
Rebecca. At first she seemed kind of reserved but the more I get to
know her the more I like her. She just got her yellow belt and I
won't be getting promoted anytime soon so we will be spending lots of
time together.

Work sucked today. We are really busy and I keep getting all these
horrible calls. It has been something serious involving small
children like burns or abandonment or sexual abuse or both all day. I
am almost scared to answer the phone again.

Other than that, things are going pretty well. I had a nice visit
with mielikki during lunch. I have challenges in my life that I
continue to struggle with but for once I can say that I am mostly
happy with my progress.

---------------------------------------------------------------------

wow
bramblekite
2005-11-10 05:20 am UTC (link)
You saw me on Monday???

Could've sworn I was in Krav Maga class.

Wow...
-----------

Re: wow
onyxlynxx
2005-11-10 12:55 pm UTC (link)
Sorry. That was dumb. I am sure there is a good excuse? Wishful
thinking? Proof of how tired I was? Prescient vision of next Monday?
-------------

Re: wow
bramblekite
2005-11-10 01:07 pm UTC (link)
heehee. No worries, I just thought it was funny. (That or signs that
my request for a clone had been filled.)

Next Monday I'll be in Krav Maga again, and also the 21st. Then, the
28th, I'm taking a beading class with my aunt.

So I'm totally missing out on Girls nite for the entire month of
November! :(
------------

Re: wow
onyxlynxx
2005-11-10 01:44 pm UTC (link)
Hey. Did we do something to offend you?

I thought you were the one who still wanted weekly Ladies' Nights?

We are still on for TRF on Sunday, yes? How about meeting at the
front gate? What time is good for you? Are you going to wear garb?
Maggiemaepisces and I were considering going as civilians.
---------------------

Re: wow
bramblekite
2005-11-10 02:16 pm UTC (link)
Not offended, it's just the way things worked out this month. The
main (selfish) reason I voted for weekly girls nights is because due
to balancing Krav and Poly dinners, I knew I'd only be able to get
out to Girls Nite twice a month, at best, and if it turned into a
once-a-month thing, I'd be almost sure to miss it every time. If it
happens weekly, I have better chances of catching one. I'm paid thru
March for Krav classes, and I am going to try and get my aunt's
money's worth...but already getting a little resentful of the free
time it sucks up.

At the beginning of the month, it looked like the only free Monday I
had was the 14th, and then when the poly dinner days got changed
because of Thanksgiving, I had to re-organize my calendar so as to
get to Krav Maga 2x during the week....

I can be at the front gate any time Sunday a.m. I can wear garb or
regular clothes, whatever y'all want. As long as it wouldn't bother
you if I was garbed, I'd probably prefer to do garb. :)

comments

3250icq w/A

2022-06-11T18:13:24Z

May 31, 2005

evile: I know I said I wouldn't talk to you unless you talked to me
first...but FWIW, Nikiyoy's feelings were very hurt that you didn't know
who she was at the party, and that's probably why she acted prickly.
SkyeDS: I swear on whatever anyone wants to hold sacred, I don't
remember ever meeting her.
SkyeDS: and if it was at Poly, the only person I remember by name
from Poly is Michael
SkyeDS: and I'm not even s ure about that
evile: you have her friended in LJ, and comment on her posts quite
frequently, apparently.
SkyeDS: she friended me first
SkyeDS: and I would debate "frequently"
SkyeDS: and she doesn't ever reply to anything I say either, so I
quit posting quite some time back
evile: *shrug* I don't know about any of that, and I'm not fighting
with you on her behalf, or with her on yours...just trying to help
clarify.
SkyeDS: I'm sorry her feelings were hurt
evile: if you want to be mad at me for something I did or said,
that's your business, but I dont' want people being mad at me for
stuff other people did/said in my presence, simply because I was
there and they're my friend/family.
SkyeDS: I did, if you will remember as you were standing right there,
try to be very polite in introducing myself to someone I did not
think I'd ever seen face to face
evile: I was there.
SkyeDS: I cannot see why an honest mistake on my part required the
response it got.
SkyeDS: I'm not mad at anyone
evile: Ok.
SkyeDS: I would like people not to be mad at me, but if they are,
can't help that.
SkyeDS: and getting rapidly to the point where I dont' care anymore
because caring hurts.
evile: OK
SkyeDS: if you think it appropriate, I would be willing to go so far
as to apologize to NIkiyoy for hurting her feelings that I didn't
remember having met her
SkyeDS: it is a known failing of mine.
SkyeDS: typically I remember faces better than that but I am probably
going senile in my not so old age
evile: I think LJ tends to make people feel more/less intimate than
they actaully are in RL and leads to RL misunderstandings.
evile: Nikiyoy's real face is on her LJ icon, so she felt you should
have known her from that.
SkyeDS: would it help to email or post an apology?
SkyeDS: of course I knew her from that
SkyeDS: that's the reason I said, you must be NIkiyoy....
evile: *shrug* she's 22, stubborn, and prickly. Probably not worth
the effort on your part.
SkyeDS: and when someone doesn't say anything to me when I post in
their LJ, I quit saying anything to them
evile: *shrug* she doesnt' reply that often to anyone, that I've
seen...
SkyeDS: actually not counting today I haven't said much of anything
to anyone lately LJ or otherwise
evile: Like I said, LJ interactions tend to make people act/react in
RL in ways that may or may not be within the comfort level of both
parties. Feeling levels of intimacy that aren't there, or whathaveyou.
evile: I know onyxlynxx's had problems because people feel they know her
well enough from her LJ posts to hug her but she doesnt' feel she
knows them well enough to allow that intimacy
SkyeDS: if you think I should, I will. if you think it would make it
worse, I won't.
SkyeDS: I'm trying to behave less like a bull in a china closet
SkyeDS: and I am happy to take constructive criticism
evile: *shrug* Nikiyoy and I are a lot alike, which means that we share
some of the qualities that make me hard to get along with...for
example, making up our minds about people and not being swayed from
that opinion.
evile: She's 22 and while she's done a lot with her life and is a
lot more together than I did at that age, she's still emotionally
very young.
SkyeDS: she's going through a lot of shit I notice
evile: yup.
SkyeDS: so even notwithstanding everything you just said now would
not be a good time regardless
evile: If I were you, I'd probably just leave it alone, and if you
are ever in the same place at the same time, make sure to notice her,
be happy to see her, ask her some question that shows an interest in
her life, etc. and see if she responds nicely. If not, you did your
best.
SkyeDS: thank you, I'll do that.
evile: She's a good person....as are all the people I care about,
each in their own ways. It's tough when people you like don't get
along, but as I've said to others, I now just need to say to
myself: 'tough!"
SkyeDS: normally I apologize for hurt feelings when I am made aware
of them, by way of doing right and what I'd like to have done to me,
but I am happy to know that that is not the right thing to do here so
as not to make matters worse.
evile: *nod* If she felt like dealing with it right now, I'm thinking
she would have approached you. Sometimes it's best to just follow the
other person's lead.
SkyeDS: if the subject ever comes up I'm sure you'll relay my
sentiments
evile: If I can, without appearing to be fighting with one on behalf
of the other, yes. Otherwise, you two will have to work it out on
your own, if you think the friendship is worth the effort. If not,
then not.
SkyeDS: I made the assumption a long while back that she wasn't
interested in me when she asked me a question, I responded, asked her
question, and she didn't answer, or reply to any of my posts
afterwards *shrugs*
evile: *nod* and we all know about assumptions : P
SkyeDS: well, if my posts don't get responded to, I don't want to
keep cluttering up someone 's screen with what seems unwanted
evile: *nod* I can relate.
SkyeDS: if the chance presents itself to repair, I will take it. I'm
not going to seek it out, though.
evile: sounds like a plan.
SkyeDS: I could be equally hurt, offended, and prickly with just as
much reason, I choose not to be
SkyeDS: she's chosen her path, it's her path to choose.
evile: *nod* I think it was pretty much a case of wrong place/wrong
time/wrong frame of mind...nothing deal-breaking, just not rubbing
one another the right way. It happens. Even with close friends,
sometimes.
SkyeDS: well, I handled the situation when it happened as best as I
could given what I had to work with, and that's that. water under
the bridge, and I'm not going to think anymore about it.
SkyeDS: to my way of thinking being compassionate to the hearts and
minds of those arounds me means apologizing when I fuck up even
inadvertently and unknowingly
SkyeDS: but that's not compassionate if it just offends further.
evile: *nod*
SkyeDS: I meant well. And I think the people I give a damn about
know that I mean well. Anyone who doesn't, too bad.
evile: water under the bridge. Next time you're in the same
place/time, just try to start with a blank slate. "Hi, great to see
you, how is your new apartment/new boyfriend/whatever?"
SkyeDS: I'm glad to see that you gave Chance another chance because
on screen she looks wonderful (I read her lj too)
SkyeDS: for the record I think I get misjudged in the same way for
the same reason, but whatever.
evile: I am glad I've gotten to know Chance better. I'm glad I've
gotten to know you better, too.
SkyeDS: I don't really know how all this came to be at this pass.
SkyeDS: I wish it hand't.
SkyeDS: I tried to stop this from getting here, I tried to stop my
last conversation with Jinx from going where it did.
evile: I'm sorry you're still having trouble with Sharjinka.
SkyeDS: I'm not. I haven't spoken with her since.
SkyeDS: she never speaks to me first online when we're both at work,
maybe there's a reason for that and I should take a hint
evile: *shrug* some people don't. You rarely initiate contact, even
when I know we're on fine terms...
SkyeDS: but regardless, it is a lesson to me if in nothing else, that
when I"m at work, unless i need information from someone, I don't
initiate conversations at work anymore. with anyone.
evile: Oh, Ok then. Would you rather I didn't bother you during the
work day, then?
SkyeDS: and the next time something goes sour, I'm going to have to
engage the "hit and run" tactics that I don't like very much
SkyeDS: I don't like it when Jinx does it to me
SkyeDS: I remember you saying you don't like it when people do it to
you
SkyeDS: or you think that they are
SkyeDS: but I can't get work done when I'm sobbing
SkyeDS: you aren't bothering me. I'm just reserving my right in
general from now on to leave before I get so impaired that I can't
function while I have to.
evile: Ok.
SkyeDS: when I tell you, I can't talk about this anymore, you have
yet to not respect that.
SkyeDS: I don't perceive that being an issue between us.
evile: You could always do something like they do in BDSM scenes--if
I'm treading on unpleasant territory, you could say "yellow" or
something. Or "let's change the subject"
SkyeDS: I am still hurt by all the effort I spent trying to disengage
and change subject to be rewarded with being run over roughshod and
then hit and run disengage, but I'm trying not to dwell on it.
SkyeDS: and, I'm trying to get sineater off his high horse about his
little low black horse
evile: nope. Try not to take it personally. I think Sharjinka likes
you as a person and a friend, but just has fears for her friends at
HFS who may have more enthusiasm than aptitude for mounted combat.
SkyeDS: he seems to think he should have some say in who rides Jesse
so he's taking what got said personally even though I don't think it
should ahve been, it wasn't intended that way
evile: I think you both need to have say in who rides your
animals...he has a good idea of her moods and whether or not she's
going to be safe for someone, I would think.
SkyeDS: that was sarcasm
SkyeDS: of course he has say in who rides her
evile: Oh, I guess I'm missing something then.
SkyeDS: let me try again.
SkyeDS: no one rides Jesse without sineater's say so, she's his horse.
SkyeDS: so to be completely left out of Sharjinka's opinion about the
faulty decision making that's been g oing on with regard to who has
been riding her
SkyeDS: he takes personally
evile: Oh...OK.
SkyeDS: and that she didn't mean it that way and wasn't even thinking
about him is exactly why he's pissed off.
evile: *nod*
SkyeDS: she is, after all, his horse.
evile: yup
SkyeDS: anyway, I told him, I don't want a war, I want it to just go
away.
SkyeDS: he's trying to make up for wars that he should have waged and
didn't, and I appreciate that, but the road to hell is paved with
good intentions and I don't care for that road right now.
SkyeDS: I'm not going to ask her to participate again, matter of
fact, I'm not going to ask her if she wants to ride again at all in
any capacity.
evile: yup
SkyeDS: it's very hard to be aware of hearts and minds around you
when doing so gets responses that puts me in a fuck that and fuck you
(in general not you personally) mode
evile: well, you can't punish everyone around you for one
misunderstanding with one person...you have to be a better person and
keep trying.
SkyeDS: it hasn't been just one misunderstanding with one person
lately, it's been a whole friggin lot of them
SkyeDS: and every last one happened despite my best efforts to
prevent/cure them, so right now, I'm thinkin, if there's nothing I
can do to change anything, fuck it
SkyeDS: strength to change what I can, fuck what I can't, and the
wisdom to know the difference. my serenity prayer.
evile: OK
SkyeDS: if it were my shit to own, then my efforts to do so would
bear fruit. my efforts have born nothing but rot, so maybe it isn't
my shit to own, in which case, fuck it.
evile: Distance and time have a way of putting things in perspective.
I hope things work out for you.
SkyeDS: anyone who is feeling punished hurt or anything else is going
to have to speak up, and not in the way Nikiyoy's gone about it.
SkyeDS: otherwise, I'm not going to know, and if I don't know, I
can't fix it, and well, that puts me right back at square one.
evile: I hear ya. I think the main misunderstandign was over the
word 'met'...you did not recall meeting her in RL, and she recalled
your presence in her LJ many times, which she counted as 'meeting'.
SkyeDS: could have been cleared up with communication
evile: Indeed.
SkyeDS: and I've learned the hard way that nothing I do can persuade
someone to communicate who doesn't want to, and it takes two.
evile: yup
SkyeDS: if I were going to interpret LJ as "meeting" then I wouldn't
have spoken to her at all because her response to me in LJ has been
nada.
SkyeDS: anyway, I"m not going to take that as a mistake on my part
either, because I said the same thing to kulilinei and ladydreamtime, who are both
in the same circumstance with Nikiyoy in terms of LJ and RL "meeting"
and they weren't offended or haven't made it known to me if they were
evile: *shrug* you don't post comments in my Lj hardly at all, I
dont' take it personally or think about it much, except just now in
relation to what you're saying about posting in Nikiyoy's.
SkyeDS: I almost always see you here before I read LJ
evile: *nod*
SkyeDS: which is why I ask you stupid questions about your weekend
when I probably s hould just go read first
evile: *shrug* I don't mind.
SkyeDS: did a lot of posting to LJ today because there are so many
people I don't see here anymore during the day
evile: *nod*
SkyeDS: anyway, I don't post to your LJ because I see you here, so I
talk to you here.
SkyeDS: two way communication instantly is much more gratifying than
through LJ
evile: *nod*
SkyeDS: however, now that I think about it, Sharjinka has never
reacted in an unwanted way when I speak to her through LJ, so maybe I
need to suss out who to communicate with in what fashion.
SkyeDS: I am supposed to be a communicator, so it's very hard on me
not to take failures to communicate personally, as my fault
evile: *nod*
SkyeDS: I did a great deal of LJ posting to a great many journals
once upon a time and got no response from anybody so I stopped
evile: *nod*
SkyeDS: I don't want hard feelings between us
evile: me neither.
SkyeDS: :)
evile: Did you read Ample's post about the bbw calendar?
SkyeDS: I did, very cool
evile: I'm ambivalent. If I can use lots of make up and/or a
pseudonym, I might be up for it.
SkyeDS: I bet she's one of those people who will make you look
spectacular despite yourself
SkyeDS: Janet was like that
evile: I look spectacular when I try.
SkyeDS: I bet she could do it even if you were deliberately trying
not to is what I meant
SkyeDS: why you would do that I don't know
evile: I would not mind her doing photos, but I am not sure about
distribution thereof
SkyeDS: good question
evile: I've seen the photos she did of pace, and they're gorgeous.
evile: If she can make Pace look good, she can make me look like an
incarnation of the Goddess.
SkyeDS: I had that sense about her
SkyeDS: and as long as distribution doesn't include any useful
information
evile: yeah. first name or 'stage name' only, no
city/state/lj/whatever
SkyeDS: I'm already pretty present on the web. Anyone wanting my
contact info can get it on the ranch page
evile: *nod*
evile: But if you just went by 'skye' or whatever, ther's about 2
million skyes online.
SkyeDS: exactly
evile: I'm still thinking about it...I think I'll need to talk with
her and find out more.
SkyeDS: good idea
SkyeDS: I am flattered anyone would want me for such a thing
regardless
evile: just saw your comment...really, honey, you are tiny compared
to some of the BBW gals Ample runs with.
SkyeDS: that would be a comforting way to look at it but the cold
hard fact remains that I've gained 130 pounds in 10 years, and I've
got to do something aobut it
evile: for health if nothing else, yup.
SkyeDS: 13 years, bad math
evile: physical attractiveness, I'm finding, is more about attitude
and how you treat yourself, rather than any external measurement.
Weight is about health (and maybe clothes shopping :P)
SkyeDS: I know that to be true. But it doesn't work when looking in
the mirror.
SkyeDS: or just looking down for that matter.
evile: *nod*
SkyeDS: sineater and I are going to the Melting Pot tonight, finally
evile: oh, nice. You'll like it, I think.
SkyeDS: I remember you saying next time you were sticking to
appetizer and dessert, but I am still tempted by the sound of the
meats
SkyeDS: and right now I"m craving meat chocolate and red wine so
fiercely it isn't funny
evile: not enough for the $, and they don't do the oils, they do
flavored bouiillon...4 oz of boiled meat for $20, no thanks.
SkyeDS: is eating the cheese course and then the fruit course filling?
evile: hell yeah.
SkyeDS: which cheese course did you like? the one with the Wisc
cheese?
evile: Nikiyoy got that one, it was good.
SkyeDS: I think I'd like any cheese right now, I"m not picky
evile: I believe I got the one that was swiss and gorgonzola. Very
strong flavored.
SkyeDS: I like gorgonzola, specially with tomatoes. makes good soup.
evile: if you like blue cheese, you'll like that fondue.
evile: the wisconsin one uses beer, and you can defiitely taste the
beer. Which is fine if you're a beer drinker, not so good if you're
not.
SkyeDS: I'm deprived, I don't think I've had blue cheese
evile: gorgonzola is a blue cheese.
SkyeDS: in which case I like it fine :)
SkyeDS: have never had the blue marbled stuff that people make
dressing out of I don't think
evile: there's a whole family of blues...I like some better than
others, but they 're all good. the spanish blue I had last Monday is
my new fave, I think.
SkyeDS: that spanish cheese you had at full moon was so filling t hat
with a few squares I wasn't hungry again until I got home
SkyeDS: I ate that, one cupcake, and one piece of shrimp
evile: *nod*
SkyeDS: I had Greek for hte first time at Loch's event, I loved it
evile: *nod*
SkyeDS: I thought about grovelling at the cook's feet but a big group
was already doing that so I didn't
evile: Personally, I'd rather have help with dishes than grovelling.
SkyeDS: two of us do that anyway (one of us doing bird duty)
evile: *nod*
SkyeDS: Arthur would love to "supervise" but he isn't very helpful
SkyeDS: he's very helpful cutting up fruits and veges that you
intended to give to him anyway
evile: *nod*
SkyeDS: I am still singularly uninspired about my birthday, and it
looks like it's going to storm again anyway
evile: Yeah...some folks wanted to go tubing this weekend and it's
looking like that's not going to happen.
evile: Voyagers party is this Saturday, and a party at Jason &
Belinda's.
SkyeDS: User 129952931/SkyeDS has requested your authorization to add
you to his/her contact list
SkyeDS: User 129952931/SkyeDS added you to his/her Contact List
SkyeDS: I wanted to go to Somerville because I can ride there and
play in the water too
evile: *nod*
evile: I am not sure what the limitations are on the Trooper I'm
driving these days. Sweetie fixed the radiator leak, but there may be
other problems.
evile: it made it to the Guadalupe River just fine yesterday--
somewhere between San Marcos and New Braunfels.
SkyeDS: I wasn't expecting anyone to join me anyway, at this point I
just want someplace to go, myself :|
evile: Oh, OK.
SkyeDS: if we go you're welcome of course
evile: well, it's 4, so I'm gonna run.
SkyeDS: but I hate to ask anyone to do anything with a thunderstorm
looming above
evile: *hugs* have a good evening.

comments

3249icq w/Sharjinka

2022-06-11T18:02:33Z

May 31, 2005

evile: I missed you at the park Sunday :(.
Sharjinka: I'm sorry. I was busy moving a dryer from my sister's.....
Sharjinka: I didn't realize how tiring that would be.
evile: everyone thought you were probably playing WoW
Sharjinka: I did....later in the evening...

evile: Skye_ds's on. I told her I wasn't going to initiate
contact...we'll see if she does. Or if I'm getting the silent
treatment. what.ever.

Sharjinka: But I was moving the dryer and replacing the cord. I
didn't realize how long it'd take.
evile: *nod* that's heavy stuff.
Sharjinka: Haven't heard from her. ;-) It doesn't exactly depress
me.
evile: nope.
evile: She left right after I got to the park on Sunday; boo hoo.
Sharjinka: :-D
Sharjinka: What time did you get there?
evile: Oh...maybe 3 or so? I don't really remember. They went to eat.
evile: maybe more like 4.
Sharjinka: Should've come earlier.... ;-) I'm sure the boys would
love that.

evile: we'll see if it's a repeatable experiment.
Sharjinka: I wonder if she'll leave if I show up.....
Sharjinka: My popularity might go up. ;-) j/k (I'm horrible)
evile: It would be worth checking out. Kim was there and Skye_ds
hadn't left...so apparently she only leaves for some 'bad guys'
Sharjinka: I didn't realize that she and Kim weren't on good terms.
evile: Kim Sylvana kim.
Sharjinka: Yeah....little Kim?

evile: Yeah. She didn't like Little Kim telling her how to manage her
men and horses.
evile: Little Kim is a troublemaker who tried to get me to help
her...I told her that if I saw signs of abuse to the animals, I would
call the proper authorities, and that was that.
Sharjinka: She is very controlling.... I noticed her ordering Dani
around a bit.... I think she believes that Dani needs a mother
type.
evile: Kim is controlling or Skye_ds is controlling? I think they
share many of the same personality defects, which is why they don't
get along.
Sharjinka: Yeah....I've noticed that.... Kim is controlling but
Skye_ds is too.
evile: I don't know which one Dani is
Sharjinka: Ruling Lady.
evile: nope, still dont' know who she is.
evile: what does she look like? do? wear?
Sharjinka: She's a blonde girl. Very bubbly and sweet. Wears a
bodice and has a pirate look about her.
evile: does she date a tall skinny boy with bad teeth and a puppy?
Sharjinka: I'm not sure.
Sharjinka: She was dating Shamus.
evile: Does she live someplace wierd? Connolly or Connor or some
place liek that?
Sharjinka: I think so, yes. :-) Up north - near Waco.
evile: Ok. She was a snot to me on Sunday.
Sharjinka: I'm sorry. She's usually not like that. Maybe the RL
thing is going to her head.
evile: *shrug* I don't know her, I wasn't introduced, so I don't
really care.
Sharjinka: Okay. I should introduce you. Maybe she was just having
an off day.
evile: No telling. Skye_ds was talking to her before they all left for
lunch/dinner. So maybe that put her in a bad mood. Or maybe A told
her some bad stuff about me. wahtever.
Sharjinka: Might have been. Sounds like something she'd do.
evile: *shrug* I don't really care. If it makes A. feel better, she
can say wahtever she likes.
evile: Small Kim was full of nasty stuff on Sunday....mostly I think
because she was frustrated that her IDs were stolen, but then instead
of just dealing with that, she was talking smack about every other
woman out on the field. It was just...icky.
evile: I still don't have an effective way of dealing with people who
want to share all kinds of rude gossip and nasty TMI....without being
unspeakably rude myself, that is.
Sharjinka: I know what you mean. I just listen to it most of the
time.
evile: nod and smile. I just end up feeling so icky afterwards,
though....I don't want to be one of those kinds of people, I don't
want to be perceived as being like that simply because I allow them
to unload poison at me.
Sharjinka: I know what you mean but I never know what to do.
evile: me either.
Sharjinka: I do the smile and nod thing too.
evile: She gave me her AIM info and email and I'm just going to lose
it...I don't need that negtive garbage in my life, and I have a
shitty enough time trying to get along with sineater and Skye_ds without
being seen as cozying up to one of 'their enemies'
Sharjinka: I can understand that. Didn't know she was the enemy
though. ;-)
evile: Once you do or say something bad to/about her once, you're the
enemy forever.
evile: She may make nice to you if there's something she needs from
you, but that's about it.
Sharjinka: Okay.... I'll keep that in mind.
evile: And even if you do somehow manage to talk it through and get
back on speaking terms, teh next time something comes up, she'll
throw it back in your face again and again and never forget that you
done her wrong, once, a million years ago.
Sharjinka: I believe it. I'm expecting it.
evile: *nod*
Sharjinka: *sigh*
evile: If at all possible, it would be good to unite the knights of
Drandmir to ALL say "NO, equestrian combat was not voted in by an
Althing, HFS does not allow or sanction them, if you want to do them,
it's your business, but it's not an HFS activity"
evile: and that way she won't just be mad at mean ol Jinx. It can
be 'all of them' against her, the way she thinks it is anyway.
Sharjinka: Okay. Well....I know that Nezz, Thax, Mark, Steve, and I
are against it. I'm pretty sure Jose is against it but I'm not sure.
Sharjinka: At least, not absolutely sure. I can talk to him at A-Kon
about it.
evile: *nod* She gets away with a lot of shit because people don't
feel it's worth the hassle...but at some point, especially when
people are in danger and the HFS is threatened...people need to step
up and say "No" to her.
Sharjinka: I'm getting ready to. She can still do it; it's just not
affiliated with HFS.
evile: *nod* exactly.
Sharjinka: Any way I say it to her....she's not going to like it.
evile: which is why it needs to not come from you or 'you as
Sharjinka', it needs to come from you, you as representative of the
Knights of DRandmir, as a Reeve, in an official capacity.
evile: And, honestly, if you can sic someone on her who doesn't like
her already and she knows it...all the better for you.
Sharjinka: I don't know if anyone wants to deal with her. The
Drandmir mentality is to ignore what you don't like and hope it goes
away on its own.
evile: she is just not that good at picking up hints. someone is
going to have to step up and say "you are endangering our populous,
you didn't clear this battle game and rules in an althing, we can't
keep you from being at the park, but we can tell you this isn't an
HFS game you're playing"
evile: and if someone falls, gets hurt or killed, it's going to be on
HER not HFS.
Sharjinka: I agree.
Sharjinka: Usually all the unpopular jobs fall to me. I'm really
beginning to dislike it.
Sharjinka: *sigh*
evile: well, make someone else step up. Maybe even someone she still
likes/respects (prophet?)...this isn't a personal attack against her,
even though that's how she's going to read it. It's a matter of
safety, and HFS procedures for starting new games/new rules
Sharjinka: Yeah....I know. *sigh*
evile: A bunch of the gals, maybe a couple of the guys, are going
tubing on Sunday the 5th in San Marcos if you're interested.
Sharjinka: I just don't know if I want her angry at every belt out
there.
Sharjinka: Oh, darn it! I'm going to A-Kon. :-D
Sharjinka: Sorry.
evile: the sooner she gets pissed off at enough people, the sooner
she'll leave.
Sharjinka: There's a goal. ;-)
evile: this isn't about personalities, or who likes who, or being
mad...this is a legitimate concern for the health and safety of the
people who play at HFS.
evile: she keeps trying ot make it personal, and you keep letting her
take it to that level. It's NOT.
Sharjinka: I wish all her "expertise" made me feel better about it.
evile: even if she was as good as she says she is, she hasn't been
trained by SCA in their reeve-stuff, and she is only 1 person,
whereas SCA has several people on th ground, all well-trained, for
every mounted person.
Sharjinka: That's the part that makes me nervous. This is very new
territory and we don't have many people trained for it.
evile: she gets too busy flapping her yap and doesn't watch her
animals, so even if she was an expert, her attention isn't what it
shoudl be to be safe.
Sharjinka: I agree. *sigh*
evile: it's not personal, you aren't attacking her expertise or her
personality, you are pointing out that it's not safe and wasn't
vetted properly through channels to be an HFS game.
Sharjinka: *sigh* She doesn't see it that way.
evile: and if you keep it on that level, regardless of her temper
tantrums and wanting to make it personal, eventually it may get
through her head. Or she may leave. win win either way, IMHO.
Sharjinka: True. :-D
evile: What it boils down to, personality wise, is that in SCA she's
a small fish i a big pond; there are lots of people with horses and a
lot of them are better trainers & riders than she is. HFS she feels
like the biggest fish because she's the only fish, ya know? Make it
clear that she's not a fish at all, and she may go swimming elsewhere.
Sharjinka: Good metaphor and I figured that was the case.
Sharjinka: :-)
evile: just make it clear that it's not personal,and it's not just as
yourself that you are speaking (better yet, get Nezz or someone else
to talk to her, or several of you speak to her together)...and maybe
this will get resolved before anyone gets hurt.
Sharjinka: That's a good idea. I just need to make it out to the
park!
evile: *nod*
Sharjinka: I don't think I'll be there next Sunday because of A-Kon.
evile: yeah. I know a lot of people going to that.
Sharjinka: :-D I'm so weird. Steve and Xavier are going too.
evile: that's gonna be awesome :)
Sharjinka: Yep, yep! I can't wait. A-Kon is so neat. I'm going to
get my hair done, pack up costumes, etc. I feel like a drag
queen....sort of. ;-)
Sharjinka: I get so girly about this!
evile: heehee. Awesome!
Sharjinka: :-D
evile: I"m back. I had to get to the credit union before they closed
at 2.
Sharjinka: No problem.
evile: With the exception of Skye_ds, Nikiyoy really liked HFS on Sunday;
we may go out again so she can actually play.
Sharjinka: Awesome! I'd love her to join. I think she'd have fun.
evile: I think so too :)
Sharjinka: :-D
evile: I think she'd kick a lot of ass, too.
Sharjinka: I do too. Kind of scary: the idea of her swinging a
sword. Lot of potential power.
evile: *nod*
Sharjinka: :-)
evile: she played with the football girls for a while
Sharjinka: Wow.
evile: I don't think she ever played in any actual league games, just
the scrimmages on Sundays. She's also fenced.
Sharjinka: Cool.
evile: I don't know how good a fencer she is. But one of Pace's
friends does the boffer sword thing and Nikiyoy has played with them. No
actual 'rules' like HFS has, but just general beating up type
stufff :P
Sharjinka: She should be very good then. :-)
evile: Pace's friend is better. But yeah.
Sharjinka: :-D
evile: Pace's friend is some sort of transgendered person...and I'm
not sure how the HFS kids would react, so I haven't suggested HFS to
Pace's freind.
Sharjinka: Wow.
evile: yeah.
Sharjinka: We had a complete loon come out a few years ago and really
scared the kids.
evile: Pace's friend is nice, but ...
Sharjinka: Oh.....
evile: yeah.
Sharjinka: I'm worried. This is my first work day away from Pip.
evile: I guess you'll see how that went when you get home.
Sharjinka: True. I hope my home is still okay when I get there.
evile: it'll be important for you to learn this now, rather than
after you've made a 100% commitment.
Sharjinka: True, but I feel committed already. ;-)
evile: yeah, I know you're emotionally involved...but you also have
to be sure he can handle the life he'd have with you, on a normal day
to day non holiday weekend basis.
Sharjinka: True.
evile: I wish I could come to your craft night tomorrow.
Sharjinka: Yeah....I had forgotten about it and Jose asked me if I
planned to have one. I told him yes. ;-) I hope folks don't mind
the dog. He is fairly big.
evile: well...1) it's your house, if people dn't like the dog, they
can go elsewhere. and 2) if this dog is going to be a permanent part
of your life, everyone is going to have to get used to it.
Sharjinka: Very true. He does have a sweet disposition and I think
the trial period will be over at the end of next weekend.
evile: *nod*
Sharjinka: Poor thing. I put a muzzle on him during the day.
evile: My friend peglegasus puts his Weimaraner in a cage during the day
when he's not home.
Sharjinka: I didn't have the heart to do that. I was giving a pee
pee training rag for him. He's housebroken but he's not used to my
hours yet. His foster home had a 2pm to 10pm work schedule.
Sharjinka: given a training rag.
evile: *nod*
Sharjinka: He hasn't had any accidents at my home but he looks so
pathetic with his rag and muzzle on....
evile: I guess that's why this is a trial period for you as well as
him...to see if you can handle being a dog owner.
Sharjinka: True. It has been over 14 years old since I've dealt with
a dog.
evile: animals need discipline and firm limits on behavior. otherwise
they get neurotic and misbehave. It's crueler IMHO not to have
discipline, or only intermittent discipline.
Sharjinka: Yes. I know. I'm trying to be firm from the start.
evile: *nod*
Sharjinka: I also need to discipline him at the door. He wants to
leave with me and tries to push past me. I'm not sure what to do.
I'm consulting the greyhound manual tonight. ;-)
evile: yeah...that could be a problem.
Sharjinka: It has been. He's a strong animal.
evile: yup. I think once he has it firmly in mind that youre Alpha,
you wil lhave a much easier time getting him to stay.
Sharjinka: Yeah. I think he already knows that I'm a leader in some
way.
Sharjinka: :-)
evile: but still testing to see what he can get away with :)
Sharjinka: Yes, he is testing me. My Dad used to be a bit harsh on
the discipline with the family dog.
Sharjinka: I'm not sure what to do yet. I plan to consult books and
see what they suggest.
evile: *nod*
evile: You don't have to be mean, but you do have to be firm and
consistent.
Sharjinka: I'm on my way out. ;-) I plan to be.
evile: OK *hugs*
Sharjinka: *hugs* Thanks for all the support and encouragement.
evile: No problem, girlfriend.

comments

3248Re: internet stalking

2022-06-11T17:55:31Z

Expand Messages

May 31, 2005

Date: Tue, 31 May 2005 18:49:52 UT
From: "senni - LJ Comment"
Subject: Re: Very cool about Butch!

Ankhesenwesir (senni) replied to your LiveJournal comment in which you
said:

> I read the SA filmmaking yahoo group, so I am somewhat tangentially

up on

> what Ross is up to. And Mike T. and I trade emails & phone calls
> sporadically.

> Add away...not much goes on in my life. I'm a low level bureaucrat
> working for the State, living in Austin, not married, but I've been

with

> the same guy for almost 10 yrs now, we own a house & have two cats.

Their reply was:

Subject: Re: Very cool about Butch!

I'm part of the SA filmmaking yahoo group too!!!

I'm living with my husband who I met in 1992 and we've been married
7
years. I can't have children so we have a hord of small dogs and
one
cat.

My husband works at the zoo and I am on disability. So I'm at home
most
of the day. Ross and I are supposed to go out for coffee sometime
this
summer when I lose the weight I've gained. I was on Seroquel which
makes
a person gain weight. I just got off of it and the pounds are
coming
off.
Thank God.

I'm still the woman in black. As you know I am Kemetic but no
longer
a
member of "the house of Netjer". They turned out to be a Cult.
Anyway, I
still worship the Egyptian God Netjer and It's many forms. For me,
I
am a
child of Osiris and Beloved of Isis and Anubis. My Kemetic name is
Ankhesenwesir and it means "She lives for Osiris". I was named this
while
in the house of Netjer. Senni is the short version. It's almost the
same
name as King Tut's wife Ankhesenaten/Ankhesenamun. They called her
Senni
too.

Let's see.. I've been reading a new book on magic in ancient egypt
and
the last movie I saw was "The Longest Yard" with my beloved Adam
Sandler.
If you haven't seen "The Wedding Singer" I suggest you get a copy.
It
is
set in 1985 and for us 80's folks... it is hilarious. Everyone I've
shown
it to loved it.

That's all for now. My life is pretty boring. Chris

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comments

3246Craft nite at Sharjinka's

2022-06-11T17:51:16Z

May 25, 2005

Tonight I went to Sharjinka's craft night. I was the only one there,
so we went walking and talked and had a nice visit. She is thinking
of adopting a greyhound. That is so cool. She and Skye_ds had a tiff
about whether or not mounted combat games should be part of HFS, so
we talked about that, too. I agree 100% that they should NOT, and at
any rate A is not going about it right; she needs to join the
kingdom, pay dues, vote, and bring her game plan & rules to one of
the biannual meetings where they decide on new games/rules to become
part of their 'corpora'. As it is now, the kids who play on her
horses are NOT covered by their HFS waivers, since they are not
participating in an HFS sanctioned activity. It is going to take
something nasty to get UB off that track...not a kid dying, because
she won't care: "Hey, he signed the waiver! He knew it was
dangerous", but her horses being impounded/destroyed. That will suck,
for everyone...I hate her.

comments

3242icq w/Sharjinka

2022-06-11T17:44:28Z

May 24, 2005

Sharjinka: *sigh* So much for that idea....
evile: which?
Sharjinka: I talked to Skye_ds about mounted combat and horses....and
beginners on horses that advanced.
evile: You are trying ot talk her into this idea or out of this idea
or what?
Sharjinka: I was trying to tell her to slow down and train the kids
more on basic riding. I failed miserably.
evile: where was this?ICQ or on one of hte boards?
Sharjinka: On AIM.
Sharjinka: I was trained VERY differently on horses than Skye_ds.
evile: I'm sure.
Sharjinka: I told her I couldn't support something like this. Not
this fast.
Sharjinka: Mounted combat on horses that they have trouble
controlling their paces?
evile: I hear ya. I think it's a terrible idea...but she'll have to
learn it the hard way, and hopefully it won't take more than a bad
fall to teach it to her (as opposed to a break or a death, leading
to lawsuit and/or extermination of the animals)
Sharjinka: I hope not! Geez!
Sharjinka: I'm so worried about this and I thought if I talked to
her... she's only worried about protecting herself legally. I'm
worried about more than that.
evile: Tell me what happens to horses that throw/trample people and
then the survivors sue the owners...horsie is dogmeat, right?
Sharjinka: I think so......I've heard of that in worse case scenarios.
Sharjinka: It's very rare.....but it's kind of like putting down a
mean dog. It can happen.
evile: If you can't present it to her framed in a "safety of the
kids" format, present it to her as "if your animals hurt/kill a kid,
your animals are meat"
Sharjinka: I don't think she's willing to listen anymore. She was
mad at me for questioning her judgment on this.
evile: She's the 'horse expert' and she knows everything there is to
know about horses, riding, and mounted combat.
Sharjinka: They haven't even been doing mounted combat that long!
evile: nope.
Sharjinka: I know on the ground combat. Freaky things CAN happen.
Sharjinka: On horses.....I'm having trouble figuring out what all
could go wrong...but I don't like to think along those lines.
evile: I hate to say it, but it's going to take something really bad
to shake her confidence in her 'expertise', and maybe not even then.
Sharjinka: Yes....but what bad thing? I'm worried about the kids.
Protected legally - okay...all well and good but if one of the kids
is seriously injured....
evile: You can't prevent them from signing the waiver and going
riding...all stables have signs that horseback riding is a risk and
you assume all responsibilities. ... I"m sorry, but that's the truth.
Sharjinka: Yes...I know. *sigh* I signed the same waiver when I was
learning. :-)
Sharjinka: My horse instructor never claimed to be an expert. The
first thing she handed me was a shovel and pitchfork.
Sharjinka: She said something about "to ride a horse is to care for
it, can't learn one thing and not anything else."
evile: You are definitely running worst case scenarios. She doesn't
want anyone hurt any more than you do...well, that's good of her, her
heart is in the right place, but....shit happens, and it's gonna
happen whether your'e there with horses or not. A kid could fall out
of a tree while playing assasin and break their arm, just as easily
as falling off the horse.

Sharjinka: That's true.
Sharjinka: *sigh*
Sharjinka: I just wish they'd spend a bit more time working on the
basics.
evile: yup. But she doesn't hear that, she hears you attacking her
knowledge and expertise.
Sharjinka: I know. *sigh*
Sharjinka: I think she got really upset when I told her I wouldn't be
a part of it. I'm not going to ride and I'm not going to learn
mounted combat. I can't control Jesse enough for that.
evile: *nod* good for you. Now hopefully you can trust that others in
the HFS will follow your lead and not do something they dont' feel
safe doing.
Sharjinka: If I thought I could do it, I would. I just don't think
it's safe. I think there is too much machismo from the guys to see
it that way.
Sharjinka: She asked if I planned to talk anyone out of it since they
aren't minors and can ride if they want. I told her it wasn't my
right to tell them what to do.
Sharjinka: If they ask why I don't, I'll just tell them I'm not good
enough or comfortable enough to do that.
evile: *nod*
Sharjinka: I honestly wish people so inexperienced wouldn't ride.
evile: yeah...but how do they get experienced if they dont' ride?
Sharjinka: True....but ....I don't know. I learned the walking and
trotting first. I started out so basic. I guess I just think it's a
lot for a newbie to handle all at once.
evile: yeah. I agree. I wouldnt' try it and I've been riding since I
was a kid.
Sharjinka: I've been watching and thinking about it. I wish I could
do it. I just know that I can't.
evile: That's all you can do...and perhaps some people will be led by
your example.
Sharjinka: Yep. Someday I'll have my own horse and then I'll know
what I'm talking about. It's more of gut instincts and warning
lights then logic right now.
evile: well, it's just like anything else dangerous/unsuitable your
friends get into. You can choose not to do it, you can answer honesty
and completely when they ask WHY, and then you have to let them go.
You can't control anyone but yourself. And you shouldn't try.
Sharjinka: I know. :-) I just know that right now, this is the
decision I have to make on it.
Sharjinka: I have to learn how to handle a dog. This will be my
first dog that wasn't a family pet. Completely my responsibility.
evile: *nod*
Sharjinka: I'm not even sure I can handle THAT! ;-)
evile: Dogs are a lot of work. I wouldn't want one.
Sharjinka: I know. I'm a bit worried.
evile: well, this is a trial period, so it'll be good to find out if
you can handle it.
Sharjinka: 45mph couch potato....
Sharjinka: Yep, yep. I'm going to stress the trial period when he
drops off the dog.
evile: *nod*
Sharjinka: :-D
evile: I've heard/read that having 2 is just as easy (or hard) as
having 1, and then at least they can keep each other company. If Sweetie
and I ever have dogs agian, we are going to get 2.
Sharjinka: It's been recommended that I get 2. I just don't know if
I can afford that right now.
evile: well, like I said, I've heard/read that it's not really any
harder or more expensive to have 2 instead of 1.
Sharjinka: I might think about it again. I'm just worried about
responsibility levels. I've never done this before.
evile: hence the 'trial'
Sharjinka: Yep. :-)
Sharjinka: I'm bringing him out to the park on Sunday. :-D
evile: cool. I hope I'm in town, but still have no idea whether I
will be here or not.
Sharjinka: I was planning on going to Scarborough but I think that
would be a trauma for the dog. ;-)
evile: yup. YOu'd have to get a sitter.
Sharjinka: I'm not going to. :-)
Sharjinka: I hope Chip handles cars okay.
evile: I guess you'll find out!
Sharjinka: Yep. :-D
evile: I told Skye she probably needed to take some time to calm down,
and she signed off ICQ right after that....I probably pissed her off
by not playing drama with her or agreeing that you're unreasonable.
Sharjinka: Thanks.
Sharjinka: I wish I wasn't so nervous about.... I just wish the
training would slow down and be a bit more basic and thorough.
evile: Well, maybe if you both give it some time and try to talk
about it again after you've calmed down, you can bring across your
concerns without making her feel like you're attacking her expertise.
Sharjinka: Yeah...I think you're right. As always. :-D
evile: Bottom line, if your friends want to do dangerous stupid
things, there's nothing you can do to stop them. Your concerns have
been voiced, that's all you can do....
Sharjinka: Yeah...that's true.
evile: You may just want to drop it....you're not going to convince
her that she's not doing the right thing, and you're not going to
convince her that HFS+Equestrian=bad idea ...she's the only one with
horses in HFS, as opposed to SCA, and she wants to make herself feel
special.
evile: If people don't have fun and/or get hurt, they won't play with
her horses for long. I've noticed more and more people being
uninterested in the animals the longer they keep going out there.
Wait it out, eventually everyone will lose interest and she'll find
something else to do with herself and her animals.
Sharjinka: You're right.
evile: She seemed to have a nice time at my house last night, but
then apparently she decided that people were attacking her and I was
egging them on, so she sicced sineater on me. Probably as a smokescreen
to keep from really thinking about the HFS-Horses problem very hard.
evile: I don't care to be a punching bag for her and sineater. I don't
think I'll invite t hem to anything anymore. Sucks for sineater, because
I like him, but I can't have that mess in my life.
Sharjinka: I'm sorry. :-( I didn't bring up the horse problem until
today.
Sharjinka: Wonder why she was so pissed....
Sharjinka: She always seems that way.....
evile: I think she didn't decide until today that she'd
been 'attacked' last night.
evile: Been doing the same bullshit since her 'bachelorette party'
before she adnd sineater got married.
Sharjinka: I really don't understand her at all. *sigh*
evile: sineater's 2 oldest female friends threw her a party (becasue
apparently she had none of her own) and things got ugly, but then
calmed down again, s he left all s miles, 'we'll have you over for
swimming and hottubbing at our new place, bla bla' and then by the
time she got home, she'd worked herself into a fury and sicced sineater
on us.
evile: Fast forward 13 goddamned years and she's still pulling the
same damn shit.
Sharjinka: Yeah.....
Sharjinka: She's a scary person to deal with. I don't think I've
ever spoken up until now.
evile: And now you know why you don't.
Sharjinka: *sigh*
evile: you're not going to convince her you're right. She's not going
to convince you she's right. You may have to just tell her "I am
agreeing to disagree" and perhaps say you'll press for destruction of
the animals if they hurt or kill any of your kids.
Sharjinka: I don't think I could ever do that.... However....if
something that serious did happen, the horses would be banned from
the park.
evile: No, Jinx, here is where you go ultrabitch and make clear that
there WILL be consequences for her poor choices. Those animals kill
your kids, those animals are DEAD
Sharjinka: Oh.....
evile: If the risk is as bad as you fear it is, then it's time to
make clear that she is taking a very LARGE risk in pursuing HFS
equestrian.
evile: If you care about the kids as much as you say, and fear for
them as much as you say you do...then here is where the line gets
drawn.
Sharjinka: If only we had more experienced horse folks and we were
moving a bit slower, I think I'd be okay with it.
evile: You need to make clear to her exactly how much you fear for
their safety and how far you will go to protect your people.
evile: If she sees it as concern and genuine, abject TERROR for the
worst case scenario, rather than an attack on her 'expertise' maybe
she can remove her ego and do what's right
Sharjinka: She has never struck me as being that sort of person.
She's got it in her head and I'm not sure she's willing to drop it.
evile: that is why you need to make it clear what,e xactly, she is
risking by going forward with her choices.
evile: a kid gets hurt? so what, she doesn't get hurt, she doesn't
care. They signed a waiver, that covers her ass. A kid gets hurt and
something of hers is destroyed as a result, she'll care about THAT.
Sharjinka: You may be right there.....
evile: I know I am
Sharjinka: I don't know if....I'm strong enough to threaten like
that.
evile: If you can't, find someone in authority in Drandmir who CAN.
Goofy?
Sharjinka: Maybe. I think I should try and talk to her face to face
about this again and see if I can't reason it out.
evile: let it sit for a few days first.
evile: And be prepared to escalate if/when she won't back down.
Sharjinka: Yep, I will. :-)
Sharjinka: Oh.... :-(

evile: I'm just saying. I think if you can get her to take ego out of
it, you may be able to get her to agree to take it slower.
evile: But most/all of her identity and what makes her like herself
and feel like a likeable person is in her 'way with animals'
evile: So if she feels that is being attacked, that is her core
identity and she will react badly.
Sharjinka: It makes perfect sense.
Sharjinka: I think a few days to think about this and try to come up
with a solution is the best thing to do.
Sharjinka: I want my temper to calm down a bit but I don't really
feel that upset. But sometimes I don't feel upset and if the button
is pushed, I'm surprised to find out that I am. :-D
Sharjinka: Does that make any sense at all?
evile: Yup. It makes perfect sense. Just take as long as you need to
get calm and control your behavior as much as you can. You can't
control feelings, just outward behavior.
Sharjinka: Right! Gotta catch the bus. Bye.
evile: OK. *hugs*

comments

3239ICQ w/A (teh crazy 'snarking' and 'egging')

2022-06-11T17:33:40Z

May 24, 2005

evile: Made it home safe, I take it?
SkyeDS: no. lol.
evile: no?
SkyeDS: j/k
evile: Oh good. I was afraid you were going to say you'd had a fender
bender or something.
SkyeDS: sineater talked to me the whole way to keep me awake.
SkyeDS: I wasn't sleepy but it made him feel better.
evile: that was nice of him
SkyeDS: it was, because he doesn't like using the phone except as an
exchange of information.
evile: *nod* me too.
evile: Did y'all have enough fun? I don't remember sineater saying 'bye
to me before he left, but I did overhear him saying 'bye' to someone
else.
SkyeDS: I probably should have left when he did, but as usual I can
resist everything but temptation.
evile: I worried that you'd be too tired to drive safely, but you're
a grownup, so I didn't nag.
SkyeDS: nope, was wide awake
evile: *nod*
SkyeDS: reason why I drank one glass of sangria immediately and a sip
of port and stopped there
SkyeDS: and no food
SkyeDS: food = food coma
evile: Oh, Ok then.
SkyeDS: I hope I wasn't too much of an embarassment
evile: I don't think so.
SkyeDS: well, if you think I carried myself well, then I will go with
that.
evile: I noticed that you started out doing the nervous motormouth
thing, but once that passed, I think you were fine. :)
SkyeDS: you used to say the same thing about Chance.
evile: *nod* i think a lot of people do that, it's pretty normal.
SkyeDS: you revised your opinion of Chance, which you don't do, very
often.
evile: *shrug* I'm trying to get better about that.
SkyeDS: did I pass the snarky bitch test?
evile: I don't have any idea; we're not a hive-mind, as much as it
might appear to be so from a distance :P
SkyeDS: I was very happy to meet kulilinei, ladydreamtime, argonarcher and Katy's man
whose name I forgot with the talking stick :(
SkyeDS: Nikiyoy says we've met many times before but I don't remember
SkyeDS: somewhat bothersome that I am more memorable to her than she
is to me
evile: *nod* At least one poly dinner that I know of.
SkyeDS: I've only been to two.
SkyeDS: two does not "many times before" make, imo.
evile: Possibly some PNO or CMA thing? I dunno.
SkyeDS: won't be the first time someone remembers me and not the
other way around
evile: *nod*
SkyeDS: sineater is on phone
evile: OK
SkyeDS: he asked me to ask you if there was anyway he could call you
on your cell phone while you're at work or what
SkyeDS: since he can't IM
evile: I am not free to talk openly at work, due to coworker
nosiness. Can he msg me via email, or LJ, maybe?
SkyeDS: he says email works :)
evile: Plus my cell is only 60 minutes a month, so I don't really use
it for 'conversation' type stuff.
evile: I check my yahoo email several times a day.
evile: Other than what you see in LJ, and a nice emailed 'thank you'
from argonarcher, there hasn't been much other conversation about last
night. I guess that means it went well.
SkyeDS: was it not obvious?
SkyeDS: I thought it was obvious...and I'm dense.
SkyeDS: I'm also on the verge of retreating into cave/well/hermit
phase, I think. I can feel it pulling at me, hard.
evile: I'm just waiting for someone to complain about something or
mention something that someone did that made them uncomfortable.
SkyeDS: you want to know or you don't want to know
evile: Of course I want to know. Unless it's something about the
weather, which I had no control over.
SkyeDS: and I haven't read LJ today, Hugh is litigating and that puts
him in a bad mood and means that I have to toe a line
evile: *nod*
SkyeDS: what if some personal discomfort had nothing to do with you?
and might have been a personal problem that just needs resolving
personally
SkyeDS: ala Ruiz #2 (Don't Take it Personally)
SkyeDS: and of course, I can't speak for anyone but myself (including
of course, sineater)
evile: *nod*
evile: The thing that killed me about the picnic in the park (My Last
Party, officially) is that people complained afterwards about the
heat, dirt, and bugs. None of which are anything I could do anything
about--it was an outdoor party, these things exist outdoors.
evile: But if the food was unpleasant, or one of the guests did or
said something impolite, that's something I could at least attempt to
remedy.
SkyeDS: I'm not sure whether to take some of the snarks as aimed at
me personally or not
SkyeDS: I decided under #2 not to
SkyeDS: until snarkster started bragging about double bitch points
for snarking at someone's face and getting away with it because
person was so stupid they didn't know they were being snarked
evile: I don't know who/what you're talking about, so I can't really
help you with the judgement on that
SkyeDS: and I restrained myself to pointing out that there is such a
thing as not being deaf
SkyeDS: but deliberately ignoring
SkyeDS: because this whole snark thing, when someone is snarking
someone present, seems damned if you do and damned if you don't.
evile: When Nikiyoy was talking about snarking the new BF's ex?
SkyeDS: the right thing, I am convinced, is to ignore
SkyeDS: no, when she was snarking at me.
evile: I didn't hear it.
SkyeDS: but then if you ignore, they give themselves double bitch
points
SkyeDS: which I suppose one should also ignore
evile: I have no context to judge whether or not your perceptions
mirror the actual events.
SkyeDS: because if you say, hey, I know you're doing it, I'm not
stupidly oblivious, I'm ignoring you, because you aren't worth a reply
SkyeDS: then that's a mistake too
SkyeDS: sineater asked me what happened with her last comment about
jousting and whether or not you were egging her on
SkyeDS: and I've already told him, I'm not even going there
SkyeDS: I didn't hear it
evile: Who said what to whom in what reply?
SkyeDS: I'm not going there, I'm not getting into it. I'm going to
handle my side of things, myself.
SkyeDS: I've already stated, I'm not sure if my perception was right
wrong shared or whatever.
evile: Like I said, we're not a hive mind. There are people I dont'
like that others in our group do. There are people I like that others
in the group do not.
evile: I think we have a general agreement that if it's your house,
you invite who you like and if others have a problem with it, they
need to be polite and respectful regardless of personal feelings.
evile: The only thing I remember hearing from Nikiyoy was talking about
snarking her new boyfriends GF.
SkyeDS: the whole entire reason I didn't even want to mention this is
because you said before you didn't think I could handle the snarky
bitches and I don't want you using this as reason to think you were
correct.
SkyeDS: I think I handled it just fine.
SkyeDS: there were several snarks that I weren't sure were aimed at
me particularly until the very end of the evening
SkyeDS: and I may still have been wrong.
SkyeDS: so I liked my response just fine, because it was suitable
whether it was personal or not
SkyeDS: which was to tell her, just because people don't react to you
snarking them to their face doesn't mean they don't know you're doing
it, it means they're choosing to ignore you, because your snarks
aren't worth the effort.
evile: Well, I'm glad you didn't get ugly and/or let your fears
cause you to leave early, anyway.
SkyeDS: I hsould have left when sineater did because of work
SkyeDS: and because those who like to poke at me like to do it when
he isn't around
SkyeDS: but I made that decision and I lived with it just fine
SkyeDS: even if I am falling over sleepy now
evile: *shrug* I didnt' see it. Nikiyoy is young and a bit sharp, I
really wouldn't take her personally.
SkyeDS: I'm trying not to.
SkyeDS: sineater thought she seemed unhappy and poky at eveyrone and
everything all night long.
SkyeDS: I completely agree with that assessment.
SkyeDS: I have this feeling of why me, what the hell did I ever do to
her?
evile: And if you were perceiving me as 'egging' anyone on, that is
flat out incorrect. I was trying to have a nice time and see that my
guests did so as well.
SkyeDS: that because it isn't logic, it's an emotion, isn't going to
be reasoned with.
SkyeDS: egging on = his perception, not mine
SkyeDS: I have no opinion about that one way or the other.
SkyeDS: I will deal with the why me, what the hell did I do to
deserve that shit, on my own, because it's my shit, and I'll own it
SkyeDS: and that's the reason I didn't even want to say anything
SkyeDS: and only said something because I don't want it laid at my
feet that I didn't say anything and should have.
evile: I was making conversation & trying to keep things light and
pleasant. I have absolutely *zero* interest in making people unhappy
and causing fights among my friends and loved ones in my home.
SkyeDS: if people don't say things, it might be because they don't
want to upset you, and they're trying to take responsibility for
their own shit.
evile: My hostess persona gives me a good out. When people start to
say anything boring, tactless, or needlessly self-aggrandizing, I
just find something else that needs my immediate attention.
SkyeDS: I don't like the place I'm in right now at all
SkyeDS: if I say something I'm wrong
SkyeDS: if I don't say something I'm wrong
SkyeDS: and all I want to do is own my shit, learn from this obstacle
and further myself along my path of intention
evile: You are the one sticking the 'wrong' label on yourself. I am
not doing or saying anything, because I didnt' see or percieve what
you did.
SkyeDS: I mean wrong in saying anything to you.
SkyeDS: ie, saying something to you is wrong, not saying something to
you is wrong, and all I want to do is deal with the feelings and get
them out of my system
evile: You are still teh one applying the 'wrong' label. I am just
here.
evile: You have the right to your feelings. Not all of my friends are
going to get along with all of my other friends. If you don't like
Nikiyoy and feel that she was being deliberately abrasive towards you,
that is your perception and welcome to it.
SkyeDS: I didn't want to say anything because a) I might have
misperceived and b) if I didn't misperceive, it's still my situation
to handle, and I don't want to involve anyone else.
SkyeDS: but I know you get upset when you feel like people horde
things to throw at you later
SkyeDS: and I ahte that too
SkyeDS: and I didn't want to do that
SkyeDS: or be perceived as doing that
SkyeDS: so I'm saying, this had nothing to do with you.
evile: I really wouldn't take Nikiyoy personally, if I was you, or let
her bother you for too long. I don't know what was said or in what
context, if I was there I didn't see it or hear it the same way you
did because Nikiyoy and I are much closer friends than you and she are...
evile: her sense of humor is sometimes abrasive/cruel. I really don't
think she means anything by it.
SkyeDS: I can't stop you from thinking that I can't handle snarks
aimed at me
SkyeDS: if they were truly aimed at me, I handled them just fine
SkyeDS: and if they weren't aimed at me, then it says nothing about
whether I can handle them aimed at me or not.
evile: *nod*
SkyeDS: and for the record I've already told sineater if he wants to know
anything that was said outside of my earshot he'll have to ask you,
I'll be no part of it.
evile: *nod*
SkyeDS: I don't want to go there (you know where there is) again,
anymore than you do, believe me.
evile: Honestly, you aren't really a topic of conversation as much as
you might think/hope. We do have other things to think and speak
about.
SkyeDS: you can scratch hope
SkyeDS: being topic of conversation = usually bad
evile: Like, wer'e not going to get together next Monday and take
votes on who likes skye, or anything like that...really, truly,
that's NOT what we're about
SkyeDS: that's not my perception. Have already said, I know when
shit's my shit, and I'm dealing with it.
SkyeDS: I just don't want to be accused of not saying things when I
should have.
SkyeDS: when I've thought I should say something, I got burned
SkyeDS: when I've thought I shouldn't say something, I got burned
SkyeDS: so I'm about at the place where I'm going to do what I damn
well please because I"m going to get burned regardless
evile: Bottom line: If you feel you handled snarks that were aimed at
you with dignity, then you need to quit sticking the 'wrong' label on
the interaction.
SkyeDS: I will assume if you perceived that I acted with less than
dignity you would say so
evile: And if you think I did or said something deliberately
offensive, let me assure you I did not. I was seeking (and mostly
think I had) a pleasant evening at home with friends & loved ones.
evile: Stirring up shit between people I like is not conducive to
having a pleasant evening at home, therefore I didn't do it, and
wouldn't do it.
SkyeDS: I didn't think otherwise
SkyeDS: what anyone else thinks = not my problem
evile: yup
SkyeDS: even if that person is "close" to me
SkyeDS: I am applying the "wrong" label to whether or not I should
say something to you about my feelings about the whole thing when you
ask
SkyeDS: and I'm at the point right now where if someone else is going
to apply that label to me no matter what I do, well, I can't do a
damn thing about that, and there's no point in even trying anymore.
evile: *shrug* You told me your thoughts/ feelings, my resulting
thoughts/feelings are my responsibility.
SkyeDS: I think there are questions people shouldn't ask because they
really don't want to know the answers
SkyeDS: but, a direct question deserves a direct answer.
evile: Well, I knew that eventually someone was going to come up with
a reason why last night wasn't as fun as I thought it was, better to
hear it now from the person involved rather than later.
SkyeDS: if I wasn't having fun I would have left pretty soon after
sineater did
SkyeDS: the balance of the other personalities was much more
important to me than just one other
SkyeDS: Kulilinei did not look in person much like her LJ icon, her LJ
icon does not do her justice
evile: *nod*
SkyeDS: and that's the first time I've had teh chance to meet Argon
Eric
SkyeDS: I'm happy that there seems to be no ill will with knighthorse
evile: *nod*
SkyeDS: and I enjoyed ladydreamtime, maggiemaepisces, aple and Katy's Shaman (what is his
name?)
evile: knighthorse and Kili are not joined at the hip. Her enemies are not
automatically his.
evile: Keith.
SkyeDS: he is a much different personality with kulilinei than with Kili
SkyeDS: some people's behavior is more influenced by who is in their
surroundings than others
evile: I suspect it is actually Kai that makes the difference; knighthorse
as 'dad' is slightly softer than knighthorse the guy.
SkyeDS: Kulilinei/Kai = package deal (or should be)
evile: yup
SkyeDS: Ashia (divine ambrosia) is like that
SkyeDS: very pleasant when she's around some people but not when
she's around others
SkyeDS: much more like that than knighthorse
evile: I've never seen knighthorse be unpleasant.
SkyeDS: since he didn't respond to my "if I offended you I'm s orry"
apology, I didn't know what to think/expect
evile: Probably in the same way Sweetie avoids getting embroiled in my
family bullshit, knighthorse figured he'd do the same--it wasn't his fight,
why should he get involved, one way or the other.
SkyeDS: well, since I was interacting with him and not her, I was
concerned about offending him, and not her.
SkyeDS: I respect the intellect I encountered, I really d on't give a
damn about her lack thereof.
evile: *nod*
SkyeDS: that's why I wrote him, and not her, to say, if I offended,
I'm sorry, such was the farthest thing from my intent.
evile: He probably thinks the whole thing was silly & blown out of
proportion, didn't care to dignify the tempest in a teapot with any
more wind.
SkyeDS: I hope so, because that's much preferable to harboring
unspoken ill will.
SkyeDS: that's why I was pleased that there didn't seem to be any.
SkyeDS: matter of fact, it wouldn't have occurred to me to even
apologize should I have offended
SkyeDS: until she told sineater that I offended everyone there and not
just her.
SkyeDS: since I happen to give a damn, whether I should or not, about
what Terriblelyne, savanni, knighthorse and Robin think, I thought if that was the
case I should apologize.
evile: Whatever. Kili assumes that her actions and feelings are of
paramount importance to the entire world, and that if she's
offended,of course everyone else will be too...whereas the reality
was that nobody but the 2 of you realized t here was anything to be
upset over.
SkyeDS: only thing that upsets me is people being upset with me
SkyeDS: it was the same feeling..."what the hell did I do to deserve
this from her?"
evile: *nod*
SkyeDS: and baring the neck and saying look, I didn't want a fight,
doesn't work
SkyeDS: and that's the reason I'm getting about tired of people and
at the point where just about everyone I know can go take a flying
fuck
SkyeDS: I seem to be upsetting people everywhere I turn lately, so it
must be me, and I need to remove myself until I can figure out what
the hell I'm doing, and stop
evile: If you need to hermit for awhile, you should.
SkyeDS: Sharjinka is radiating unhappiness about my migrating the
games to the HFS
evile: I think she has safety concerns.
SkyeDS: so she said
SkyeDS: and I asked her, well, do you doubt my personal and
professional judgment?
SkyeDS: and she said no
SkyeDS: she doesn't seem to be able to separate her concerns for
herself, and everyone else
SkyeDS: I told her look, I respect your concerns, I won't ever again
ask you if you want to participate, cool
SkyeDS: and thought that should be the end of that
SkyeDS: and she wanted to continue debating whether the other people
involved should be
SkyeDS: and I'm sorry but that's not her call
evile: She's a good rider, from what I understand. I think she's
worried about the kids with no riding experience getting up and
trying to do mounted battle without knowing safe riding basics first.
SkyeDS: the people she thinks don't have experience do
SkyeDS: and are not just vetted by me, but by one of the only three
golden lancers in the SCA
SkyeDS: Chris/Keject specifically
SkyeDS: and as I pointed out to her, he is a safer rider than either
sineater or sonar0m or me for that matter
SkyeDS: she was going on and on about minors, and I said what minors?
SkyeDS: there was no reasoning with her.
SkyeDS: and since I have adopted the safety standards that have
worked for decades with the SCA, and there is no demonstrable reason
not to trust my personal and professional judgment, I don't see the
point in debating.
SkyeDS: and I did my very best to alleviate whatever bad feelings
were going on, I tried like three times, and she was having none of
it.
SkyeDS: and I know that I'm supposed to be giving sources of
negativity a silent blessing and avoiding them.. and it hurts to do
so when one of them is ostensibly my friend.
evile: Just because she is worried about something, doesn't mean
she's not your frend.
SkyeDS: she seethes with her worries like a volcano.
evile: She feels very protective of the 'kids' in HFS. I empathize
SkyeDS: she seemed most worried about keject
SkyeDS: keject is not a minor
SkyeDS: keject has not only been vetted by me but by one of the three
best equestrian officials in the SCA
SkyeDS: case closed, far as I'm concerned
evile: it's like driving...you're a fine driver, but the drunk idiot
going the wrong way at high speeds will still kill your safety-minded
ass.
SkyeDS: and the last thing I needed today was a bunch of
recriminations about how I should not let keject ride Jesse
SkyeDS: she comes from a different school than I do where horses are
concerned and that's fine
SkyeDS: I have no problem with agreeing to disagree, but that takes
two.
SkyeDS: and she isn't having any of it.
evile: That's too bad. I would say if they are adults and they give
informed consent, it's their own tough shit if they get broken or
killed riding...says so on every riding stable I've seen.
SkyeDS: exactly.
SkyeDS: I tried to explain to her why I operate the way I do, and
that didn't go well at all
SkyeDS: so then I said, well, ok, I know you don't think the same
way, adn that's cool, let's jsut agree to disagree
SkyeDS: and no dice.
SkyeDS: and I've already said, I'm not going to let her volcanic
emotions ruin my experience at Drandmir.
evile: *nod*
SkyeDS: it's just hard to have all that washing over me
SkyeDS: it's overwhelming.
evile: yeah, I'm sure.
SkyeDS: I'm already dealing with one case of what the hell did I do,
I didn't need another one blindsiding me
SkyeDS: all I did was tell her, got Prophet in the saddle with a
sword sunday, now we're just waiting on you
SkyeDS: and all she had to do was say, no, don't want to, quit asking
me, and that would have sufficed
SkyeDS: I didn't need the riot act
SkyeDS: when I asked her directly, was it her intention to question
my methods because they weren't her methods, she said no, and then
went right back to doing just exactly that.
evile: *nod*
SkyeDS: she's worried someone will sue the HFS and win
SkyeDS: well, everyone that rides HFS combat, to my knowledge, has
signed my waiver AND the HFS waiver
SkyeDS: she seems to think that I have not considered and covered my
bases, even when I'm using a tried and true system of security safety
and protection, and nevermind that I"m not exactly untutored in
legalities.
evile: yup. Everyone will do their best to be safe and play safe, and
if something happens (as it can even on the ground, I've seen padded
pvc break and scratch the fuck out of someone's face)...it happens,
and everyone will have to deal at that point.
SkyeDS: she's being overly paranoid about something new and she even
admitted as much
SkyeDS: I'm actually glad she decided to just leave and go to lunch
SkyeDS: because not a damn thing I could say was stemming the tide
SkyeDS: thankfully Hugh just went to lunch, so I can get the tears
out of my system. Now if the phone will just oblige me by not
ringing.
evile: yup. She's definitely running worst case scenarios in her
mind. She doesn't want anyone hurt...well, that's good of her, her
heart is in the right place, but....shit happens, and it's gonna
happen whether your'e there with horses or not. A kid could fall out
of a tree while playing assasin and break their arm, just as easily
as falling off the horse.
SkyeDS: crying at work = bad thing.
evile: sometimes ya gotta cry.
evile: It sounds to me like you're feeling bad about one situation
and letting it color your perceptions about another unrelated
situation.
SkyeDS: I am overwhelmed because the same situation seems to keep
reiterating itself recurringly
SkyeDS: it's hard not to let perceptions be colored when the same
thing happens often enough to make it a pattern.
evile: It could be that you are seeing similarities where none exist,
or only exist superficially.
SkyeDS: people radiating serious levels of upset with me every time I
turn around is not superficial to me.
SkyeDS: and the more people who are upset with me, the more I am
inclined to think I must be doing something to bring it all about
evile: I seriously doubt anyone was upset with you at my house last
night...I t hink you were just tired and upset from fussing with
Jinx, and took things personally that were not meant for you to take
personally
SkyeDS: Jinx was this morning
evile: perhaps that's been building longer than you realize? or maybe
t here is something else going on that put you in a frame of mind to
feel snarked/victimized
SkyeDS: no, pretty much every time something sets her off I feel
blindsided
evile: you're a lot more intuitive t han you realize, I think. She's
been worried about the horses being out at HFS for quite some time,
if you recall.
SkyeDS: and every time she says that's what's really bothering her,
it was something else.
evile: *nod*
SkyeDS: provably something else.
SkyeDS: sineater and sonar0m do something similar but not completely
SkyeDS: they get upset, and they don't know what about
SkyeDS: so there's not a damn thing I can do about it
SkyeDS: I don't even know whether it's me, or something else.
evile: *nod* it's tough to deal with.
SkyeDS: I just didn't need a Sharjinka rant about the horses right now
this minute
evile: well, that seems to happen a lot...you're in a bad mental
space and more and more shit gets shoveled on top of you.
evile: But consider this: on a happy day when everything was going
right for you, would any one of these things mess with you? No.
You're just reacting and reacting and reacting and letting things be
more upsetting than they would be as individual events.
SkyeDS: things by themselves no
SkyeDS: same t hing over and over again = pattern
SkyeDS: pattern I brought upon myself, some way some how, so I have
to figure it out so I can make it go away
evile: The only thing you have control over is your behavior. As long
as you continue to behave in a way that you feel is appropriate,
that's all anyone can ask.
SkyeDS: my feeling that I am responding appropriately can't be right
if it's creating this pattern
evile: I say rest and get your hermit time and see if that gives you
some perspective to deal with the latest challenges.
SkyeDS: there are a number of people whom I am not creating this
pattern with
SkyeDS: so maybe it isn't entirely hermit time
evile: could be.
SkyeDS: why would I be creating this with some people and not with
others.
evile: You are not going to get along with everyone in the world,
ever, no matter how kind, generous, decent, well-adjusted, etc. you
may attempt to be.
evile: Some personalities just dont' mesh.
evile: It's nobody's fault...you like horses and birds and SCA and
Person A has no interest in any of that and likes things you're not
interested in, too.
SkyeDS: upsets with people that I do share those interests with
upsets me
SkyeDS: ie, SCA upsets, and Sharjinka/HFS upsets
evile: Well, even within interests, not everyone is going to be
friends automatically, and even friends are not going to agree with
each other 100% all the time. You just have to decide if the
disagreement is going to be a deal breaker on the friendship, or
participation in the group.
SkyeDS: upsets don't have to be dealbreakers, but if I'm doing
something to cause them, I need to figure it out so I can stop.
SkyeDS: before they become dealbreakers.
SkyeDS: decided already a while back that I wasn't going to let
Sharjinka be a dealbreaker. She decides whatever she decides but I'm
going to keep doing what I've been doing regardless.
SkyeDS: but if people in all these different venues are upset with me
I must be doing something, and I need to figure it out or I won't
stop.
evile: I don't see 'all these different'. I see one.
evile: Sharjinka has said she doesn't want to do mounted combat,
that's her right. She has said she doesn't think it's safe for you to
have other peopel doing it...that's not her call to make. From there,
you both choose how to react and how to continue the relationship
SkyeDS: I've expressed that I've made that call myself, as it was my
call to make, and why I make t he calls I do. Why doesn't it end
there?
evile: You say people were snarking and attacking you, I say I didn't
see it. You may or may not have chosen to take a general statement as
a personal attack..you wisely chose to react appropriately and
discreetly. Now you can choose to let it go, or you can choose to
approach Nikiyoy, or you can choose to continue to let yourself be upset
over something that may or may not have been intendet to upset you.
SkyeDS: I respect her decisions on her own behalf, what the hell is
wrong with agreeing to disagree?
SkyeDS: I know I"m not going to change her mind and all s he does
when she keeps going on about it is annoying the pig (while trying to
teach her to dance)
evile: By disengaging from you & discussion of horses, that may be as
far as she goes on 'agreeing to disagree'
SkyeDS: ok, so why not let me disengage the half a dozen times I tried
SkyeDS: then storming off wouldn't have been necessary
evile: She thinks people are at risk. She is afraid for them.
SkyeDS: she said that. I heard that. I acknowledged hearing that.
Nothing I said made a damn bit of difference, and nothing she said is
going to make a damn bit of difference to me.
SkyeDS: and rather than letting it go when I tried to change the
subject she kept right on going until she worked herself up into
storming off.
evile: So...she disengaged. Now you do the same, and try to be calm
and enjoy what you've decided to do.
SkyeDS: why did she not disengage when I tried to?
SkyeDS: am I not allowed to disengage?
SkyeDS: should I have just stormed off by way of disengaging?
evile: perhaps she didn't read the attempt correctly...worrying about
what shoud and should not have happened and when is not goign to
change what actually happened. Take what you know and go forward.
SkyeDS: this reinforces my fuck this and fuck you (whomever) response.
SkyeDS: if nothing I do is perceived the way it's intended, then it's
out of my control and I"ll do what I damned well please and quit
giving a damn about the feelings of people around me
evile: If that's a response that will end up making you feel better
than you do now, maybe so. But I suspect you'd end up beating up on
yourself if you descended to that level of behavior.
SkyeDS: that goes against everything I believe, but there it is.
SkyeDS: I attempt to disengage, I get run over
SkyeDS: and then she hits and runs by way of disengaging
SkyeDS: I fucking don't deserve that.
evile: things dont' always go the way you want them to.
SkyeDS: particularly not from someone that I have invested as much of
myself into as Sharjinka
evile: Why don't you quit beating up on yourself and quit agonizing,
do something else for a while,and let things settle down?

comments

3236bullshit w/sineater re: 'snarking'/'egging on', I suspect.

2022-06-11T17:32:34Z

May 24, 2005

--- sineater wrote:

Thank you,

sineater .

=========================
-----Original Message-----
From: evilE
Sent: Tuesday, May 24, 2005 12:38 PM
To: ., sineater
Subject: Re: Yo!

Short, sweet & to the point, eh?

You're welcome :)

As always when a gathering exceeds a certain size, I
don't feel like I got to visit enough with everyone, but I hope you
had a nice time.

Love ya, bro!

=========================
--- sineater wrote:
Had a good time, though sounds like I missed the fun
stuff ;)
Had a question for you, not sure how to ask it
though
=======================================

Date: Tue, 24 May 2005 10:42:11 -0700 (PDT)
From: "evilE H"
Subject: RE: Yo!
To: sineater

I figured something was up; you don't usually write or
call just to say hi. :P

Ask away; I reserve the right to say no and/or
respectfully decline to answer, as any thinking adult
is free to do. :)

3237Re: bullshit w/sineater re: 'snarking'/'egging on', I suspect.

Expand Messages

May 24, 2005

--- sineater wrote:
Well of course, turkey-butt. :P
Have I done anything to piss ladydreamtime or Nikiyoy
off? (Or did I just have really bad BO yesterday? *snf snf*)

------------------------------------------
-----Original Message-----
From: evilE
Sent: Tuesday, May 24, 2005 1:51 PM
To: ., sineater
Subject: RE: Yo!

Is there a specific incident you are referring to,
or some general
'vibe' you just picked up out of the ether?

-- sineater wrote:
Nah just a vibe I guess
*bzzzzzz*

Subject: RE: Yo!
Date: Tue, 24 May 2005 13:54:21 -0500
From: sineater
To: evile

I'm just paranoid :(

===============
Me to sineater:

FWIW:

ladydreamtime is not very touchy-feely with anyone, she doesn't often show up
to things alone or sit and visit for very long, and she's not
inclined to sit and listen to anyone go on about things that don't
interest her for any length of time. She likes BDSM and Musicals and
Theatre, and that's what she'll talk about at length, and not much
else. That's just her way, so if that's the way she treated you,
that's the way she is.

Nikiyoy may have been acting protectively towards Onyxlynxx. I noticed that
you were being a little handsy with Onyxlynxx, and Onyxlynxx didn't seem 100%
comfy. But I don't know if she was uncomfy with YOU, or because it
was a larger crowd than she's used to, or what. Since Onyxx didn't
actually SAY anything, I didn't take any action, but Nikiyoy is a bit
more sensitive about such things due to her own experiences and may
have been acting from that.

Hope that helps.

3238Re: bullshit w/sineater re: 'snarking'/'egging on', I suspect.

Expand Messages

May 24, 2005

Subject: RE: Yo!
Date: Tue, 24 May 2005 14:04:32 -0500
From: sineater

Ah ok. Glad to know I didn't smell bad... I'm sorry if I made Onyxlynxx
uncomfortable. I know she's going through some rough shit, guess I was
overcomforting. I will extend apologies. Nikiyoy didn't seem so much
protective as just crabby. I wanted to ask who peed in her Post
Toasties, then thoguht better of it. And sorry, didn't realize I was
being too touchy feely. Everybody was hugging me... Especially the
men.
Umm... K...

comments

3235icq w/thewordnerd

2022-06-11T17:09:46Z

May 23, 2005

thewordnerd: Hey, sorry to hear about your party stress. :( I definitely
understand where you're coming from, which is why I'm starting to
dislike parties. I usually have lots of RSVPs and lots of no-shows.
evile: Yup. I had already decided I was never ever throwing another
party again, and the last few full moon gatherings were anywhere
between 3-7 people, nothing fancy, just hanging out...I got crazy
again and tried to make it into a big thing and it's making me
unhappy.
evile: the worst of it is that the two biggest "maybes" are sineater and
his wife, and unfortunately it takes some effort for me to get into
the headspace I need to deal with them. If not properly braced (or
perhaps fortified with sangria) I won't be ready to deal with their
shit.
thewordnerd: Ah. That's so frustrating. It's just common sense to me to
RSVP, and then to honor that RSVP by either showing or not, whichever
you picked.
thewordnerd: Ewww.
evile: Oh well. This will only suck if I remain in sucky headspace.
So I'm just going to relax, go home, lock up the cats, change into
party clothes, put out food & drinks, and let the evening happen as
it will.
evile: I know there are at least 5 people coming, plus me and Sweetie.
Actually, I like a group about that size, because people can actually
sit and visit.
thewordnerd: Good idea. :) Sounds like a fun time. I'd totally be there if
I didn't have other plans.
evile: Well, I'm glad you have plans, anyway.
thewordnerd: How often do you make sangria? Any chance that I can try some
sometime? Just wanting a taste to put to the name, I don't want to
drain you dry or anything. :)
evile: Oh, this is the inaugural batch. I just keep adding to it all
summer and always have it in the fridge once the weather gets hot.
thewordnerd: Oh, heh, that's cool. :)
thewordnerd: And you keep it around all summer?
evile: yeah, it just gets better the longer you let it sit.
thewordnerd: Oh, neat.
evile: My recipe is one I got from my friend J-Law and then modified a
bit. mix lemon juice and sugar until the sugar dissolves, put it in
your big Sangria bucket/pitcher/whatever. then add 1 bottle of nasty
white wine and one bottle of really bad red. Then add pulpless orange
juice, vodka, and triple sec, slice oranges and lemons and float on
top. Let it all sit for at least overnight, preferably longer
evile: occasionally I will use orange/pineapple/strawberry or pine-
orange-banana or something like that.
thewordnerd: Damn, again that sounds good. I think I'm going to have to
keep a batch made too, once I can afford the ingredients. :)
evile: I have one of those 'sun tea' pitchers that I keep my sangria
in.
evile: I think it's about a gallon and a half or so.
thewordnerd: Oh, wow, that's quite a bit. :) How strong of a drink is it?
evile: depends on how much vodka and triple sec you slosh in. For
me, it's situational. I put lots and lots when I was doing a picnic
and the rubber pig & spawn were invited.
thewordnerd: Ah, yes, probably a good idea in that instance. Ugh...
evile: And I think I took some of that same batch on the poly tubing
trip, which turns out to have been a good idea.
thewordnerd: Heh, yeah, I'd imagine so. Some of the stories I heard about
that trip sound like they're best experienced from the other side of
an alcoholic haze.
evile: heehee. Yup.
evile: That's a nice river, though, so hopefully we'll get down there
this summer with a better class of people :)
thewordnerd: Yeah, it sounds like fun. I'd definitely be interested in
going.
evile: I'll keep ya posted.
thewordnerd: And if a better class of people aren't there then we can wait
for them to start floating, then unleash the piranas(SP?).
evile: *laff* Too funny. You know the movie "pirahna" was filmed
there, don't you?
thewordnerd: Then, once that whole situation has moved a good distance down-
river, we can start.
thewordnerd: No, I didn't. Hmmm, synchronicity.
evile: *laugh* that makes it even funnier!
thewordnerd: Indeed. :)
thewordnerd: So, yeah, they probably don't sell those at the petshop.
Unfortunate. That makes my job harder.
evile: maybe we could just keep one on a leash with a muzzle....
thewordnerd: Hmmm, good idea! And we can teach it 'fetch'.
evile: *laff* We can send it commands with an underwater fish whistle!
thewordnerd: LOL
evile: hehee! too funny :)
thewordnerd: Ooo, maybe we can teach it to dive for things in places where
people flip. A friend of my uncle's used to do that and come back
with bags of expensive sunglasses and such, and sell them.
evile: Oh, how funny!
evile: I think I lost a pair of sunglasses that trip, come to think
of it. They were cheap, so I didn't care.
thewordnerd: Heh. Seems like it'd be a fun thing to try. I remember hearing
about all sorts of things that he'd dug up, though unfortunately I
don't remember what they were now, just that they surprised me.
evile: I bet.
evile: if this past weekend is any indication, I know i want to spend
the summer in the water!!
thewordnerd: Gah, I wonder if I'm stupid? I need to pay my electric bill,
but I don't have a bill itself, just the account number and an
amount. So I'm trying to find a number for the HEB near me to call
and ask if that's enough information to make a payment there, and
smartpages keeps saying that it can't find any in my region. Gah.
thewordnerd: Heh, me too. I really want to play in some of the swimming
holes at Bull Creek.
evile: Me too. I need to find my good aquasox soon. I put them
somewhere I wouldn't lose them I'm sure.
thewordnerd: I need to get some more. My last pair were stolen. :( I really
missed them, because I could wear them on the beach and the seal kept
the sand off very nicely.
evile: *nod* I hate getting dirt and rocks in my shoes. ANd I hate
stepping on slimy icky stuff in bare feet, so I prefer to wear
soemthing in the water unless I'm in a pool.
thewordnerd: Understandable. They offer better traction when you *do* step
on the slimy stuff, too, which I like.
evile: yeah. bull creek has a couple of slippery paces
thewordnerd: So you have Wednesday-Friday off?
evile: Yes, I do. And I just found out that my new drivers license
ought to be at the p.o. box now, so I can drive without worrying
about being arrested. And maybe rent a car so I can drive out of town!
thewordnerd: Oh, nice. Glad that's taken care of. :)
evile: me too! It would be nicer if one of OUR cars was drive-able
out of town, but I told my friend Rio I'd be in SAn Antonio Friday to
see her, so that's what's gonna happen.
thewordnerd: Ah. Ugh, so you're completely out of cars?
evile: Sweetie seems to think that the blue trooper won't make it out of
town; I think I agree. It has a radiator leak.
thewordnerd: Hmmm. That sucks. :(
evile: well, crap! Time snuck up on me. Time to run away! YAY!

thewordnerd: Ok, bye, have fun tonight! Don't get too stressed. :)

comments

3233me & J-Law

2022-06-11T17:02:03Z

May 23, 2005

--- J-Law wrote:
I am swamped! We had a good weekend, and I am
already for the next one (three days - yay!)

I hope you had a FANTASTIC birthday and weekend!

Love,

J-Law
===============

Date: Mon, 23 May 2005 11:51:18 -0700 (PDT)
From: "evilE H"
Subject: Re: aaaaaaaaaaaah!
To: "J-Law”

Yup, I had a great time!

Friday we had dinner with a bunch of people at
Mongolian BBQ. I went to bed early (yoga the next a.m.
) and Sweetie went out drinking beer and such with folks.
They ended up at the Yellow Rose & Max got him a lap
dance. Too funny!

Saturday I went to Yoga with e and then we drove
up to the Crossings for our spa day. Next time you're
here, we're definitely doing a day pass at The
Crossings--it's so nice up there. We booked too many
treatments for the amount of time we had; had to rush
through lunch and didn't get enough time sitting
around the hottub, swimming in the pool, etc. But
we'll know for next time.

I got a salt scrub and a stone massage--the massage
was *wonderful*! The warm stones really helped the
muscles relax very deeply. The scrub was nice, but
nothing I couldn't have done myself for cheaper.

Then Sunday I mowed, weedwhacked, cleaned house, did
laundry, and went grocery shopping. Whee!

Tonight we're having people over for full moon and
fire in the backyard, and I'm afraid I over-extended
myself, got too ambitious on the menu etc, and now
it's stressy instead of laid back. But I know that the
difference is only in my perception. If I can just
settle down and breathe a while it'll be FINE and
everyone will have a nice time.

Happy Monday! I'm so glad this is a short week;
everything about work annoys me today.

comments

3232Commune/Cohousing

2022-06-11T16:59:15Z

May 23, 2005

Seems the idea of some sort of communal life has been circulating
among several of my friends. Not that I'm really in a position to do
so (I don't think) but it still seems like a really cool idea, given
the right neighbors.

One friend asked me what I thought about it, and I spoke my fears (I
will do all the work, pay for everything, and end up having to raise
kids I didn't make and don't want) rather than my hopes (being
surrounded by supportive friends, many people to create new things
with, neighbors you know, trust, and like, extra resources, being
able to share what I know and what I have with people who will
appreciate and reciprocate)

My original concept (people in individual cabins with a central area
for dining, crafts, library, movies, etc.) is looking an awful lot
like what is being called cohousing. http://www.cohousing.org/

I am just wondering...what makes this able to happen? If a group
wanted to set up a childfree, or buddhist, or Catholic, or gay, or
Renfaire oriented community, what would stop someone from suing the
group for discriminating against them and forcing the community to
accept a childed family among the childfree, a pagan among the
Catholics, a straight among the queers? As it stands now, I believe
fair housing laws prevent conventional landlords from discriminating
on whatever basis. So how do cohousing groups get around anti-
discrimination laws?

Because, seriously, I WANT to discriminate. I want to have lawful,
hard-working neighbors who share my lifestyle and views on life, or
else it'd be just like living where I do now, only I'd have to mow
their lawns and babysit their kids and shit.

comments

evile

3558Girls Night

3688horoscopey stuff

3671Full moon

3668Potential drama on Thursday

3610LYRICS - Two Kinds of Love, Stevie Nicks

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G3UTExOEVxc

3830last night's dream

3817Diaryland Survey - cashout by lisatote

3808Diaryland Survey - imnosy by cosmicrayola

3804Diaryland Survey - woolfabric by sporesgirl

3787Diaryland Survey - housebuying by Neko_Carre

3785Diaryland Survey - pirates by pyrite

3784Re: mercury retrograde or something

3781Chrisloy HBB hunting.

3780icq w/A

3767*argh*

3250icq w/A

3249icq w/Sharjinka

3248Re: internet stalking

3246Craft nite at Sharjinka's

3242icq w/Sharjinka

3239ICQ w/A (teh crazy 'snarking' and 'egging')

3236bullshit w/sineater re: 'snarking'/'egging on', I suspect.

3237Re: bullshit w/sineater re: 'snarking'/'egging on', I suspect.

3238Re: bullshit w/sineater re: 'snarking'/'egging on', I suspect.

3235icq w/thewordnerd

3233me & J-Law

3232Commune/Cohousing

3767argh